Have you ever moved to a new city alone?

Savannah100

Hi all!

I'm new here so forgive me if this is in the wrong place (mods, feel free to move this post!).

Has anyone here moved to a new town, city or even country not knowing a single person there? What was the experience like? Did you meet people quickly?

I have an opportunity to move to a city where I know absolutely no-one and I don't know whether I would be able to settle in. I'm in my early twenties and have no main reason to stay where I am. I'm just worried about making new friends and where to start in going about it.

So, has anyone else been in a similar situation?!

Celly Smunt

yep,still live in kitchener and i'm really young ,go for it if it doesn't work Fúck it you still have somewhere to come back with,the worst that can ever happen is you'll die,and to die would be an awfully big adventure

liah

Hah, Kitchener.. you poor thing.

Yep, I have, when I came here I didn't know a soul. Moving soon to somewhere I only know one person, and even then only just..

Terrifying but you learn too much from it to not do it.

Celly Smunt

liah wrote: »

Hah, Kitchener.. you poor thing.

Yep, I have, when I came here I didn't know a soul. Moving soon to somewhere I only know one person, and even then only just..

Terrifying but you learn too much from it to not do it.

well its more waterloo

liah

pmcmahon wrote: »

well its more waterloo

:eek:

Even worse..

Celly Smunt

liah wrote: »

Even worse..

come on! we have the clubs,the big amazing clubs :P

Barna77

Yes.

'nough said

starlit

yes I have! twice in fact! lived in dublin city and cork city! now back in kerry...
ah dublin was grand got to know people while at work but had a few people i knew living in dublin anyway but didn't know anybody in cork city though until I moved down there to study. Got to meet most people while in college and going out. Experience was better in cork than in dublin but enjoyed the nightlife and bustle of both cities! maybe moving to a new town might suit you better, you like the country or the town life?

alwaysadub

Yep, moved to Galway without really knowing anyone here. Best thing i ever did.

Go for it OP!

iii Stevo iii

Work and housemates are your key to settling in. You cant really pick your workmates but you can be picky when choosing a house. Don't just jump at the first nice house you see, make sure you get along with the housemates first!

dreamers75

Did it twice, lonely as **** for a while but ultimatley best things i ever did.

You will meet people but sometimes in desperation you will meet dickheads ( i met loads) meh im old now i know this now

vicecreamsundae

yeah i moved to toronto all by myself, and it was awesome. the first couple weeks could be a bit boring/lonely at times, but then i went to see a couple of bands i like, and met people there, and got invited to a houseparty and met looaaaads of people. go for it!
it's probably easy to meet people even sooner, if you put the effort into joining clubs and stuff.

belongtojazz

Yep, i've done it a few times, my advice would be to take any and all offers to socialise even if you don't think the person inviting you is really you're cup of tea, their friends might be

It is a great chance to reinvent yourself into the person you want to be rather than the person everyone currently around you thinks you are.

Good luck

Red Hand

Yeah, have moved to 5 different cities/towns whilst working. It's worked out alright.

Flojo

I kinda moved to Galway alone.. "kinda" because I moved here with a girl I didn't know that well! But after meeting loads of awesome people already and turns out it was probably the best decision I've ever made.

SoulTrader

Yeah I did it - moved to a new country 3 and a half years ago, without knowing a soul here. I'm still here, and met my wife here too. It's important to acknowledge in advance that the first few months might be tough, but no matter what, give it a least a few months before you decide if you want to stay / go.

If it's just another city within Ireland you're moving to, go for it! Home is always just a drive away. Good luck.

I_AmThe_Walrus

I say, go for it. I moved to Amsterdam at 20 and came home a year later. Not that I had any specific intentions in choosing Holland...

Anywho...nothing quite like the experience. It's better to go and say no, it's not for you, than to sit down and regret not taking the chance when it came along.

tommyhaas

It'l be fine, just voice some non PC/facist views publicly and in no time you'll be well known. You'll even get to know a lot of like minded people and get invited to all sorts of intimate rallies/protests/lynchings. Hell if it goes well you might even make a name for yourself!

southsiderosie

Multiple times, both in my home country and abroad. I actually found it easier to meet people as a foreigner, since there are so many other foreigners who are just as lost and confused, you are more likely to want to be social to "soak it all in" (and a lot of locals like foreign chicks ). As an American, moving to Europe was easier for me than moving to Miami, and Dublin I think has been my easiest move of all, at home or abroad.

captainjack

I'm 22 and just moved to Mexico on me lonesome.

Came for the adventure, a chance to pick up some Spanish but mainly just to see if I was up to it.

Week 3/4 were tough, after the initial novelty of being here wore off and I was lost in a totally different environment with no one to help and none of the language.

But fcuk it, some laugh to be had and you will be glad you did it!

OP, where are you maybe going?

Rabies

Ya. Done it a few years ago.
Still here. NZ is my home.

