She played me - head wrecked

Micahelxcx

I became friends with a 'lovely' girl who was already in a steady relationship.
We would chat easily with each other and she opened up and told me lots about herself. She never mentioned anything about her bf.
I found myself becoming attracted to her romantically because of the way she would tell me everything about herself, friends, work etc.
Suddenly, she went all cold on me and now doesn't want anything to do with me. She doesn't even want to be friends anymore.
Now my head is wrecked. I never asked her out nor did I make a move nor did I express my feelings for her at all. We would just chat as friends.
One of my girl friends who is aware of the situation said this girl 'played me' and then realised she was getting involved and pulled right back.
Another gf of mine suggested she enjoys attention and the ego boost of a guy chatting with her.
Has anyone else been in this situation? I feel as if I have insulted her which I haven't done. But that is the way she left it.

Chinafoot

Micahelxcx wrote: »

I became friends with a 'lovely' girl who was already in a steady relationship.
We would chat easily with each other and she opened up and told me lots about herself. She never mentioned anything about her bf.
I found myself becoming attracted to her romantically because of the way she would tell me everything about herself, friends, work etc.
Suddenly, she went all cold on me and now doesn't want anything to do with me. She doesn't even want to be friends anymore.
Now my head is wrecked. I never asked her out nor did I make a move nor did I express my feelings for her at all. We would just chat as friends.
One of my girl friends who is aware of the situation said this girl 'played me' and then realised she was getting involved and pulled right back.
Another gf of mine suggested she enjoys attention and the ego boost of a guy chatting with her.
Has anyone else been in this situation? I feel as if I have insulted her which I haven't done. But that is the way she left it.

Sorry but your friend is full of crap. How on earth were you "played"? There is a good chance that your feelings were obvious to this woman and she felt it best to put a stop to things as she is in a stable relationship. Have you considered actually asking this girl whats wrong?

Alternatively you could you just move on because she is taken and clearly not interested in you.

Drops of Jupiter

Micahelxcx wrote: »

I became friends with a 'lovely' girl who was already in a steady relationship.
We would chat easily with each other and she opened up and told me lots about herself. She never mentioned anything about her bf".

If she was telling you everything it's odd that the bf was never once mentioned! She may have liked the attention from you and decided to leave that piece out. However, a lot of times girls are more open than guys and chat about personal stuff which some guys take as them fancying them.

"I found myself becoming attracted to her romantically because of the way she would tell me everything about herself, friends, work etc."

Again girls talk more than guys in general about personal stuff (except the bf in this case!)

"Suddenly, she went all cold on me and now doesn't want anything to do with me. She doesn't even want to be friends anymore.
Now my head is wrecked. I never asked her out nor did I make a move nor did"

It's all very confusing this men and women stuff. I think if we were all much more direct and honest with each other things would be easier in the long run! I would ask her straight out. Don't waste time beating yourself up over what might be going on.

Say can I have a quick chat and say I noticed we don't talk anymore etc. Did I do something? If she is not mature enough to be honest with you or explain herself then she is not worth having as a friend. Then at least you know where you stand. Good luck.

Silverfish

Micahelxcx, I have split your post to it's own thread so you can receive replies to your issue.

Micahelxcx

Thank you both for your responses.

Firstly, I never displayed any feelings for her 'cos she is with someone.
As she never mentioned her bf in details I wondered if she was happy in that relationship.
If she thought I fanced her and was going to make a move then she was being very presumptuous because I wouldn't do that while she is going with someone else.
My friend is not talking crap. She read some of this girl's texts to me and was surprised. BTW I never initiated texting her, it was always the other way round.

Secondly, I did try asking her what was wrong and she wouldn't say. Just said she had been very busy. But she was lying through her teeth!!
why do women like her have to lead on guys and then get rid of them just as quickly? Do they get pleasure from it?

Chinafoot

Micahelxcx wrote: »

Thank you both for your responses.

Firstly, I never displayed any feelings for her 'cos she is with someone.
As she never mentioned her bf in details I wondered if she was happy in that relationship.
If she thought I fanced her and was going to make a move then she was being very presumptuous because I wouldn't do that while she is going with someone else.
My friend is not talking crap. She read some of this girl's texts to me and was surprised. BTW I never initiated texting her, it was always the other way round.

Its not really presumptuos when you do have feelings for her.

Micahelxcx wrote: »

Secondly, I did try asking her what was wrong and she wouldn't say. Just said she had been very busy. But she was lying through her teeth!!
why do women like her have to lead on guys and then get rid of them just as quickly? Do they get pleasure from it?

