Chimpanzees found making sex toys

christ on a bike!

It turns out that humans aren't the only animals that occasionally need a little help in the bedroom. According to the New York Times, researchers have discovered wild chimpanzees spicing up their love lives by creating sex toys. That's right: sex toys.




When Jane Goodall originally discovered toolmaking in chimpanzees back in 1960, the finding rocked the human world. No longer could humans draw a firm line between themselves and other animals based upon their use of tools. Now with this new discovery, it looks as though toolmaking rocks the chimp world, too.

So what exactly is the tool? Are chimps using vines for bondage? Strap-on branches? Does it involve bananas?

Well, no. It's something more subtle than that. The tool, explains University of Cambridge primatologist William C. McGrew, is a leaf. "The male will pluck a leaf, or a set of leaves, and sit so the female can see him. He spreads his legs so the female sees the erection, and he tears the leaf bit by bit down the midvein of the leaf, dropping the pieces as he detaches them. Sometimes he’ll do half a dozen leaves until she notices."

It may seem like a crude, creepy version of "she loves me, she loves me not," but according to McGrew, the sound of a raspy leaf is, for a chimpanzee, more like the equivalent of a Marvin Gaye song. Or at least, it's enough to grab her attention and advertise his advances.

"Presumably she sees the erection and puts two and two together, and if she’s interested, she’ll typically approach and present her back side, and then they’ll mate," said McGrew.

So far, raspy leaf fetishes have only been witnessed among a single colony of chimps in Tanzania, so the unusual behavior is as much an indication of cultural evolution in chimpanzee society as it is an example of tool use.

Interestingly, the discovery may even help shed light on the long baffling, unexplained evolution of the human teenage phenomenon known as "cruising", or driving around town with car speakers blaring. Young human males may feel vindicated knowing that a similarly obnoxious tactic appears to actually work for chimpanzee males.

Link here


Tl;dr - When a male chimp has an erection he sits in front of a female chimp and tears up a leaf dropping the pieces onto his throbbing pride (though it should be noted that the human penis is proportinately the biggest of all primates :cool:)
The sound of the leaves tearing is like Marvin Gaye so they hop on the good foot and do the bad thing

Would such a tactic work for humans? And if not then darn it, what does work!?

scudzilla

Now you've gone onto chimp sex, here's one for ya

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qVE60zwXx1k

DerekDGoldfish

(though it should be noted that the human penis is proportinately the biggest of all primates )

speak for yourself

Let the aping begin.

Mr. Presentable

scudzilla wrote: »

Now you've gone onto chimp sex, here's one for ya

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qVE60zwXx1k

I am fascinated to know what you were researching when you found that!

Deus Ex Machina

Am I the only one who thinks that these mating rituals are more pleasant than those of humans?

Banned Account

disappointed - thought they had been employed in a factory in africa making rabbits for ann summers.

m5ex9oqjawdg2i

scudzilla wrote: »

Now you've gone onto chimp sex, here's one for ya

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qVE60zwXx1k

What the fcuk???

christ on a bike!

Deus Ex Machina wrote: »

Am I the only one who thinks that these mating rituals are more pleasant than those of humans?

You really think that!? I can think of anything more beautiful or natural as plying a member of the opposite sex with barcardi breezers before a quick knee trembler in an alleyway.
I oft times hear Attenborough narrating the beauty of this ritual in my imagination

kylith

How the the hell did the chimp learn how to do that?

DerekDGoldfish wrote: »

speak for yourself

DDG! Fancy meeting you here!

Nodin

christ on a bike! wrote: »

You really think that!? I can think of anything more beautiful or natural as plying a member of the opposite sex with barcardi breezers before a quick knee trembler in an alleyway.
I oft times hear Attenborough narrating the beauty of this ritual in my imagination

'.....the mating over, the female rearranges her hair, before seeking out the other females of the group, to exchange looks, and ask for baby wipes....'

