Drink problem

LegacyUser

I have a problem with drink.
I know I have a problem.
I'm fairly sure my family knows about it also, but they never say anything , even when I have been up til 4 in the morning finishing of 8 cans of bud.
I've had the problem for years I think, (at least 8 years I think), but it's getting worse now, I need to get drunk more frequent. I apparently seem to hide it well(or so I tell myself), everyone at home or work ignore it, for example at this moment I've had 8 cans of beer tonight, the last Monday I had that amount I didn't make it into the office until the afternoon.

I don't like the idea of alanon, I have no interest in religion so that is not something that is attractive to me, Would a visit to a doctor be any use?

I have been single for a long time, I no confidence, because of weight issues most likely as a result of excessive drinking.

brokensoul

Admitting you have a problem, even on a message board, is a huge step.

I was absolutely and utterly convinced that i could not give up drinking and i was miserable with my life but felt i coldnt change.

My last drink was in the 15th of August 2007, one day at a time i have not drank since.

I used AA and an addiction counsellor to help me get, and stay, sober. I know you say that you dont like the sound of AA because of the religion thing, but i know athiests who attend AA. It might be worth your while going to one meeting berfore writing it off. At worst it will only mean giving up an hour of your life.

If you dont want to go the AA route then i would certainly recommend meeting with an addiction counsellor.

You can stop drinking. It isnt easy, but it is possible.

Good luck!!

Blackdrag

Sorry to hear the problem. But at least your admitting the problem and that’s the first step.

You’ve already started to think why you’re having the problem
"I have been single for a long time, I no confidence, because of weight issues most likely as a result of excessive drinking."



1) Take yourself to the doctors and find out about a AA meeting.
2) When i wanted to stop drinking i took my self to the gym. got it in my head i want to be fit and i can’t drink to do it.

(Don’t have a drink problem i just really really really like a drink )

Miss Fluff

Wow brokensoul, I remember following your threads on the matter closely. VERY well done you for sticking with it. You fought your addiction head-on with bravery and dignity so it lovely to see this update from you and that you have your life on track.

brokensoul

Miss Fluff wrote: »

Wow brokensoul, I remember following your threads on the matter closely. VERY well done you for sticking with it. You fought your addiction head-on with bravery and dignity so it lovely to see this update from you and that you have your life on track.

Thank you.

Getting married in three weeks, and retraining as a Counsellor so there have been alot of changes in my life in the last three years - even managed to kick the demon cigs!

Thanks again.

Fittle

Broken soul, well done also. Could you recommend an addiction counsellor? I've a brother with a drink problem, similar to the OP - has no interest in AA etc either. I didn't realise there were addiction counsellors specifically...thanks

brokensoul

Fittle wrote: »

Broken soul, well done also. Could you recommend an addiction counsellor? I've a brother with a drink problem, similar to the OP - has no interest in AA etc either. I didn't realise there were addiction counsellors specifically...thanks

HI

I am not sure this forum allows me to mention specific people but there will be listings in the phone book.

Also, there is a book called "ill stop tomorrow" by Paul Cambell which i would recommend for anyone with an addiction to have a read of. Or anyone with a loved one with an addiction.

That gives details of addiction services at the back of it too i think.

Fittle

Ok thanks again - I just googled some and had a few phone numbers for him.

OP, I think you know yourself that you need to get to the bottom of your problem. You need to find out why you drink. You say you have no self esteem and have weight issues. So you are quite low at the moment I would imagine - you don't want to think about your weight, so you drink. You want a relationship but can't see how anyone could love you because of your weight, so you drink. You want to stop drinking but what's the point, so you open another beer.

There are reasons why we all do, what we do OP. It might seem like you have SO much to 'fix' just know - build up your self esteem, loose weight and stop drinking. But if you just took one thing at a time.....
I second what broken soul said - try to find an addiction counselor near you - you have taken one step so far, by writing here. Take the second step and make an appointment with a counselor - you won't regret it.
Best of luck OP.

OP, I second what brokensoul says. The AA is not all about religion. An addiction counsellor would of course also put you in touch with other groups if the religion is for you an issue. The AA is a house hold name of course, but just because you know the name do not think that means it’s the only support group out there.

In fact as far as I know there are support groups just dedicated to addiction, but not of any specific type. Some people there might be alcoholics… but others will be into drugs… porn or sex addiction…. And gambling is a big one too.

Also remember, and brokensoul might back me up on this, giving up an addiction is not just about stopping doing it. If you drink sitting at home then the way to stop is not to sit at home and say “I better not have one…. I better not” because that will quickly change to “Well I will have one or two but I better stop early this time…..” and before you know it you are back in the same place.

