Corporate Red Tape/Bureaucracy that drives you nuts

CrazyRabbit

In either you current job, or in a past job, what was the most insane 'Red tape' or bureaucracy that you ever had to put up with?

I work in a large multinational, and regularly deploy new server-based applications.
In the EMEA region (Europe, Middle East & Africa), I only have to:

1. Give the owner name and the application code to the server team.
2. They deploy it.
3. Total time = 1-2 days. Cost = €358

However, if I make the exact same request in US or Asia Pacific Region, I have to:

1. Answer 87 questions on a form in a slow Deployment Request website. All questions are riddled with 'Business speak' terminology, or legal terms.
2. Complete and attach several digital multi-page 'compliance' forms.
3. Duplicate the request in a 'change' tool.
4. Get 4 levels of approval from people in 3 widely different time zones.
5. Pay to have the code checked by a technical reviewer who is less qualified than the people who actually wrote the code.
6. Wait up to 2 weeks for a change window to schedule the change.
7. Update the Deployment Request website with the deployed server details etc.
8. Total time = 4-5 weeks. Cost = €2650

Drives me nuts that the same company can have two very widely different processes for the exact same task.

Zzippy

Know what you mean bud. Having to go to the dole office to get me scratcher drives me fuckin' nuts. I mean, there's blokes livin it up in Poland gettin' it paid into their bleedin' bank accounts, and claimin' childers allowance for 16 kids, and you don't see them havin' to queue up, do ya?
















*I am neither on the dole nor xenophobic, but this is AH, innit?

Banned Account

I sometimes have to ask girls for ID before i have sex with them.

AnonoBoy

Instead of just "What you want?" I used to say all this nonsense:

"Hi there, how are you today?"
"Can I interest you in any of our new salad ranges?"
"Would you like to super-size that for only 25c extra?
"Would you like fries with that?"
"What beverage would you like today?"
"Thank you come again."


Needless to say I didn't last long in Footlocker.

jimmycrackcorm

I've beenn looking for this elusive red tape everywhere but none of the usual shops stock it

Archeron

jimmycrackcorm wrote: »

I've beenn looking for this elusive red tape everywhere but none of the usual shops stock it

Try the sex shops, but make sure you dont cover your nose and mouth at the same time.

Also Starring LeVar Burton

Having to write up lesson plans as some sort of proof that you've tought the curriculum - eh how about just ask the damn kids a bloody question and see if they know they answer... If they do, my job is done...

It's why I decided to give up teaching and become a stand-up comedian instead... I can still teach things, do it in a humourous manner, and not have to fill out any f*cking paperwork...

ScumLord

You shouldn't have to fill out more than one form for anyone in this day and age.

Krieg

This is a common one between engineering/tech dept vs finance dept. I have seen it in every factory I've worked in.

- A critical machine breaks down, luckily we have the necessary spare part
- Machine is fixed and we need to order another spare.
- Purchase order sent to finance dept.
- Finance reject the order, "it costs too much".
- We explain that without the spare and the machine breaks down again, we're all ****ed.
- Battle rages goes on for a few weeks until a member of senior mgmt tells finance to put the order in.

This wouldn't be so bad if it only happened once, but when it happens nearly every month, you start to question if the company really needs a finance dept.