DerekDGoldfish

kylith wrote: »

How the the hell did the chimp learn how to do that?



DDG! Fancy meeting you here!

I was here since 2003 (or at least my old account was), I just had to re-join when I heard there was a thread about chimp sex toys

Mr. Presentable

Marcelo Fast Vehemence wrote: »

What the fcuk???

Frog.

Didn't you read it?

Fitzcaraldo

Fitzcaraldo wrote: »

disappointed - thought they had been employed in a factory in africa making rabbits for ann summers.

ditto

i feel stoopid

Prof.Badass

christ on a bike! wrote: »

Link here


Tl;dr - When a male chimp has an erection he sits in front of a female chimp and tears up a leaf dropping the pieces onto his throbbing pride (though it should be noted that the human penis is proportinately the biggest of all primates :cool:)
The sound of the leaves tearing is like Marvin Gaye so they hop on the good foot and do the bad thing

Would such a tactic work for humans? And if not then darn it, what does work!?

Do the people who wrote that article even know what a sex toy is?

Because that just sounds like a mating ritual.......


The chimp in scudzilla's video manages to fit the headline better than anything in the article :rolleyes:.

DublinWriter

What's chimpanzee for 'I swear this never happened to me before'?

christ on a bike!

Fitzcaraldo wrote: »

disappointed - thought they had been employed in a factory in africa making rabbits for ann summers.

Thread title is slightly misleading in fairness, it was the title of the article and I thought about changing it but then I thought 'f*ck it, let them be disappointed'

DublinWriter

..or, it's not me, it's you-OO-OO-OO.

Sorry, long day.

Nodin

DublinWriter wrote: »

What's chimpanzee for 'I swear this never happened to me before'?

'Yer brother? No, I never met him....'

LowOdour

hmmm, interesting. Might give this a try myself later, see how the missus reacts. Now to find me some leaves...think ive some lettuce in the fridge

steddyeddy

were supposed to be the most highly sexed of the apes!

Nodin

No, thats Bonobos














(Not a nightclub)

Cookie_Monster

Frogs eh?

/heads to petshop

Executive Steve

christ on a bike! wrote: »

I oft times hear Attenborough narrating the beauty of this ritual in my imagination

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LNOAJvtWqYA

steddyeddy

Nodin wrote: »

No, thats Bonobos











(Not a nightclub)

i dont mean have sex the most i mean our body is most evolved for our sexual desires, no hair makes for better sex given that its flesh against flesh

Bit of a loose definition of sex toy.. Ya might aswell say perfume is a sex toy since it's used to attract mates.

Banned Account

LowOdour wrote: »

hmmm, interesting. Might give this a try myself later, see how the missus reacts. Now to find me some leaves...think ive some lettuce in the fridge

Thank fcuk for the last part of that post - I thought you were going to look for frogs.

Pherekydes

Deleted User wrote: »

Bit of a loose definition of sex toy.. Ya might aswell say perfume is a sex toy since it's used to attract mates.

Bonobos do actually make sex toys. They take the stem of a certain plant and shape it until they can fit it in, if you know what I mean, and then flick it back and forth.

AnonoBoy

christ on a bike! wrote: »

Tl;dr - When a male chimp has an erection he sits in front of a female chimp and tears up a leaf dropping the pieces onto his throbbing pride

I can't take anyone seriously who refers to an erection as his 'throbbing pride'.

Sea Sharp

When the female is interested she presents her ass.

A bit like coppers.

PeterIanStaker

First we had bats giving each other head, now chimps with sex toys.

I think the male hippo, who uses his tail to flick sh!te everywhere in order to attract females, could get the "least subtle" award. Kinda like having too much aftershave:)

Abrasax

scudzilla wrote: »

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qVE60zwXx1k

'Durex frogs; Ribbit for your pleasure'.

Dr Strange

scudzilla wrote: »

Now you've gone onto chimp sex, here's one for ya

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qVE60zwXx1k

"You have a pretty mouth"