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Full of hate - why?
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28-07-2010 3:01am#1
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I think I know eactly how you feel actually, I thought it was just cos I was a natural d*ckhead for a while but like you now, always made sure to be polite and nice etc (which was probably killing me too seeing as I also had a simultaneous crippling paranoia that everyone hated me anyway?!) I got over it for a while, by pretending I was happy, literally just pretending (I had moved towns and it was actually just a game with myself that went too far of how long can I keep the new people thinking I was the super happy yoke in the corner)...it actually started to rub off on me after a while and I genuinely was a much more positive person with less hate for the general populace, until I started letting myself get bothered by the small stuff again... the passers by on the street lookin at me funny, or getting in my way while I was in a hurry, the coffee's too hot, the tea's too cold, the computer's too slow... anything like that could set me off on a negitive spin like you name it, and I'm a bit of a demon when I get going! I think the aul irritation tolerance just went a bit mad there for a while!
I have to keep reminding myself to just be aware of my feelings like, and deliberately try to look for the positives in every situation, and let that be the one I vocalise....for people like us frustration/anger all that bad stuff with no good reason is just indulgance plain and simple, no one's going to get in your head and throw the off switch for ya like, although if you think you may have an underlying cause to it all then definately have a chat with someone who knows you and is not afraid of calling you on your own BS if you get me, if you dont want to go down the counsellor route. I'd say just try being aware of yourself for a while and see how often the Rage pops up, when why and how, maybe even make a little journal of it so you can keep track for yourself, if you start seeing a pattern emerge maybe try sorting that much out first?
I know what it can be like though, you're happy out in a fantastic situation where you could actually fault nothing and suddenly the cloud lands on ya, it truely sucks like! Patterns that I noticed with myself include (but not limited to) having not been oudoors enough/had enough sunlight; not had anything to eat in a while (low blood sugar actually does make you fairly cranky and you dont have to be a diabetic to experience this); un-dealt-with stress from other situations boiling over into other areas of my life; spending too long looking into the computer screen; not enough exercise in the last while; not enough human contact no matter how superficial; taking on more than I can handle and not wanting to admit defeat and generally putting myself under more pressure than i should (I'm a devil for leaving things to the last minute too which doesnt help!) or not having challenged myself enough/not done anything I could be genuinely proud of myself for in a while...I could go on like...but if you see things keep popping up like those things I spotted about myself at least its a start for you, or something to bring up with a counsellor if thats where you're off to next.
I do find its really easy to be angry for no reason though, it makes you feel stronger somehow than when you're just floating along with things, its easy to begin being p'd off at one thing and then shortly realise you've changed the object of your negitive attention maybe several times off the original thing that upset you...I have to be carefull what music I listen to in these moods too like, some indulges the monster more than others, and if I want to stay all upset then grand like but what's the point in that? Best of luck OP, the fact that you've spotted this about yourself is a step in the right direction anyway, most people wouldnt admit to it like!
My dad used sing the old Nat King Cole song at me when he saw me "with a head on me" as a teenager: Smile though your heart is aching, smile even though it's breaking...you'll find that life's still worthwhile if you just smile!
it used to irritate the hell out of me back then, but I kinda appreciate the sentiment now 0 -
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This whole world we live in is out of tune with what our ancestors lived with.
First of all, it's not natural to have as much time on our hands to think as much as we do.
Nor is it natural to have as low a tolerance for boredom as we do nowadays, where everybody has unlimited access to movies, reading material, tv shows, music, games etc by way of the internet. Our minds should not be constantly stimulated like they are.
Nor is it natural to eat such delicious food (relative to the diets of all human history which has went before us) everyday, when we want it, and as much as we want; this leaves us with a low tolerance for not constantly having what we want. It blunts our ability to appreciate food as much as somebody from a tribe on an island in the south pacific would, for example.
Nor is it natural to consume drinks (fizzy drinks) which our laden with sugar and caffeine and over time exhaust our brains' pleasure pathways.
Nor is it natural for us to live in an environment where we don't know or get on with our neighbours, and often times are scared to leave our home.
Nor is it natural for our children and young people to be constantly bombarded with media images of society's most attractive people and be made to feel inferior.
Nor is it natural to commute for hours a day to do a job you hate, with people you don't like, and to have no way of escaping because you need to pay the bills.
Nor is it natural to have pleasure-causing chemicals such as alcohol or other drugs so readily available to try to alleviate the feelings of depression which come with modern day life. There's no such thing as a free lunch and since the experience of pleasure has a physical basis in the brain, you'll find yourself on a serious downer after any serious high, as the pleasure causing chemicals that lead to the unnatural high become temporarily depleted.
Nor is it natural to be pushed from a young age by adults to succeed as best as you can in the crazy fast-paced and pressurised world that we live in. the reality is that telling kids that they can "do anything if they put their mind to it" is simply false for most children. Everybody wants to be at the top of the pyramid with regard to how successful their lives our relative to others, but lots of people need to make up the base of this pyramid; everybody's expectations are just too high and when the "failure" that results from having such high expectations is combined with a fragile or perfectionist mentality, depression easily results.
Nor is it natural to have access to such a wide range of literature about philosophy or science or whatever, that allows us to develop an objectively true but humanly-depressing outlook on life eg. knowing why we think the way we do, knowing about world history, nihilism, determinism ..whatever
Nor is it natural to be so aware (as a result of the media) of the miseries that are endured by people in other continents who you will never meet and who don't care about you. Knowing about these things can wrack us with guilt and make any feelings of depression we might have, even worse, as we try to rationalize how we can feel so terrible when they have things so much worse.
