Converting to Islam - Advice appreciated!

Laura_lolly87

Hi everyone!

Like a lot of people born in Ireland I was born catholic.When I was around 16 (i'm 23 now) I started to ask questions of the religion. Priests and teachers couldn't answer my questions and told me it was wrong to ask these questions. I studied theology, biblical studies and christology in college and realised there were more questions than answers in the religion. For me anyway.

When I was 18 I met the guy who is now my best friend and his family. They are originally from South Africa but living in Ireland for almost 10 years now. His father was able to answer any question I had about any religion and talked to me for endless hours about his beliefs and lifestyle .

I have been thinking about converting for a long time now. I recently had a very long chat with my friend and he has agreed to help me learn the religion and learn the way of life.

So i'm finally getting to the point. As my friend was born muslim and grew up in the religion but there is one thing he cant help me with , and that is peoples reaction when I tell them I have converted. Has anyone here converted from a catholic religion? My main problem is the Arabic prayers, any tips on that? Has anyone had to tell their parents (who are practising catholic), if so how did they take it? I tried explaining to 2 close friends the other night and from the way it seems now I think i may have lost them as friends.

I'm very sorry that this is so long but any advice or personal stories would help me a lot, thank you very much!

Hi Laura
Best of luck with the converting/reverting and telling your family

Just a thought though - sounds like you're converting only because of disillusionment with your previous religion and because someone in Islam talked to you - be sure you have considered everything and that you agree with what you're converting/reverting to

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar

how can you have questions about christianity that lead you away from it but think islam is right for you?

maybe agnosticism/aethism would suit you better?

Laura_lolly87

Hey I probably didn't explain that very well.

I had questions that couldn't be answered by the catholic religion, and when I did get answers I had more questions so I went and found more answers that left me knowing that the catholic religion wasnt something I could believe in. I realised this when I was about 17. I did humanities in college and gave it up after a year and a half, so thats where the classes were taken.

I have been talking to my friend and his dad and his family about Islam for about 5 years now. The reason it's taken so long for me to actually say I want to convert is because I wanted to be totally sure. I wanted to know I was doing it for the right reason and not because I can say I belong to a a religion. I wanted to convert over 3 years ago but my friends Dad told me to go and find the truth first and not just rush in without thinking. I know I still have a lot of learning to do butonly I can know that this is right for me.

Laura_lolly87

Laura_lolly87 wrote: »

Hey I probably didn't explain that very well.

I had questions that couldn't be answered by the catholic religion, and when I did get answers I had more questions so I went and found more answers that left me knowing that the catholic religion wasnt something I could believe in. I realised this when I was about 17. I did humanities in college and gave it up after a year and a half, so thats where the classes were taken.

I have been talking to my friend and his dad and his family about Islam for about 5 years now. The reason it's taken so long for me to actually say I want to convert is because I wanted to be totally sure. I wanted to know I was doing it for the right reason and not because I can say I belong to a a religion. I wanted to convert over 3 years ago but my friends Dad told me to go and find the truth first and not just rush in without thinking. I know I still have a lot of learning to do butonly I can know that this is right for me.

Fair enough so, best of luck
There are a lot of female muslim articles around the place on headscarves and dealing with people's reactions in case you want to wear one, pretty interesting.

Laura_lolly87

Thank you for that!

I do want get an open faced burka, i'll need it for prayer. I think I should have look at those articles so I can know what to expect.

Laura_lolly87

Laura_lolly87 wrote: »

Thank you for that!

I do want get an open faced burka, i'll need it for prayer. I think I should have look at those articles so I can know what to expect.

I can't find recent ones but these are good:
http://www.islamfortoday.com/women.htm#Converts
http://www.islamfortoday.com/women.htm#Hijab
this one is interesting http://www.islamfortoday.com/syed06.htm :eek:
I don't know about the website though, the muslim folks around here will let us know I'm sure
http://www.womeninislam.org/

Oh yeah here it is, this is one I was reading
http://ummah2.com/archives/blogs/5637-for-american-muslims-choosing-to-wear-the-veil-poses-challenges.html

Laura_lolly87

thank you very much for those links. I found the last one about the woman wearing the niqab in America very interesting.

