are there ANY decent lesbians around?!!

LegacyUser

is it just me, or is it EXTREMELY difficult to meet decent women these days?!!! i'm 31, have been in 3 long term relationships, with a few bits n bobs in between, but have been single for well over a year now and seriously cannot find ANYONE even half decent!!! all the usuals like the george, dragon, prohomo, kiss, etc all just seem to have the exact same crowd every single week/time they're on and i'm really not being funny, but you wouldn't exactly call the majority of the women in those places desirable!
do'nt get me wrong, i'm not looking for someone PERFECT, or an Angelina or anything, but seriously, has it all just gone to the dogs or is old age creeping up on me?!! i'm serioualy losing all hope here......

Skipper83

It's not just you! Seems very hard to meet anyone just nice and normal!

rainbow kirby

Have you thought about going to any of the Running Amach events?

AssaultedPeanut

Agreed.
There is a serious drought in women who aren't mental/thick/disturbed/drama queers.......on the scene anyway.

spurious

So get off the scene.
The Running Amach suggestion is good - all sorts of women there.

Donnaghm

Is there a male equivalent of running amach?

Annasopra

Donnaghm wrote: »

Is there a male equivalent of running amach?

Sort of but not really

There are LOTS of different groups though

LegacyUser

I know I'm not out so it doesnt help but Im 18 and I never ever meet bi or les girls The only ones I meet are in gay bars and they're all....um....kinda weird. And if not weird, then they're all old and butch which no offence just isn't my type.

I looked at this running amach thing which seems like a great idea cos I just dont know how else to meet girls

BUT, everyone seems kinda out of my agr group. Is there a running amach for a younger age group? lol

rainbow kirby

If you're young and in Dublin, try Prhomo (very studenty night out), BeLonGTo or other LGBT youth groups, or college LGBT societies.

CluelessGirl

They are definitely not on the scene....most self respecting girls I associate with have never gone on the scene....I usually meet them at parties or threw groups or even on some dating sites.....ones that are not scene related but there are many genuine and sane ladies out there....just look in the right places....
met my partner of nearly 3 years and we have never been on the scene.

baby and crumble

That's the thing, isn't it, the best place to meet 'normal' people is in well... normal places. (not saying the scene isn't normal, here folks!)

I'm just saying that in general if you meet someone through a shared interest like a college society or something, you have more in common than a random punter you score on a night out, that goes for straight couples too!

LegacyUser

Yeah I mean I guess it works for some people! Obviously, there must be lots of gay and bi women who have met they're gf's under 'normal' circumstances. It's not even that I'm desperately looking for a gf....just to explore my sexuality more, make gay/bi friends etc.

But I have so many places to meet people...friends through work, travelling, Im involved in sport, I do volunteer work, I go to a lot of gigs, pubs, clubs etc. and yet I still dont meet anyone!

Must be something wrong with me!!

Jessibelle

Firstly there is nothing wrong with you, please don't think that. Secondly, meeting people outside the scene is slightly different in that the automatic assumption that you're gay/bi isn't there, and therefore if someone is interested in you, they may proceed more cautiously until they sound you out and get the vibes that you're interested back. Just be yourself and it'll happen.

shoegirl

monagard166 wrote: »

The only ones I meet are in gay bars and they're all....um....kinda weird. And if not weird, then they're all old and butch which no offence just isn't my type.

Its a kind of chicken-and-egg problem.

Normal, ordinary girls get so put off the scene they just stop going and leave it all to the, well, less normal ones.

Running Amach is lovely but the trouble with groups like that is that as long as they remain honest and open sooner or later they get discovered by the "usual suspects" - its really hard to keep the more "unusual" people away from groups like that - the nicer it is to start with, the more they will eventually gravitate towards it. Hard thing to stop really.

To be honest, I don't really go on the scene any more. I meet too many people I know. Some nice but a lot of people I want to avoid. Its terrible to say but last week one of my sisters mentioned to me that all of my exes and gay friends were "freaks." You know, I'd love to say otherwise, but they weren't exactly the kind of people you could take home without being told not to bring them again.

Whats sad and symptomatic also is my youngest sister who is also gay just won't go out at all, she just cannot relate to the "loud and proud" element which she finds doesn't speak for her at all. And I kind of understand that.

Its really hard for things to change but I think eventually sheer force of numbers does it, as the numbers go upwards I think eventually normal women will outnumber the ghetto.

Kanoe

sweet advice.

(I'm only half decent though)

Ivy91

monagard166 wrote: »

I know I'm not out so it doesnt help but Im 18 and I never ever meet bi or les girls The only ones I meet are in gay bars and they're all....um....kinda weird. And if not weird, then they're all old and butch which no offence just isn't my type.

