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Too much of a good thing?

  • 14-07-2010 12:35pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    My best friend and I started seeing each other about 2 months ago and even though we never thought of each other as anything more than friends before, I'm reeeally starting to fall for her and I think she's the same...

    The problem is, if we started going out I'd be soo worried we'd have a bad break up and never speak again..She means so much to me as a friend? Also, at college we're in the exact same group of friends, we have the same best friends at home as well, that we meet at weekends and go out with...We're used to spending almost all day every day together, but is that a bad thing if we're in a relationship? And if we break up, it'll put pressure on all of our friends :S

    But I like her soo much, I just don't know if it could work?


Comments

  • #2
    newtothis2010
    Closed Accounts Posts: 45 ✭newtothis2010


    why are you worrying about something that may never happen?

    Life is all about taking risks and I know IF you broke up this could signal the start of a very uncomfortable time for the group, but then again, what if it worked out?

    I've been in the group where a couple broke up in college, similar to your situation, yeah its was difficult for them, but the rest of us stayed out of it, let them get over their differences and life continued on...

    as to the spending too much time together, well if you recognise it might be a problem, take yourself out of the situation once in a while, I imagine the WHOLE group of friends don't have to do everything together every day? so head on out with tom and pat and jane for an evening with out g/f and let her go out with some of the other friends?
    Also being in college, why not join a different group/society to her? gives you an opportunity to meet another group of friends and have something just for you do aswell...

    there are ways around this and since you can't help the way you feel, why not explore it and see where it leads and who knows what could happen? but I wouldn't write it off on the 'off chance' something bad could happen....


  • #3
    422nd
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 855 ✭✭✭422nd


    Don't hesitate. If you both want it, do it! Don't pass up the oppertunity for something amazing.


  • #4
    jurgenscarl
    Closed Accounts Posts: 184 ✭✭jurgenscarl


    You need to make other friends outside of your current group of mates.
    That way if this relationship ends, you can move and not look back.
    But don't be thinking the worst just yet.
    You seem to have got to know her as friends and then things got more serious.
    Go for it and if it doesn't work out what the hell?


  • #5
    dublingal80
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,540 ✭✭✭dublingal80


    go for it

    if you dont you will regret it for ever...... yeah it might not work out, but what if it does?!?


  • #6
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    This is the risk you take in ANY relationship, and if you worried like this before everyone you would stay single for a long long time.

    I second and third what the others are all saying. Go for it, try it out and see where it leads. Life, and relationships are all about taking such risks.

    If her friendship is something that is this important to you then this should not stop you attempting more, but it should make you realise the responsibility of it. Later down the road if things start to not work out remember this. Do not bottle any problems up, but discuss them openly with her and sort them out.

    Break ups do not always have to be bad, but people allow themselves to internalise and ignore problems until the grow to explosive proportions. Just promise yourself from the outset you will never let this happen and I think you can allow yourself go for this relationship safely and maturely.


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