Jaafa

As regards your question about prayer it really isnt too much too it. This site should help http://www.islamdoor.com/Prayers.htm

As its says you can say some of the saalat in english. 'Surahs' or prayers from the quran have to be said in arabic but they are only a few words.

Also note their is a slight difference in the way sunni and shia muslims pray. When standing Shias keep their arms by their sides while sunnis fold their arms across their chests.

Hope that helps and good luck reverting. Sallam.

Fuhrer

What were your questions?

Freiheit

Good luck Laura...I hope you find fulfilment in Islam!:) Islam for today actually appears quite progressive.

Tomtata

I converted from Catholic to Antitheism - Its opened up a new way of thinking. It really is great to throw off the believe system that was forced on me as a child.

Best of luck on your Journey.

Freiheit

Did you formally join such an organisation Tomtata? Does one exist in Ireland? I'm interest in becoming a Humanist officially, already am in my brain.

Tomtata

Hi Freiheit, I don’t believe there is a Antitheism organisation in Ireland (I may be wrong).

TBH I don’t feel the need to belong to an Organisation,

I think the national Secular society in the UK do great work http://www.secularism.org.uk/ supporting an Irish equivalent would be top of my list.

P.S. I have formally left the Catholic Church.

irishconvert

Laura_lolly87 wrote: »

Hi everyone!

Like a lot of people born in Ireland I was born catholic.When I was around 16 (i'm 23 now) I started to ask questions of the religion. Priests and teachers couldn't answer my questions and told me it was wrong to ask these questions. I studied theology, biblical studies and christology in college and realised there were more questions than answers in the religion. For me anyway.

When I was 18 I met the guy who is now my best friend and his family. They are originally from South Africa but living in Ireland for almost 10 years now. His father was able to answer any question I had about any religion and talked to me for endless hours about his beliefs and lifestyle .

I have been thinking about converting for a long time now. I recently had a very long chat with my friend and he has agreed to help me learn the religion and learn the way of life.

So i'm finally getting to the point. As my friend was born muslim and grew up in the religion but there is one thing he cant help me with , and that is peoples reaction when I tell them I have converted. Has anyone here converted from a catholic religion? My main problem is the Arabic prayers, any tips on that? Has anyone had to tell their parents (who are practising catholic), if so how did they take it? I tried explaining to 2 close friends the other night and from the way it seems now I think i may have lost them as friends.

I'm very sorry that this is so long but any advice or personal stories would help me a lot, thank you very much!

Salaam Laura,

Welcome to the Islam forum. It's great to hear about your search for the truth and that it lead you to Islam :-)

There is a poster here who is also female revert. She may be able to help you with some of your concerns and questions. Her username is IrishMuslim, perhaps you should drop a PM to her?

donaghs

Most people are born into a religion, but thankfully in this country we have the freedom to choose our own religion. Perhaps you could have become disillusioned with another religion had you been born into it? It's worth thinking these things through before you make adopt a faith.

If you ever decided to change you mind in future, you should also bear in how people interpret apostasy in Islamm http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Apostasy_in_Islam. Admittedly this shouldn't be too much of an issue if you remain in Ireland.

Good luck with your decision nonetheless.

alex73

Laura_lolly87 wrote: »

Hi everyone!

Like a lot of people born in Ireland I was born catholic.When I was around 16 (i'm 23 now) I started to ask questions of the religion. Priests and teachers couldn't answer my questions and told me it was wrong to ask these questions. I studied theology, biblical studies and christology in college and realised there were more questions than answers in the religion. For me anyway.

When I was 18 I met the guy who is now my best friend and his family. They are originally from South Africa but living in Ireland for almost 10 years now. His father was able to answer any question I had about any religion and talked to me for endless hours about his beliefs and lifestyle .