Overheal

liah wrote: »

Hah, Kitchener.. you poor thing.

Yep, I have, when I came here I didn't know a soul. Moving soon to somewhere I only know one person, and even then only just..

Terrifying but you learn too much from it to not do it.

You cheated though. You found boards before you flew over. Someone already set up you the bomb ffs.

The Highwayman

Yeah Germany lived there for 3 years. No German when I went. Picked it up in a year

Miss Fluff

Yep, first few weeks/months can be lonely and tough while you find your feet but you should 100% go fo for it:)

bluto63

Moved to London. My brother was in the city, but the complete opposite side which took 2 hours to see him, so couldn't socialise with his friends, had to find my own. Best decision I ever made, I'm a completely different person because of it and I've never once looked back. If you get the chance OP, take it. You won't regret it. Even if you find it difficult, it'll be worth it in the end.

ilovebiology

Savannah100 wrote: »

Hi all!

I'm new here so forgive me if this is in the wrong place (mods, feel free to move this post!).

Has anyone here moved to a new town, city or even country not knowing a single person there? What was the experience like? Did you meet people quickly?

I have an opportunity to move to a city where I know absolutely no-one and I don't know whether I would be able to settle in. I'm in my early twenties and have no main reason to stay where I am. I'm just worried about making new friends and where to start in going about it.

So, has anyone else been in a similar situation?!

Yep I have, and got on grand. Will do it again, and am looking forward to it, will be the other side of the world next time though!

sam34

three times in the last three years, thanks to work.

teaches you independence and self-sufficiency

biko

Aye, I have. More than once actually. Can be tough but just stay positive and it'll work out fine.

More PI than AH.

Savannah100

Thanks for all your feedback everyone!

Well, the city I would be moving to is Galway and I'm from the south so I guess it's not too far if I need to run home!

Although now everyone here seems to have such good experiences moving alone even to other countries, that I may actually consider that. I'd love to go to Canada or somewhere.

I realise now that I would absolutely learn far more about myself and probably be a better person after it!

I'm gonna do it.....I think!

Saibh

There is a region forum (which covers home and aboard) - you might find some information on the area you are going to.

Firetrap

Yes, have done myself. A great way I found myself was to move into a house with some others who were around my age. They became friends (still are friends) and through them I met their friends. And so on. It suited me because I'm shy enough and find it hard to just start chatting to randomers.

liah

Overheal wrote: »

You cheated though. You found boards before you flew over. Someone already set up you the bomb ffs.

I didn't! I arrived in Ireland Sept. 1st, 2008 (actually left Canada August 31st). My join date-- Sep 2008

Dinkie

Did it in Melbourne (3 years) and Reading (2 years), Dublin (2 years) and now Wexford where I know very few people

Actualy finding WExford the hardest place, but that is more because of my job which means I travel a lot.

Go for it. Going some where alone means you make more of an effort, and you get to know people you wouldn't normally meet and experience places and events you wouldn't normally.

Somebody mentioned earlier that flatmates are a big factor in settling down. +1 on that. Really make sure you have sociable friendly flatmates. You can always move somewhere on your own once you have made the friends.

Yep, moved to Belgium last year for a year. Went over with no job, no house and knowing nobody but a friend of a friend who was always busy working. I won't lie and say I was deliriously happy but I had some health issues and my boyfriend was across the world, but overall it was absolutely fine. I made several groups of friends, got a job, took language classes at night, travelled around the country. It's a pretty cool feeling arriving with your suitcase and thinking 'S**T, what have I done?' as you look around and realise this is your new country. You get a 'novelty high' for a few weeks and it can get tough when that wears off, but I rode it out and settled in well in the end.

And make sure you have nice flatmates. I lived with a horrible bitch and it really soured everything for me. I ended up in a situation where it would have been perfect if I'd lived with nice people so it was annoying.

freakmagnet

I'll be doing this soon myself. I have some expereince of a slightly different thing (travelling for extended periods on my own).

I'm just wondering about accommodation. I can see the advantage of going into a house with housemates - but house shares are such a tricky thing to get right! They could be the making OR the breaking...

Has anyone any experience of getting their OWN place in their new city..? Or is that really cutting off your nose to spite your face?

captainjack

freakmagnet wrote: »

I'll be doing this soon myself. I have some expereince of a slightly different thing (travelling for extended periods on my own).

I'm just wondering about accommodation. I can see the advantage of going into a house with housemates - but house shares are such a tricky thing to get right! They could be the making OR the breaking...

Has anyone any experience of getting their OWN place in their new city..? Or is that really cutting off your nose to spite your face?

Do you mean living alone in a different city?

