Is It Possible

LegacyUser

Hi All,

Just wondering if people think its possible for a couple to get back together successfully after being apart for a few years?

I was in a relationship a while back and decided to end it because i didnt think we were the perfect match.

After being apart for 2 yrs now and having been with a few other people im thinking things might not have been that bad afterall.

I am just fooling myself beacuse i havent found anything better or could it work out if we were to get back together.

We always stayed in touch and have remained friendly.

Any thoughts appreviated.

yermandan

It largely depends on the exact reason(s) why you ended it with her. If those reasons are deal-breakers for you and were making you unhappy in the relationship then it is unlikely that they have changed (unless it was something situational like she wasnt ready for commitment or a serious relationship yet)

To be honest it doesnt sound like you really want to be with this girl for who she is, as you said yourself it may be that you just havnt found someone compatible yet and you want to go back to something that might not be exactly what you want out of life but will be somewhat of a 'settle' situation.

So to answer your question, yes of course its possible, but only when both are going back having reconciled the issues that broke them up in the first place.

Be really honest with yourself and her, and best of luck

Ickle Magoo

There usually has to be significant issues to spell the end of a relationship and unless those issues are addressed then the relationship can't be any more successful however many times you try. It sounds like you getting a big fed up with being single or not being in a long-term relationship and are looking back with the old rose-tinted specs.

Write down all the things that motivated you to call time in the first place and see if they are insignificant enough not to bother you this time around. It's not very fair on your ex to mess her around just because not finding anyone else has made you think she wasn't "that bad afterall"...that hardly screams that you realise you made a huge mistake and love her like crazy.

Best of luck.

tbh

unregistered wrote: »

After being apart for 2 yrs now and having been with a few other people im thinking things might not have been that bad afterall.

it was bad enough to break up in the first place, but after two years you don't miss the bad things, only the good things. I'm not saying it's not possible to get back together, but it's like everything viewed with hindsight - always seems easier than it was.

LegacyUser

Thanks for the feedback.

I know what people are saying about looking back, with rose tinted glasses etc.
I ask myself that everyday and still dont know the answer.

Just for some further background the reason i decided to end it previously was mainly due to commitment issues...I was madly in love with her but after 2 years together i just felt she ticked about 8 of 10 boxes for my perfect match.

I just felt at the time that maybe there was someone out there that was my perfect match but now im just torn apart wondering if i made a big mistake and should have concentrated more on the good things than the few bad ones.

Im now at the stage where i could picture us living together but what if it doesnt work out and i end up hurting her all over again....i just couldnt do that to her.

Am i just having these feelings because im now on my own?
Will i reget it if we dont try again.

Why cant things just be straight forward.

tbh

unregistered wrote: »

Am i just having these feelings because im now on my own?

more than likely, but we all get that

Will i reget it if we dont try again.

you'll probably always wonder, but when you meet "the one" you won't wonder as much

Why cant things just be straight forward.

how boring would that be!!

listen, there's lots of great things - and, lets be blunt - crappy things waiting down the line for you. at the moment you're fixing on this one thing so it seems huge, but as you get on with life, it'll become a smaller and smaller detail.