I have been thinking about converting for a long time now. I recently had a very long chat with my friend and he has agreed to help me learn the religion and learn the way of life.

So i'm finally getting to the point. As my friend was born muslim and grew up in the religion but there is one thing he cant help me with , and that is peoples reaction when I tell them I have converted. Has anyone here converted from a catholic religion? My main problem is the Arabic prayers, any tips on that? Has anyone had to tell their parents (who are practising catholic), if so how did they take it? I tried explaining to 2 close friends the other night and from the way it seems now I think i may have lost them as friends.

I'm very sorry that this is so long but any advice or personal stories would help me a lot, thank you very much!

I was very interested in Islam, However the more I understood Mohammed the more I came to see a Totalitarian who manipulated religion for his own end. He had a very active sexual life with 13 women. The Man was obviously very intelligent, however I was never convinced he was really a man of god, just a great manipulator who knew how to pull together a Religous cult from Judeo/Christian sources. There are many good points about Islam, But I find Christ a more convincing religious figure that Mohammed.

af_thefragile

alex73 wrote: »

I was very interested in Islam, However the more I understood Mohammed the more I came to see a Totalitarian who manipulated religion for his own end. He had a very active sexual life with 13 women. The Man was obviously very intelligent, however I was never convinced he was really a man of god, just a great manipulator who knew how to pull together a Religous cult from Judeo/Christian sources. There are many good points about Islam, But I find Christ a more convincing religious figure that Mohammed.

That was a very common view of Muhammed among the medieval Christians though it is still quite prevalent today.

The question of sexuality was always very hard of christians to get their head around as it was very antagonistic to the Christian belief of chastity and not following the flesh/bodily desires.

Islam was/is very liberal towards sexuality and there is a very good reason Muhammad had many wives.

T.J. Winter (aka Sk. Abdul Hakim Murad) who is probably the most learned Islamic scholar in the west has a very good lecture explaining sexuality in Islam and Muhammad's wives.

The lecture is a bit long so you'ld need to be a bit patient to listen through it but as with religious things, it is very important to first deconstruct the key concepts and misconceptions before you can start building up the picture.
Here it is:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mnxUBlfz14k

Also Islam if anything is very libertarian than anything. Its just unfortunate that the muslim world is ruled by many totalitarian regiemes but in Islam you are free to live your life the way you want. You are only answerable to God hence whatever you do, you do it for God. Not for the Prophet, not for the religion, not for the state but for God alone. Its a very central and key concept of Islamic jurisprudence and spirituality.

hivizman

Thanks for the link to Tim Winter's lecture.

The lecture ("Islam and Gender: The Prophet and His Wives") is split into seven parts on YouTube, and all seven parts can be accessed by following this link.

There's a sound-only version (MP3) on Tim Winter's blog Cambridge Khutbas Etc.

seensensee

Laura_lolly87 wrote: »

Thank you for that!

I do want get an open faced burka, i'll need it for prayer. I think I should have look at those articles so I can know what to expect.

Converting to Islam... have you looked into sharia law? on a bad day you may be obliged to accept punishment beatings from you husband. you may be obliged to share your husband with other wives.
Mind you having come from one oppressive religion ( for women ) probably makes it easier convert to another.

Wishing you the very best of extra good luck.

af_thefragile

seensensee wrote: »

Converting to Islam... have you looked into sharia law? on a bad day you may be obliged to accept punishment beatings from you husband. you may be obliged to share your husband with other wives.
Mind you having come from one oppressive religion ( for women ) probably makes it easier convert to another.

Wishing you the very best of extra good luck.

For the millionth time I must say it again Islam does not permit the beating of women.

No where in the Quran or Hadith does it say you can beat your wife. The people who beat their wives would beat their wives regardless of religion. You find such people everywhere. It's got nothing to do with religious teachings.

And about sharing your husband with other wives. If you are not comfortable with the concept of polygamy and don't want your husband to marry other women, you can state that cause in your marriage contract that you don't want your husband to marry other women and in case he does you'ld divorce him.