Half, if not more, of the secret is to change the habits that lead to the drinking too, not just keep the habits but try cutting out the drink. If it is staying at home on a certain night that is leading to you hitting the beers then change that TOO. Get involved in some drinkless out of the house activities. Night courses. Nights out with friends. Volunteer work. Anything at all that breaks the cycle of sitting at home pining for a can.

Breaking of addictions is not always about keeping your life and changing that one thing. It often involves a series of small unrelated changes that themselves lead to a break of the addiction cycle.

Even if you do not like the idea of the AA or an addiction counsellor, or think they will not work… just tell yourself that even being at those things means it is already working… because you could be sitting at home again with temptation biting at you. There second you are there, and not at home, you are already helping.

Justask

unreg0001 wrote: »

I have a problem with drink.
I know I have a problem.
I'm fairly sure my family knows about it also, but they never say anything , even when I have been up til 4 in the morning finishing of 8 cans of bud.
I've had the problem for years I think, (at least 8 years I think), but it's getting worse now, I need to get drunk more frequent. I apparently seem to hide it well(or so I tell myself), everyone at home or work ignore it, for example at this moment I've had 8 cans of beer tonight, the last Monday I had that amount I didn't make it into the office until the afternoon.

I don't like the idea of alanon, I have no interest in religion so that is not something that is attractive to me, Would a visit to a doctor be any use?

I have been single for a long time, I no confidence, because of weight issues most likely as a result of excessive drinking.

Hi there..

First off as everyone has said to u here that admitting u have a problem with drink is the first step so ur on to ur second step!! thats a good thing right!

You family most likely do know of whats going on but maybe dont know how to approach the issue..
I lived with someone with a drink problem and i did everything i possible could to help but it doesnt work like that. You need to do it for you, support of family and friend are very important but most important is YOU.

my advise is go to ur GP. He will tell you where to go what to do.
I do know that there are tablets you can talk "anti-booze" but im no to sure how they would help in the long run!

I wish you luck and remember YOU CAN DO IT!

tenchi-fan

take some of the temptation away by buying fewer cans. Tesco do a 2% beer. It's not particularly nice but there's a lot less alcohol in it and it's a lot cheaper too. Buy 4 of them instead of 8 bud.

Also, try to fill your evenings with more interesting stuff. Meet friends, join the gym, do an evening course, etc. If you keep yourself busy you won't have time to drink.

brokensoul

tenchi-fan wrote: »

take some of the temptation away by buying fewer cans. Tesco do a 2% beer. It's not particularly nice but there's a lot less alcohol in it and it's a lot cheaper too. Buy 4 of them instead of 8 bud.

Also, try to fill your evenings with more interesting stuff. Meet friends, join the gym, do an evening course, etc. If you keep yourself busy you won't have time to drink.

This is great advice if you drink too much out of habit or boredom.

It wont work if you are an alcoholic though, once you start drinking all will power goes out the window.

To back up taxAHcruel, giving up drinking is about alot more than giving up the physical drink. If you were locked into a room 24 hours a day you would not drink, but you would have no life.

Giving up drinking is the first step, the next step is learning to live without alcohol. I was like a child trying to learn that, and i still struggle at times. I thought when i gave up drink that i would never enjoy a dinner in a restuarant again as wine was such a part of it. Now, i eat out at least once a month and i love it - never even think that i am missing anything by not having wine with the dinner.

To my mind, there is no point in giving up drink if you end up more miserable sober than you are drunk. I now have the freedom to go anywhere and do anything - alcohol robbed me of that for many years. As a result, i dont feel hard done by - i feel blessed.

Again, best of luck with it all.

bp

congrats brokensoul - I remember reading your posts everyday as you started to give up drink and following you as you did it! Congrats on the engagement too!

OP well done in taking the first step, admitting it is such a huge step. As the others have said try AA, you never know, and if nothing else they can give you direction. Finding activities is also a good idea - if you aren't at home with the drink they you cannot drink it. When you leave the house don't take money so you cannot go to the shop (if I remember correctly brokensould you were in Tesco with your mother and didn't go back to buy it after your first day out sober) - just take temptation out of the way, it is a small thing but it may help.

Good luck, I hope you do it

LegacyUser

Things came to a head for me 4 weeks ago today and I finally did something about my problem. I went to the doctor and he put me on a prescription for a week.
I've been off the drink 4 weeks now. I know it's still early days, but I don't intend to drink again. I'm feeling better about myself and am doing a lot better in work also. Hoping to run my first half marathon this year also.
Thanks for the advice, it took a while for me to do something about it, but I'm glad I did.