What does she mean

LegacyUser

Have been seeing a girl 8 months now, its had so many ups and downs. For various reasons We are both not from the country but I may have to return in 2 months because of visa issues. So there is a chance that will be it. Im all confused on what to do. I told her I loved her the other day. She basically said I know then she wrote an email to me saying:

"Life somehow brought me to you, and it was such a blessing because you truly are someone I adore. You have been my best friend through tough times and great times and have just accepted me for me, which has always touched my heart. I have never had anyone like you in my life and although we fight and fight and fight and may not make it to the end of this life together you will always be a part of my heart and soul."

Then "I want to spend the time I have with you to the fullest and have no regrets if anything was to happen. "

What exactly does she mean is she just is she saying adore because she doesn't want to say loves me back? Is she just admitting Its over? Or am I just over analizing this to pieces. I keep getting paranoid she doesn't want to be with me for different reasons. I don't know if I'm being insecure or there is a reason I am.

I think I just need an opinion thank you.

LittleBook

Talk to her.

Not only is your situation unstable because you may be leaving her in two months time, but if you're both non-English speakers but communicating in English (in writing) there's tonnes of room for misunderstandings.

Frankly, it sounds to me like she believes you're leaving her soon and she's trying to accept it and enjoy the rest of the time you have together.

Talk to her.

Beruthiel

LittleBook wrote: »

Frankly, it sounds to me like she believes you're leaving her soon and she's trying to accept it and enjoy the rest of the time you have together.

That's how I'm reading it too.

AngryBadger

Confused. wrote: »

I told her I loved her the other day. She basically said I know then she wrote an email to me saying..."I have never had anyone like you in my life and although we fight and fight and fight and may not make it to the end of this life together you will always be a part of my heart and soul."
Then "I want to spend the time I have with you to the fullest and have no regrets if anything was to happen. "

Sounds to me like she's hedging her bets, if she feels so strongly then what's with the "I know" response to you telling her you loved her? Women usually complain because guys WON'T say this.

Also the "fight and fight and fight" part of her e-mail, that's pretty emphatic. Do ye really fight that much? Because that would be making me back up and review this relationship whether you have work visa issues or not.

Overall that e-mail sounds like she wants to be together while you're still here, but possibly that's because she knows you'll probably be going in 2 months and so there's really little/no emotional investment in her aprt, kind of like having her cake and eating it, (although what else are you going to do with cake in fairness?).

You need to have a talk with her OP lay your cards out on the table, otherwise you'll just be left scratching your head in limbo.

LegacyUser

She text me just after I posted that saying I love you.

I really just don't know what to say I suppose deep down I know its probly not going to last but there's a chance I could be staying and I fear from the email she doesn't want to continue it if I stay just going along knowing I probly will be gone.

Maybe its in my head I don't know though.

We are both Bi-lingual yes but there is no language barrier there we are both fairly fluent in English too.

niceoneted

Is there any possibility that you can make it work long term.
What are the issues preventing this, culture, where you are both from wanting to return to your respective countries etc., these reasons from preventing something long term may have been the underlying issues to all your arguments. Afraid of losing each other.
I am thinking that you are both mad about each other but not sure how it is going to work long term. She is obviously practical and wants to make the most of it. From my experience of being in love where it has not worked out long term I feel like the experience of having being deeply in love even if it didn't last was a wonderful experience.
A good saying here 'better to have loved and lost than never loved at all'
I wish you the best of luck.

Ickle Magoo

Tbh honest including the sentence "even tho we fight and fight and fight" in any declaration would suggest she is not thinking of the relationship being long-long-term basis as things stand. It sounds more like she accepts you aren't really suited as things are but she cares and wants you both to enjoy the remainder of your time together...it could also be a plea to sort the issues out if you really want the relationship to become healthier and worth keeping even if you leave...

Talk to her, both lay your cards on the table - what have you got to lose?

Best of luck