Nor is it natural for us to have access to medical literature about depression as soon as we "google" for it. The criteria listed on those websites are so common amongst the general population that I would guess that half the population would easily receive a diagnosis of depression if they went into the doctor's tomorrow, and were diagnosed by the criteria listed. And so more people than should really be necessary end up taking drugs that nobody really knows the long-term effects of and that leaves a person numb and drugged up for life.
There are lots more things like the above that I believe are contributing to the massive wave of depression which has engulfed the western world in the past few decades, in particular the last two. That's just my opinion, I'd love to see if anybody agrees with me.
We human beings were meant to live simple lives, where we lived in small groups and got on with our neighbours and relatives. Our only goal in life was to keep alive, basically. But look at the western world now. We are perhaps the first or second generation that should, on paper, have zero worries. Instead, society is riddled with troubled people. Everyone thinks they are depressed and no amount of material stuff is capable of alleviating this. We are all badly out of synch with the minds evolution has provided us with.
And with regard to the misanthrope thing...yes, I feel like this sometimes, but I realise that I'm not some special guy who can somehow think outside the box nor do I picture myself above my fellow human beings.
Human nature is all we've got, and you live your life by it just like everybody else, whether you like to believe so or not!
Mod's I hope this post is helpful to somebody, so please allow it to stay here!0 -
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cleremy jarkson wrote: »This whole world we live in is out of tune with what our ancestors lived with.
First of all, it's not natural to have as much time on our hands to think as much as we do.
Nor is it natural to have as low a tolerance for boredom as we do nowadays, where everybody has unlimited access to movies, reading material, tv shows, music, games etc by way of the internet. Our minds should not be constantly stimulated like they are.
Nor is it natural to eat such delicious food (relative to the diets of all human history which has went before us) everyday, when we want it, and as much as we want; this leaves us with a low tolerance for not constantly having what we want. It blunts our ability to appreciate food as much as somebody from a tribe on an island in the south pacific would, for example.
Nor is it natural to consume drinks (fizzy drinks) which our laden with sugar and caffeine and over time exhaust our brains' pleasure pathways.
Nor is it natural for us to live in an environment where we don't know or get on with our neighbours, and often times are scared to leave our home.
Nor is it natural for our children and young people to be constantly bombarded with media images of society's most attractive people and be made to feel inferior.
Nor is it natural to commute for hours a day to do a job you hate, with people you don't like, and to have no way of escaping because you need to pay the bills.
Nor is it natural to have pleasure-causing chemicals such as alcohol or other drugs so readily available to try to alleviate the feelings of depression which come with modern day life. There's no such thing as a free lunch and since the experience of pleasure has a physical basis in the brain, you'll find yourself on a serious downer after any serious high, as the pleasure causing chemicals that lead to the unnatural high become temporarily depleted.
Nor is it natural to be pushed from a young age by adults to succeed as best as you can in the crazy fast-paced and pressurised world that we live in. the reality is that telling kids that they can "do anything if they put their mind to it" is simply false for most children. Everybody wants to be at the top of the pyramid with regard to how successful their lives our relative to others, but lots of people need to make up the base of this pyramid; everybody's expectations are just too high and when the "failure" that results from having such high expectations is combined with a fragile or perfectionist mentality, depression easily results.
Nor is it natural to have access to such a wide range of literature about philosophy or science or whatever, that allows us to develop an objectively true but humanly-depressing outlook on life eg. knowing why we think the way we do, knowing about world history, nihilism, determinism ..whatever
Nor is it natural to be so aware (as a result of the media) of the miseries that are endured by people in other continents who you will never meet and who don't care about you. Knowing about these things can wrack us with guilt and make any feelings of depression we might have, even worse, as we try to rationalize how we can feel so terrible when they have things so much worse.
Nor is it natural for us to have access to medical literature about depression as soon as we "google" for it. The criteria listed on those websites are so common amongst the general population that I would guess that half the population would easily receive a diagnosis of depression if they went into the doctor's tomorrow, and were diagnosed by the criteria listed. And so more people than should really be necessary end up taking drugs that nobody really knows the long-term effects of and that leaves a person numb and drugged up for life.
There are lots more things like the above that I believe are contributing to the massive wave of depression which has engulfed the western world in the past few decades, in particular the last two. That's just my opinion, I'd love to see if anybody agrees with me.
We human beings were meant to live simple lives, where we lived in small groups and got on with our neighbours and relatives. Our only goal in life was to keep alive, basically. But look at the western world now. We are perhaps the first or second generation that should, on paper, have zero worries. Instead, society is riddled with troubled people. Everyone thinks they are depressed and no amount of material stuff is capable of alleviating this. We are all badly out of synch with the minds evolution has provided us with.
And with regard to the misanthrope thing...yes, I feel like this sometimes, but I realise that I'm not some special guy who can somehow think outside the box nor do I picture myself above my fellow human beings.
Human nature is all we've got, and you live your life by it just like everybody else, whether you like to believe so or not!
Mod's I hope this post is helpful to somebody, so please allow it to stay here!
Well none of those things are natural but everyones got a mind, they can educate themselves about how to live a healthly lifestyle, what is good for your body, mind and soul. If people started using their heads, their own minds and thinking for themselves instead of letting themselves be influenced by the way how the western world is. If people lived their life on their own terms many of them wouldn't get upset about how society is because it wouldn't matter to them much. Everyone has a mind and can make choices to be influenced or not.0 -
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