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need advice re cheating

  • 22-08-2010 8:02am
    #1
    Jake_Cobra
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6 ✭


    possibility my wife is cheating, txting a guy regularly, no phone calls, once to three times per week - mostly wen shes at work, messages exchanged wen out but shes says hes just a friend....i have no proof of it being otherwise but i have serious doubts....any advice? pointless saying it to her as she denies it - obviously


Comments

  • #2
    Kimia
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,897 ✭✭✭Kimia


    What do the text messages say? How do you know about the texts - did she tell you or did you look at them when she wasn't around?


  • #3
    Jake_Cobra
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6 ✭Jake_Cobra


    never seen the messages, she deletes them, i see his name in the reports folder!!!


  • #4
    Kimia
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,897 ✭✭✭Kimia


    Who is he? Have you met him? How does your wife know him?


  • #5
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    we need a lot more info here to get anywhere.

    how is your marriage with your wife?

    Children?

    How long you been together?

    Were you happy up to now?

    Notice a change in her personality?

    Does she socialise without you?

    Does she work with this guy?

    Etc...


  • #6
    diverdad
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 80 ✭✭diverdad


    She deletes all the messages. Yes I'd wonder why too unless she is in the habit of deleting all her messages all the time from all her texts sent and received.
    You say that there aren't any actual calls between them. You know this for certain?
    Sadly it seems like she is building a relationship up with this person and keeping it hidden from you. You may have stumbled onto the beginning of something but there is still a lot of time to change things; being more attentive, compliment her more, make her feel valued and wanted.
    It could of course be just as she says and its only a friendship.
    You need to talk to her about this if your fears persist. Somewhere that you [or she] can't get worked up about it preferably and would have to maintain a conversation. Doubts like you have will only grow unless brought out into the light and discussed.


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  • #7
    fungun
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,120 ✭✭✭fungun


    Jake_Cobra wrote: »
    possibility my wife is cheating, txting a guy regularly, no phone calls, once to three times per week - mostly wen shes at work, messages exchanged wen out but shes says hes just a friend....i have no proof of it being otherwise but i have serious doubts....any advice? pointless saying it to her as she denies it - obviously

    i dont even know who my wife texts. you have obviously checked this out & found the deleted texts for a reason. So even before the texts you didnt trust her....why? whether or not she is cheating, you dont trust her, so tbh thats the death knell for most relns anyway


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