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Breaking out of a rut?

  • 22-07-2010 9:40pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Lately I've realised that I'm in a complete rut. I'm 31 and in the last year or so, many of my friends have been getting married, having babies etc. etc. While I'm delighted for them, it has, obviously, cut into the time we spend together. While I might wish that they were more available, I'm accepting of the fact that they do have other things going on that are important to them.

    The thing is, I'd love to make some new friends but a few things are stopping me from getting out there and just doing it. The first is probably the biggest (pardon the pun) issue. I am overweight. It's something I'm working on (and oh how I miss chocolate) but it does impact on my confidence. I feel like a lot of people judge me - she's lazy, boring, a slob etc. I am almost braced for the judgement/harsh comment and so I'm not the most open.

    The second is maybe simpler - it's been such a long time since I have made a new friend, I've no clue how to do it! If I do get out there and meet some people, how do I turn it into a friendship. This may sound like a completely stupid question, but I'm being genuine. It seemed so easy in my twenties, but now it does feel as if many people my age have lives that are full. I don't want to come across as a strange and creepy friend stalker :)

    Any advice would be appreciated.


Comments

  • #2
    Zen65
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,630 ✭✭✭Zen65


    in_a_rut wrote: »

    I feel like a lot of people judge me - she's lazy, boring, a slob etc. I am almost braced for the judgement/harsh comment and so I'm not the most open.

    Don't worry about how others may judge; you've already been judged by yourself and you were a bit harsh about it.

    Take action. Tackle that weight problem (if you really have one) and join a group like weightwatchers to help you. This is also a good place to practise making friends (and you seem to be out of practice) safe in the knowledge you won't be judged.

    Join other groups too. There's an Irish web service for bringing people together just for nights out, not a dating thing. I forget the name of the website, but it seems ideal for you.

    Get out, get moving, get meeting people.


    Be at peace,

    Z


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