I'm really bad at my job

LegacyUser

Long time contributor to this forum, now I'm the one who needs assistance.

Basically I'm very bad at my job, and this is bothering me. Today my boss kept telling me how many CVs she has and how many people want my job. I used be an educator but because of the R word I'm now working an admin role. It's with an international organisation that a lot of people who give a limb to work for, but I'm so bad at writing reports, taking minutes etc. I hate admin and never want to do it again, but it's the sort of industry that if you do it for a few years you'll get a more interesting job. And this current job would seriously enhance my employment prospects in the future.

On a side note, I really don't think I'm that bad. I circulate what I write to everyone and only my supervisor keeps putting me down, everyone else (including others who are my bosses) think my work is fine. She doesn't seem to want me to do anything in my own style, has to be just as she would do it.

So now I'm thinking do I pack it all in? I'm being sponsored for this by a great organization that I would hate to burn bridges with. My contract is until next year, but I can give 3 weeks notice and go. The recession scares the hell out of me but I think life is too short.

In brief, my question is it normal to feel bad at your job after 2 months? Should I give it another few weeks/months or cut my losses and run? They also gave me a starting bonus which I would have to return, but I haven't spent it yet anyway.

I've seen some people here give great advice in the past, now I would love some please. I've been trying all day not to start crying at my desk, it's good to at least share the story on here.

Sound Bite

OP, there are always going to be others how will put you down in order to make themselves feel better and it looks like this women is doing just that.

Remember the following:

1. It is a recession & if you were that bad, they would have replaced you already. The fact you are still there means you must be going something right.

2. These comments are coming from one individual and one individual only. Again, if you were that bad surely others would have commented by now.

3. You need this job & you deserved this job so don't quit just becuase of one nasty B****.

4. It takes everyone time to settle into a new role. Due to staff shortages, I have taken over a role I'm over qualified in and it still look me a month or two to get to grips with the systems and processes. Simply because I wasn't used to them not because I was no good.

Rise above it, I know its not easy. See the job as a means to an end and nothing more.

George Orwell 1982

Stick with it.

Your boss is lacking people skills. Just try your best to do things her way and keep her happy.

Maybe talk to your work mates. Sound them out about how they feel about things.

Your only two months in the job. You'll get better at your tasks and feel better as time goes on. At least give it six months - looks better on the CV.

mikemac

Your confidence has taken a hit.

If this gets worse, you'll start worrying over everything, checking things needlessly and working excessive hours, it takes a toll.

No matter what job you start it takes time to get up to speed.
Do you have any appraisal meetings coming up, maybe after three months?

If you were poor at your job you'd have been pulled into a meeting or let go by now.
Have belief in yourself, you got the job as you deserve it.

If you're still struggling, maybe ask for a training plan but don't meet your boss one on one, is there a training officer too?

dellas1979

Hmmmm. Could your supervisor have said that in retaliation as they have picked up on your negativeness towards the job?

LegacyUser

Thanks everyone.

No, I have no appraisal meetings, but I am allowed do training so I'm going to try and use that.

Dallas, I really don't think it's because of negativity. I'm very positive in work, and I really try my best. I'm here earlier than anyone else, leave later and rarely take lunch. I'm work constantly and try to be as helpful as possible. I really think she said it regarding the quality of my work. Like, if I can't do it, they've a long list of people who will.

But I will stick it out, I just needed some opinions. Hopefully things will improve. Today I was crying in the morning thinking of coming into work.

I guess it's just bothering me so much because I've never had much of a social and definitely no love life. Work is usually the only thing I'm good at, so as way said, my confidence has taken a hit.

Denerick

badatjob wrote: »

On a side note, I really don't think I'm that bad. I circulate what I write to everyone and only my supervisor keeps putting me down, everyone else (including others who are my bosses) think my work is fine. She doesn't seem to want me to do anything in my own style, has to be just as she would do it.

I really despise people like her from the pit of my heart. She's the kind of person who probably ticked the boxes for the Nazi's at Auchwitz, saying, 'Everything appears to be in order here'.

OP, your boss is a power craven bitch, like most others. Just do what you have to do and grit your teeth. Like most other people.

mikemac

Your boss is a muppet.
Firstly in any decent company, your boss does not have the power to fire you, it's the boss above them who does this.
It's never your immediate boss, at least not in structured large companies.

If there is an issue with the work, there should be a meeting and goals and deadlines are set.
If the OP can't meet them them then meet again and only then do you think about letting staff go.
Unless it's gross negligance or something

To be talking about piles of other applications would shatter anyone's confidence.
Tell anyone they are useless enough times and they'll believe it, stop contributing to meetings and go into their shell which only leads to worse performance

Have I been there?
Check my username

badatjob

badatjob wrote: »

In brief, my question is it normal to feel bad at your job after 2 months? Should I give it another few weeks/months or cut my losses and run? They also gave me a starting bonus which I would have to return, but I haven't spent it yet anyway.

Yeah it's normal, it takes a while to settle in. I felt useless for months at mine, everyone was lovely and helpful and trained me in but there is a lot to get a hang of. I mentioned it at a 1-1 and was told don't worry it's normal takes everyone a while! Next person to join the team felt that way as well, the panicy "oh god will I ever know what they're talking about??"
Give it a few more months and learn as much as you can while you're still new. Your supervisor sounds like an unhappy person don't take it to heart!

dellas1979

I know you are having a hard time and I dont mean this to be rude or insensitive, but in your first post you said you hate admin work and in the second post you said you were crying going into work...people pick up on these things straight away - especially supervisors etc.

