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Throwing away opportunities... Burn out?

  • 10-06-2010 4:23pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Hi, I'm a regular poster here and I hope I don't give myself away here but anyways...

    Just a bit of background...

    I graduated from college last year with top marks in the college and one national awards etc. I done extremely well in college for a person that was only average in the leaving cert. The reason for this, is I found my passion in life before I began in college and became obsessed with it and worked really hard throughout college. I loved it so much. I just kept going and going. Everyone were worried about me but it didn't bother me at the time. I think it is after catching up however.

    Now I cannot say too much specific but the long story short is I got several really attractive opportunities lately and I've turned them all away. I'm currently in job now that is very good, so flexible but I've lost all interest in the work (which I would once have loved). I go in late and leave early these days only because I can get away with it. I've completely lost motivation in the work I used to love. I'm feel sick with guilt lately. I'm the kind of person, that if they don't have a proper output of the day, something done worth while, I get depressed. The last 3 - 4 months have been a disaster. I've done nothing.

    It's got to the point now that I went in today at 10 and left at 2 and drove far far away for no reason. Just to get away from life I guess.

    The opportunities I've thrown away could have no doubt made me or set me on the path to become a millionaire. Money however is no longer an incentive for me to work. I've plain and simply just lost motivation.

    I'm feeling guilty in the sense, that I'm letting myself down. I'm letting others down. I should be grateful for what I'm getting but I think I'm just burned out from the previous 5 years. I never really took a holiday in the last 5 years and I always worked about 15 hours a day. I was a workaholic. I now think this is after catching up with me big time.

    - I've lost interest in my passion in life. (I should be loving the work I'm getting, but I feel sick thinking of it now!)
    - I thought this was a temporary thing but it's going on for the past 3 - 4 months now and I think I need to do something before I destroy my life.
    - I'm constantly feeling weak both physically and mentally. I'm finding it depressing to get up each day. I just want the day to end so I can go back to bed at night.
    - I feel like I want to isolate myself, I'm constantly finding myself going to the middle of no where. I've started avoiding my family also. I don't know why.


    I just don't feel happy anymore. I'm afraid to take a long break or quit my job as I might regret it. There are numerous things just adding up now and I feel I cannot take it anymore.

    I've got friends but my real close ones are no longer around. I don't talk to anyone about it. I simply just say I'm lazy to other people now when they question me. But there's a lot more to it than that.

    I don't know what's wrong with me, it's the first time something like this has happened me and I'm very worried.


    I don't expect anyone to diagnose anything as that's not allowed but I just felt I needed to say it to someone. Just to let it out. Maybe others were in a similar boat.


    Thank you.


Comments

  • #2
    Taltos
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,830 ✭✭✭✭Taltos


    OP

    suggest you go talk to your GP.
    It could be that you just rushed into this job too soon, or it could be that you are missing a proper outlet.

    More than likely it could be that you are just missing the challenge of college. Work tends to be drudgery, and for someone with a potentially high IQ - not being challenged well it's a bit like a kick to the gut. A kick you get every day until you dread going to that place. I am guessing that even when Sunday comes now you can feel the anxiety rise and the reasons not to go in start spinning.

    Talk to someone about this - as chances are it will get worse for you. Personally I ended up shift jobs each time it got to the point of wanting to drive away - having commitments always stopped me at that point. Learnt to open up fully to my wife about how I was feeling - it helped a bit. I do regret though never seeking help - maybe you can make that step though.

    Finding another outlet is also a way to go - you know - something that you can look forward to each day - something that is a reward for going to work - work that supports you financially in doing it.


    Just be careful with the lax hours, it will be spotted and could be used against you next time they need to cut costs.


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