What the hell should i do

LegacyUser

Òk guys, long time reader first time poster........

Basically I started seeing a girl a while back, now i was after her before but just became friends in passing, as in would chat like mad when we would see each other about college, so i gave up on the hunt but then one night about five months ago we ended kissing in the club. We said we would keep it casual as she is heading away for 9mths in sept for college to a diff country. Now the thing is it got more than just casual, i was over in hers alot maybe four to five times a week, mainly at her request. Now shes on holidays for a month, half it down already but i have been seriously missing her! She has rang me twice and we have kept in contact as much as we can.

Now i have been in relationships before and i have never felt like this, its wierd, i really want her, but at the same time i do not want to hold her back.....

I just wants some guidance on where to go with this, or hear stories of if people have been in a similar situation. she is home for a month at christmas, and i have just finished college so would be able to travel to see her maybe twice in the time she is away.

What are peoples thoughts??

Thanks Boardsies

KasandraRose

Well, you can do 1 of 2 things....

1) Ignore your feelings because you feel like you would be "holding her back". If you do that, you have to potential of truly regretting it for the rest of your life. Regret is one of the worst feels!

OR

2) Spill your heart out to her and tell her how you feel. See what she says in response and go from there. Now be prepared that she may say "no" and you could potentially be hurt. But isn't it worth a shot if you really do have those strong feelings for her???

If it were me, I say #2 - and that's based off personal experience.

LegacyUser

thanks for the reply....

i think your right in that i will have to tell her how i feel, but its just a question of how to keep it real and how to keep the emotional contact while she is away....it is the first time i have ever wanted to work at somethin this hard....i have come to the conclusion that i will be able to tell the strength of our connection when she returns when we first meet, like if there is a major spark and all that. when she left first for her holls she was crying like no tommoro and she could hardly talk! i was a bit blown back as it was this point it clicked how much i had fallen for her. im emotionally retarded in most respects to be honest so at a complete loss how to deal with this or what to do!

SinchoE

To be honest it sounds like she feels the same, I've certainly never wanted to see a guy 5 times a week or cried when leaving him if it was just casual. 9 months isn't at all long so just tell her how you feel. The fact that you don't want to hold her back says a lot about the kinda guy you are and I'm sure if she wants to the relationship will last the seperation. Good luck!

LegacyUser

What the hell should i do wrote: »

Òk guys, long time reader first time poster........

Basically I started seeing a girl a while back, now i was after her before but just became friends in passing, as in would chat like mad when we would see each other about college, so i gave up on the hunt but then one night about five months ago we ended kissing in the club. We said we would keep it casual as she is heading away for 9mths in sept for college to a diff country. Now the thing is it got more than just casual, i was over in hers alot maybe four to five times a week, mainly at her request. Now shes on holidays for a month, half it down already but i have been seriously missing her! She has rang me twice and we have kept in contact as much as we can.

Now i have been in relationships before and i have never felt like this, its wierd, i really want her, but at the same time i do not want to hold her back.....

I just wants some guidance on where to go with this, or hear stories of if people have been in a similar situation. she is home for a month at christmas, and i have just finished college so would be able to travel to see her maybe twice in the time she is away.

What are peoples thoughts??

Thanks Boardsies

Hey OP,

You have to tell her how you feel! its the only thing to do and then see how she reacts.

I was in your situation a few years ago, met someone that I was crazy about but wasnt sure what interest he had in me. We kissed one night, kept things casual and over the next five months, saw each other about four or five days a week... I was falling crazy in love with him that summer but I was going abroad for my Erasmus in september and really wasnt sure how he felt. Just before i left we actually talked about how we felt and he felt the same. I did my erasmus and moved away for six months. he was in college but came over three times and i came home three times... totally workable! and we picked up right where we left off when i came back, We were both completely faithful to each other.. and stayed together for five years after! It didnt work out in the end but you need to be honest with her and tell her how you feel! if its meant to be, then it will!

sara-lou

Go for it! I think if you feel that strongly for her then say it even if she doesn't want to go further with it. You d sound like you are very thoughtful and not emotionally retarded. If she wants to give it a go then the time you are apart is a great time for you to work at your emotional issues, long distance is tough but it is one of the toughest tests. Regrets last a lifetime