You dont think they do - but they do.

Now, as I said above, I am not trying to upset you, but there are reasons why your boss made the "other people want your job" speech.

A few opinions:

1. She doesnt think you are adequate for the job;
2. She doesnt think you care about having the job;
3. You give the impression the job is beneath you/negative towards the job;
4. She doesnt like you personally.

If one of my managers told me that, I would be up to them straight away (in a polite, professional way of course) asking why they made that comment i.e. on what basis/grounds was that comment made. I wouldnt care from adam - I wouldnt have that floating around my head.

As much as you seem intimidated and worried by your supervisor, can you go up to her and ask her why she made that comment. Ask in a nice polite friendly professional manner. You need to make it known to her that you are taking note of what she says.

BumbleB

I would have nipped it in the bud going straight on the defensive exact stats ,figures and occurances to support their claim.Its nearly impossible to be fired in Ireland because you have to go through a lengthy procedure and if youre doing youre job reasonable it just not going to happen. As another poster said the fact that theyre keeping you is ample proof that youre ok because if you were making a dogs of it you would have been moved a long time ago .So in the meantime challenge your boss not aggressively but assertively and keep your self esteem healthy. because if they find a chink in your armour they may start a bulllying process, so be strong ,hang tough....

InReality

Great advice here.
I've nothing to add cept I agree that your boss is being a complete muppet.

Pay as little heed to him/her as you can & start trying to be a little stronger & more assertive in your
dealings with them.

It will get easier to do over time.

Your doing fine.

cat_rant

Hi Op,

I have this suspision right, some people like to push and push and push until they get a reaction. It sounds to me like your boss is the kind of person that given a inch will take a mile. She may be domineering and will only respect you if you can meet her on a level playing feild.

Asertive behaviour can really help with this. Do you make eye contact with your boss when talking to her? Do you stand tall? Do you come across as capable and confident? Does she see you as being invested in your job? Do you contribute constructively?

Some people only know where to step off - when you tell them to. And I don't mean make a scene or cry. Just have faith in your abilities - do your best, learn how to do the things you cant do right now. Be professional , believe in yourself and don't give her the power to make you feel this bad about yourself.

And if you don't feel confident - fake it till you make it baby

Good luck

Emme

BumbleB wrote: »

I would have nipped it in the bud going straight on the defensive exact stats ,figures and occurances to support their claim.Its nearly impossible to be fired in Ireland because you have to go through a lengthy procedure and if youre doing youre job reasonable it just not going to happen. As another poster said the fact that theyre keeping you is ample proof that youre ok because if you were making a dogs of it you would have been moved a long time ago .So in the meantime challenge your boss not aggressively but assertively and keep your self esteem healthy. because if they find a chink in your armour they may start a bulllying process, so be strong ,hang tough....

The first thing I thought when I read the OPs original post was that her boss is bullying her. Getting bullied is part and parcel of most admin jobs - you have to deal with it as professionally as possible and get on with your job. IMHO bullying is an unofficial way of managing admin staff, I have an admin job myself so I know what I'm talking about, I've been bullied in most places where I worked. It's a way of keeping your morale low so you don't think enough of yourself to ask for a raise and thanks to the R word, you will be expected to work all hours and get no overtime pay. If this woman's harassment continues show NO weakness because if you do they'll go in there and try to annihilate you! Keep private written records of all correspondence and times of bullying incidents.

Most people I know in admin roles get bullied. Several admin people in my workplace have been off sick over bullying and some had breakdowns but despite court cases etc. the bullying of admin staff still continues right through the organisation. Ironically enough our workplace is one of the great champions of "anti-bullying campaigns" :rolleyes:. I hate to sound harsh, but you'll have to learn how to deal with the bullying and not let it affect your work.

Eoin

I'm so bad at writing reports, taking minutes etc.

On a side note, I really don't think I'm that bad. I circulate what I write to everyone and only my supervisor keeps putting me down, everyone else (including others who are my bosses) think my work is fine

So perhaps there might be some room for improvement, or is it genuinely a case that you're doing everything right but not the way she wants it done?

I sympathise with people who hate going into work, but in many cases there are some elements that are under their control (not to mention two sides to a story). Have you asked your supervisor to sit down and go through what you can do to meet expectations?

feelingstressed wrote: »

Your boss is a muppet.
Firstly in any decent company, your boss does not have the power to fire you, it's the boss above them who does this.
It's never your immediate boss, at least not in structured large companies.

You can't make blanket statements like that, there are so many variables involved. If it's a vague "team lead" role, then maybe they can't fire you. But I can assure you that in every company I've worked (ranging from small companies to large multinationals) that my immediate boss would most definitely have had the authority to let me go. If you're on probation then it's easier again.

mudbath142

hi,

straight away from your title I can tell you are been bullied. No one should be told this kind of stuff 2 months into a job - its incredible she is getting away with this but I've been there.

First, if you are underperforming (and i'm not so sure you are), your boss should be supporting you and providing training if necessary.

In my situation (several years ago now), I was on a contract so was in a weak position. She didn't like me from the off and straight away was commenting on my poor communications in emails (this is despite having successfully completed a postgrad in Technical communication!). Several colleagues told me it was bullying but upper management did not want to know about it. She was recently promoted into the job and was out to mark her territory. I produced all the facts which showed that I was up to speed with work and never received any criticism from the external people we were working with and sent them to upper management - no response. It was all based on her opinion. Talk about circling wagons.

Anyway, its hard to see how it will improve. As another poster said, keep a record of everything in case you want to go do that route (i didn't).

Best of luck and keep the chin up.