Unemployed and starting to go mad!

job123

Been unemployed for four months now and while I expected it to be bad, I didn’t thing it would be this bad.
I’m not even getting interviews for jobs that I am more than qualified for, and I’m getting real frustrated now, where to the point I’m struggling to get out of bed and starting to say what’s the point in firing off applications etc.
Some friends have been good, but overall I feel very detached from people, even my family who all work in sectors where the concept of unemployment is alien.
Life is going on for everyone, holidays, cars, weddings etc and I’m stuck here, great, I can get fit and ‘do things’ that I never had time to do but at the end of the day, you are what you do and earn in this life, (especially as a man!)...
I’m at the stage now where I’m asking what’s the point to everything, getting up, getting dressed, applying for jobs, meeting friends...
I’m even finding it irritating being among friends, and the chat about their lives, their jobs, their plans etc...Its my problem, not there’s..
It’s a bad way to be but I’ve become very cynica l about the country and the fact that ability, talent and qualifications have nothing to do with anything and it seems to be who you know/related to/who you play GAA with...people who take/took risks, tried less conventional careers are the ones getting screwed
Last few days was thinking should I give myself a deadline, and am starting to think I may have to go abroad...I’m the first one in my family ever on the dole and I feel like a right failure..I know people will say stick with it, and keep getting fit, doing stuff and applying for jobs but when do you cut your losses and look abroad?
How does one even start to look abroad?!
How long are people typically out of work, also seeing a woman who I like and having met her friends, and when they ask..’what do you do’...and the answer being not a whole lot..I’m starting to wonder should I pull the plug on that. Too....feel like everyone else is on another planet to me..
Anyone been in my shoes, appreciate their help.
Thanks.

LegacyUser

hi there,

i'm in exactly the same position as you are....except i don't have the option of going abroad - simply because i don't have the money to do it! I don't know what advice to give to you, only to TRY and keep busy - which i know is so hard because the days seem endless when you have all that free time on your hands.

as for the relationship thing, well i was exactly the same as you, met a great girl, she was in a steady job, good prospects etc and i got so insecure and embarrassed about not working that i actually ended up dreading going out with her friends. i didn't pull the plug on it, but needless to say, feeling like that, plus all the free time to think and over analyze EVERYTHING, the relationship didn't work - EVEN THOUGH she actually didn't have a problem with me not working! it was all in my head!

same thing with my friends, i've lost contact with most of them, because i couldnt afford to do the normal things we used to do.....

i know what you're going through and believe me, there are plenty of people in the same boat as you, so just TRY and keep positive. If you have the cash to head off for a while though, why not?!

gagiteebo

Guys I was in exactly the same position. Recession hit hard and I was unemployed for over 3 months, I sent away what felt like hundreds of CVs and I have a damn good CV too but a lot of places didn't even bother replying to say thanks, but no thanks...very frustrating but that's normal!
Wasn't getting any interviews up until last week, got 3 and I managed to secure a job out of it. I feel more relieved than anything but I know how you both are feeling. I was irritable all the time, cranky, really was beginning to think I was losing it completely and took it out on people around me.

What I want to say though is don't give up. At times it feels like there is no hope out there but there is believe me! Keep trying, don't like the rejections or knock backs stop you, dust yourself off and keep on going, for your own sake and sanity. OP getting fit etc is a great idea and it occupies your mind too. If you have the money to go abroad then do it! The start of a new adventure. Don't worry about the girls etc for now, when you get back to your old self all that will fall into place again, trust me

Keep the faith lads!

Ever2010

Op - no harm in checking out jobs abroad online, even London - you can fly over for an interview or request a phone interview.

I've been off for nearly 7 months now and have been really enjoying it. I've learned loads of new skills, started growing veg, read a million books, visited galleries, baked cakes and had mates over to eat them!

I now feel like when I go back to work I will have much much more of a work-life balance. Have you thought about re-training or will your industry pick up again?