why is making friends in college so tough

arsenallegend

I've always wondered about this old chesnut been thrown out there by people giving you advice about College life. That you will make ton's of friend's in college cause they will be as likeminded as you and will go to ton's of parties, after the last ten years i've done two fulltime course while i was working nights(which was tough) and i always felt this was a myth really cause i always got the feeling no one is interested in meeting new people.:(

It gets me down cause i've done two courses which were of a great interest to me, while i went there to study i always wanted to make friends(i had lost nearly all my childhood friends by then) but no one seemed too bothered to want to go out, meet outside college or really interact as a group. it was a bit of a downer cause it happened in both courses(they were nice people just not very interested in geting to know one another)

Since i lost my job last year i decided to try again at college, i got these worries even more now cause at least i had a friend or two the last time now i have none at all:( Even more so cause i'm in my lateish 20's and feel this is my last chance i feel of build up frienships cause i don't go out anywhere

I always had the feeling cause i've done all my courses in dublin and most of my fellow students were from dublin they have no great need to make friends cause they could go home to their mates at night.

Its probably silly of me but but did anyone else have this same probelm
its really getting me down cause i always had high hopes i would make mates out of this experience

Ickle Magoo

Is there any campus activities or groups you can join up with or take part in to meet other people?

I think the whole "meeting loads of friends in college" comes from spending three or four years with them, living with fellow students and being immersed in the whole student life, as a mature student you may have to work a bit harder to find people you have more in common with but there are certainly plenty of mature students out there, join a few clubs and even arrange some class nights out and see if you can get to see more people out-with class hours.

Best of luck

R.D. aka MR.D

I'm from the country side and went to college in Dublin and ALL the friends i made bar a few were from Dublin and I ended up making friends with their friends.

I honestly think it's all about making the effort. In 1st year I said yes to every single invite I received. Then people knew that i was some one that was willing to go out/good fun etc

In the second course I did I instigated all the meeting. Just asking people if they wanted to go out/ when suits them exactly.

There were ups and downs and false friendships but I came out the other side with good friends.

You said you were working all the time which probably makes making friends difficult. friendships take time so if you have no time.....
But your not working now?

Don't be desperate but make an effort. Another thing i find is good is concentrating on becoming friends with one person you connect with. Then you have an ally/back-up for when you ask others in the class out for drinks.

NUIG_FiannaFail

Ickle Magoo wrote: »

Is there any campus activities or groups you can join up with or take part in to meet other people?

+1

Join up a political party or debating society. In Galway for example all my best friends are in the Fianna Fáil Cumman and the Literary and Debating Society. Top people who are the salt of the earth and you get to make some great connections for later in life.