The shariah allows you to do that.


The shariah law also states a man has a duty to treat his wife by fulfilling any of her needs. He needs to spend his wealth on her, buy her gifts and pay for all the expenses of the household (if the wife wants to contribute she can but she isn't obliged to). All of her wealth belongs to her and she can spend it the way she wishes. She is not obliged to do all the cooking and cleaning either. If she doesn't want to cook and clean the husband can not force her to do that.
The only thing the wife is obliged to do is raise the children because motherly love, nourishment and teaching is essential for the child to grow up properly. Though again this duty is not the mother's alone either.

This is the shariah law regarding marriage and there is a lot more about marriage and inheritance which one would consider very progressive and not oppressive to the women at all.

seensensee

Sorry, I've already been infracted for a debatable post and can go no further in this forum.

Cheers.

alex73

seensensee wrote: »

Converting to Islam... have you looked into sharia law? on a bad day you may be obliged to accept punishment beatings from you husband. you may be obliged to share your husband with other wives.
Mind you having come from one oppressive religion ( for women ) probably makes it easier convert to another.

Wishing you the very best of extra good luck.

Most of the muslim families i know are happy, and women dont seem any less happy. Abuse you get everywhere. However if you are a woman who is not muslim and want to marry muslim you should be prepared. You need to be ready to accept another way of life. You cant generalize.

Fuhrer

af_thefragile wrote: »

For the millionth time I must say it again Islam does not permit the beating of women.

No where in the Quran or Hadith does it say you can beat your wife. The people who beat their wives would beat their wives regardless of religion. You find such people everywhere. It's got nothing to do with religious teachings.

Qur'an (4:34) - "Men are the maintainers of women because Allah has made some of them to excel others and because they spend out of their property; the good women are therefore obedient, guarding the unseen as Allah has guarded; and (as to) those on whose part you fear desertion, admonish them, and leave them alone in the sleeping-places and beat them; then if they obey you, do not seek a way against them; surely Allah is High, Great."

Qur'an (38:44) - "And take in your hand a green branch and beat her with it, and do not break your oath..." Allah telling Job to beat his wife.


Abu Dawud (2141) - "Iyas bin ‘Abd Allah bin Abi Dhubab reported the Apostle of Allah (may peace be upon him) as saying: Do not beat Allah’s handmaidens, but when ‘Umar came to the Apostle of Allah (may peace be upon him) and said: Women have become emboldened towards their husbands, he (the Prophet) gave permission to beat them." At first, Muhammad forbade men from beating their wives, but he rescinded this once it was reported that women were becoming emboldened toward their husbands. Beatings are sometimes necessary to keep women in their place.


Ishaq 969 - Commands that a married woman be "put in a separate room and beaten lightly" if she "act in a sexual manner toward others." According to the Hadith, this can be for an offense as petty as merely being alone with a man to whom she is not related.

Abu Dawud (2126) - "A man from the Ansar called Basrah said: 'I married a virgin woman in her veil. When I entered upon her, I found her pregnant. (I mentioned this to the Prophet).' The Prophet (peace_be_upon_him) said: 'She will get the dower, for you made her vagina lawful for you. The child will be your slave. When she has begotten (a child), flog her'" A Muslim man thinks his is getting a virgin, then finds out she is pregnant. Muhammad tells him to treat the woman as a sex slave and then flog her after she has delivered the child.

strobe

Freiheit wrote: »

Did you formally join such an organisation Tomtata? Does one exist in Ireland? I'm interest in becoming a Humanist officially, already am in my brain.

Freiheit the Humanist association of Ireland
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Humanist_Association_of_Ireland
http://www.humanism.ie/website/index.php

and Atheist Ireland
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atheist_Ireland
http://www.atheist.ie/

Are probably the two you should look into if that's your thing.

Hobbes

People should start following the point of the OP. Any further Proselytizing will result in a temp ban for said people. Thanks.