Overheal

liah wrote: »

I didn't! I arrived in Ireland Sept. 1st, 2008 (actually left Canada August 31st). My join date-- Sep 2008

well lets face it nobody out there does it like boards. if i had moved to Dublin and not SC I'd be set right now. But i didnt

Jenneke87

Yep. When I was twenty I moved from The Netherlands to Dublin without knowing a single sould or ever visited the country before. I have a brilliant two years(one in Dublin, on in county Clare) and I´d do it all again tomorrow if I could. The most important thing is that whereever you end up you go out and meet new people to prevent yourself from ending up lonely and miserable.

freakmagnet

captainjack wrote: »

Do you mean living alone in a different city?

Yes - i'll be moving city (within Ireland) - and just wondering what peoples thoughts are - get my own place or move into a house? I'm just wondering, from those of you who did move cities, how did you work it? The advantages and disadvantages are naturally obviously - just wondering from those who did move cities, what was your primary way of meeting people and was housemates one of them...?

Hersheys

Move into a house - easiest way to get to know people and get good local knowledge. Ask for a short term lease and you can leave if you hate it, but you'll hopefully have a good experience and maybe even make friends with your new housemates.

Blarney92

Just moved to a new city (outside ireland) 4 weeks ago for work completely on my own. Great experience so far- my advice would be to always take people up on their offers to socialise. Be it a few drinks after work, going to the park for a picnic, going to a concert or just chatting to someone where you meet them rather than just saying hello and then leaving straight away

Don't just hide away in your house or wherever you're staying. Get out there and see what its like.

whirlpool

I moved on my own to London for three months. I cried for most of the first week. I think it was the most down I've ever felt. I felt like I was in hell.

The positive thing about it is that the next time I move to a strange city, I won't find it so difficult at the start, coz I've done it once before.

OP, good luck with the move!

Copper23

I've moved to a new city and then I moved country.

I've loved both.

Both are scary but I just thought that like you I'm in my early 20's and I have the oppertunity.

Home will always be home and I feel I will always return there but I hope to have a long life. In your early twenties its worth a shot to experience it.

In my case I had a job for a year somewhere and gave it a go, it worked out great, I was lucky to meet lots of people in work to socialse with and stuff.

I moved country on a 3 year visa the same job gave me the oppertunity. My aim was to stay the 3 years, by then I will be in my later twenties. If I love it here, I can stay longer, if I really don't then it will ahve been a great experience and I will never look back in regret of what if's and I will still be young enough to come back home and not miss out on much.

Having said that, right now things are great and I'm loving it.

There will definitely be times you'll miss home, and friends and family. Remember its always easy to visit and if it ever gets too much you can move home if you really want to. Just also remember you have plenty time to move home later on once you've experienced whatever it is you are doing so enjoy it.

It's scary not knowing anyone but you get what you put into it.

Do your best with possibly room mates, neighbours, work collegues and it'll work out. Try not to be too shy or closed off the meeting people. I found being from somewhere different is much easier to make friends. People are usually more accepting you are new there and will make a little more effort initially with you. Sometimes at home its harder to make friends as people just assume everyone has their own friends already.

I'm rambling, in short, go for it.

beccabeccabecca

Savannah100 wrote: »

Well, the city I would be moving to is Galway and I'm from the south so I guess it's not too far if I need to run home!

I'm from the southeast and moved up to Galway to go to college last year without knowing a soul. The first few weeks were very tough - I'm naturally a quiet person and really felt the stress of constantly putting myself out there to meet new people. I used to get caught on the accent and local expressions a lot as well; had no idea what to do when someone was telling me they were pure thick about this and that :pac:. However, after those few weeks I was flying. I love the city and I have a solid group of friends there. I'm at home for the summer now and I can't wait to go back up in September.

One thing I would say though is be very careful with how you choose your housemates. Three of the girls I ended up living with were absolute nightmares. The fourth was a star though and we're getting our own place with two others I got to know since moving up next year.

tl;dr: Go for it!

Trier

Yes i have and i would do it again. I've been a bit of a fleeer in the past though so very different from you. It's now that i'm back home that all is tougher for me. I love changing places and starting anew and always on a better foot with all the things i've learnt and acquired in my previous experiences in another city/abroad.
I love the feeling of travelling even more than that of being somewhere, so very different again but what i want to say is you can see it as a fantastic opportunity. Any different places influences you and make you a better person, a more open-minded one who knows more about what ()he can achieve, more confident, independant and self-sufficient. It's a fantastic challenge to go in a new city and do your best starting from scratch. Where nobody knows you, so even if they're not your friend (yet) they don't know your bad aspects either, they don't know if you were previously shy/popular/, maybe if you had met in another city/other cirumstances you wouldn't even have paid attention to each other, befriended them etc..I see it as an opportunity to be a better you, to get my ass in gear and really respect those resolutions we all take before a new start.

If you see this blank page as an opportunity rather than as something super scary to overcome, you can gain a lot from the experience and have a very rewarding and successful new life.

Seize the opportunity i'd say!