I looked at this running amach thing which seems like a great idea cos I just dont know how else to meet girls

BUT, everyone seems kinda out of my agr group. Is there a running amach for a younger age group? lol

Hey 'Monagard166'! I'm in the exact same sitch as you mate. I'm 18, 19 later this year and I find it absolutely imposs to find anyone half daycent in this country! I totally hear what you're saying 'bout all them big old scary butches in the gay clubs. SO not my type either. I'm in Cork and have hit Chambers and them a handful of times with my gay friend but just as company for him, soo not a place I could expect to find anyone. I totally feel like i'm the youngest lil lez out there, so when I saw your post saying you were 18 too I had to reply, if even just to have some else to chat to... You got msn or something we could talk on (someplace less public)

Hope to hear from ya girl

Chuchoter

This is completely unhelpful, but are there any lesbians anywhere is my question. My friends keep trying to set me up with the one bi girl in our group of friends, and I'm sorry, but she's a big slut and she's as ugly as sin.I want a girlfriend.:mad:

L.Jenkins

crayolastereo wrote: »

This is completely unhelpful, but are there any lesbians anywhere is my question. My friends keep trying to set me up with the one bi girl in our group of friends, and I'm sorry, but she's a big slut and she's as ugly as sin.I want a girlfriend.:mad:

Can you wait 2 years :P

Aoifums

Same here! I really want a girlfriend yet I'm too young to be on the scene (not that it looks that great from where I'm standing) and I never liked BelongTo. I knew plenty of gay/bi girls last year but they all left the school and they were all kinda psycho! And some of my friends are bi but I don't want to date a friend because I have so few of them that it would be awkward when we broke up.
And to top that, I have no gaydar. So unless you practically hold a sign saying "yes, I'm gay" I have no clue!

Yay for singledom :rolleyes:

Chuchoter

Aoifums, you're 17, I'm 17, we're both big loser single people with no gaydar. We should so be boards girlfriends :P :P

Aoifums

Totally

And judging by that skirt you have excellent tastes!

BettePorter

is it just me...?! wrote: »

is it just me, or is it EXTREMELY difficult to meet decent women these days?!!! i'm 31, have been in 3 long term relationships, with a few bits n bobs in between, but have been single for well over a year now and seriously cannot find ANYONE even half decent!!! all the usuals like the george, dragon, prohomo, kiss, etc all just seem to have the exact same crowd every single week/time they're on and i'm really not being funny, but you wouldn't exactly call the majority of the women in those places desirable!
do'nt get me wrong, i'm not looking for someone PERFECT, or an Angelina or anything, but seriously, has it all just gone to the dogs or is old age creeping up on me?!! i'm serioualy losing all hope here......

Darn it that rules me out so !!!:rolleyes::D

seriously though, personally i find that the scene is pretty much full of the stereotypes and not much else. you've a better chance via social networking sites or the luck of the draw socially. if its for you it won't pass you as they say !

Kanoe

I would like to be Cilla Black right now. There's a lorra lorra lovin goin on in this thread

LegacyUser

Hehehe...I'm thinking a boards.ie bi/les girls meet up is in order?...:)

Annasopra

monagard666 wrote: »

Hehehe...I'm thinking a boards.ie bi/les girls meet up is in order?...:)

feel free to organise something

Kanoe

I noticed a few meet threads have come up lately but nothing ever seems to manifest. I figured there would be a boards lgbt christmas meet on the cards though so happy to leave the organising of events to the pro's Think it would be nice to meet the guys too.

mollzer

Go out and have some fun, you never know what might happen! Join a LGBT forum or local group or something, other than trying to meet someone in the pubs.

Whats the saying about having to kiss a few frogettes before meeting your princess??

I met one or 2 weirdos when I was new to the 'scene', but I met my mrs right through a meet up like some mentioned above.
And I am very decent, and so is she. And we're not the only ones either (by the way I was 35 when I met herself, takes a bit of patience).

Kanoe

would a random off topic chat thread be appropriate here? just wonderin

LegacyUser

Hi i have been on a couple of the gay websites and im finding it hard to meet friends to socialise with. Im 38 very genuine female.

spurious

gymgirl100 wrote: »

Hi i have been on a couple of the gay websites and im finding it hard to meet friends to socialise with. Im 38 very genuine female.

Try Running Amach - it's easily the best of the sites for meeting people - real people.
http://www.meetup.com/Dublin-LGBTQ-Womens-Social-Networking-Club/
547 members and counting.
If you can't find someone in there you like, it's not them, it's you.

Kanoe

gymgirl100 wrote: »

Hi i have been on a couple of the gay websites and im finding it hard to meet friends to socialise with. Im 38 very genuine female.

welcome aboard. Don't know what advice to give other than what's already here. I prefer socialising with straight friends and I've been lucky enough to meet people that way. It can be difficult if you're outside Dublin but sometimes its easier to just stick with what you know, never know who you might meet. If it's just friends you're looking for maybe its time to look further afield than just the ghey.