Invite to evening do

Hey,

Just a question, I've been invited to the 'evening do' of a girl I was mates with in college. What does this generally include? The meal or just the bit after with the DJ and dancing? I would quite like to go, but it's in Ireland and I'm living in London, so don't fancy splashing out for an outfit, a B&B and plane tickets if it's just a few hours, being as broke as I am. If you go to the afters, are you expected to get the couple a present and card? And if I decide not to go, what's the etiquette there?

rainbowtrout

The evening part is the band and DJ. Sandwiches, cocktail sausages etc are usually put out late in the evening. If it was me in your position I wouldn't be bothered travelling from the UK for the afters of a wedding. Too much effort and expense.

If you go, a small gift and card should be enough, you weren't invited to the whole thing. If you don't a reply to say you're not going should be enough. They probably don't expect you to travel from the UK for the afters anyway.

Yeah, that's what I thought, seemed more like a courtesy invite than anything else. Unfortunately didn't see it until today (was sent a month ago) as it was to an old e-mail address so feel a bit bad for not replying. I think I'm definitely not gonna go, would be nice to catch up but it's way too much hassle and expense for just a few hours. My mum was on at me to send a wedding card, insisting that this is essential, is that right? Or would I get away with an email?

BC

If you got the invite by email then I don't see any problem replying by email.

rainbowtrout

BC wrote: »

If you got the invite by email then I don't see any problem replying by email.

Ya, I'd agree and just say sorry for the delay in replying I don't use this email address very often.. As you said yourself it was more of a courtesy invite than anything else.

That's what I thought but last time I did that, my mum ate the head off me for not sending a card, as if it was the rudest thing in the world. I didn't even know that was ever expected.

The invite itself wasn't by email but I was requested to send my postal address so an invite could be posted. Is it still OK to reply by mail and wish them luck?

tinkerbell

Yep reply by email. I don't understand what is so wrong with an email, it's the same as sending a letter!

rainbowtrout

ya and it will save them sending an invite