How were you lead on? By her chatting to you? Also, how do you know she's lying? She could be busy. If you are romatically intrested in her, know nothing is going to happen as she's taken, why not chalk this one down to experience and move on and find someone available.

Drops of Jupiter

Hi OP,

I really don't know! Sounds like there may be a bit more to the story. However, is she is not going to tell you what is going on there is not much you can do really.

Maybe the boyfriend found out that she was texting you or something?
Who knows? Maybe she is very insecure? Has other problems/stuff going on.

I would try one more time to try and speak to her just so you are not so head wrecked by all of this. If she declines again then you just need to chalk it up to experience. Be polite and nice to this girl if you meet her but keep your distance.

Like I said this whole men/women relations can be complicated. It's not just girls who act like this either. Why do guys bother taking someone's phone number, act like they are really into a girl and then not call.

MicraBoy

From the info you have given I don't see how she "played" you at all. SOunds like it never went that far really.

It's quite possible she does fancy you in some way and is pulling back to protect her relationship. that's far enough on her part and she would deserve credit for doing it. Although she may be could have done it better to be nice to you.

On the other hand its also possible she detected your interest and doesn't fancy you and is putting distance between you so you will ge the message, again maybe not the best way to handle since all she had to do was mention the bf.

Either way I think that both men and women do engage in a bit of ego boosting when they are unavailable. There's a big difference between that and being played though.

Micahelxcx

Thank you all for your contributions.
TBH I'm not going to bother with her.
I have blanked her on subsequent occasions when our paths crossed.
The latest was Friday morning last.
She was walking over towards me and when she thought I saw her, she smiled at me.
Afraid I didn't return the compliment and continued walking having giving her a sufficient glance to let her know I saw her.
I don't approve of men or women messing people around.
This girl flirted with me and lead me on however briefly. It was the manner in which she treated me afterwards that was appalling and very upsetting.
She tried to make out that I was at fault.
How can she sense I fancied her when I never, ever, got personal with her at any level?
I agree she may be insecure or have other issues in her life I am not aware of. However, she shouldn't have used me as a sounding board. It shows a lack of respect towards me.
As one gf said I had a lucky escape. She was self absorbed.

Ps I am not a relationship breaker. Never have been, never will be.

Kimia

How exactly did she 'lead you on' OP? Jesus Christ, she can't even be friends with you without you assuming that she's flirting and leading you on. I am not surprised that she doesn't want to be friends with you, you sound like a complete d*ck. What was so appalling and upsetting about the 'aftermath'? She just didn't want to continue your friendship. As others have said above, perhaps she sensed your interest and wanted to put a stop to it (and fair play to her if so).

My god. She didn't 'play' you at all, well at least not from what you've said anyway. Unless she told you she was interested, then not interested, came on to you (and not just in YOUR head), THEN she was playing you. All it sounds like to me is that she thought you were a nice genuine person and that you were friends, and then suddenly put a stop to it.

have you even asked her? Have you even had the courtesy to ask her what suddenly happened? Maybe her bf thought that your friendship was inappropriate and she's protecting her relationship? It could be anything, but you have assumed that she's a horrible person who played you. That says more about you than her. :mad:

TitoPuente

I'd kind of have to agree with what's been said above. It all sounds a bit weird and desperate. I mean... you said yourself that there was no emotional involvement. If you hadn't been together romantically then why are your expectations for anything else so high? Maybe she was giving herself a little ego boost by dangling a carrot in front of you, flirting with you and leading you on a little bit. But until you're in a proper relationship with this woman, you can't exactly say you were 'played'.

It sounds like you really wanted to be with the girl but she owed you nothing and, from what I can tell, never promised you anything. Sitting on the internet and sulking about it does make you appear quite pathetic. Get over it, move on and meet someone else is the only advice I could offer.

Wagon

Kimia wrote: »

How exactly did she 'lead you on' OP? Jesus Christ, she can't even be friends with you without you assuming that she's flirting and leading you on. I am not surprised that she doesn't want to be friends with you, you sound like a complete d*ck. What was so appalling and upsetting about the 'aftermath'? She just didn't want to continue your friendship. As others have said above, perhaps she sensed your interest and wanted to put a stop to it (and fair play to her if so).

All she had to do was just say it to him. Just ask him outright if he was interested and then say it's best they spend time apart until it subsides. considering how the OP had no intentions of making a move when he heard she had a boyfriend, i don't think he would have minded a bit of courtesy.

My god. She didn't 'play' you at all, well at least not from what you've said anyway. Unless she told you she was interested, then not interested, came on to you (and not just in YOUR head), THEN she was playing you. All it sounds like to me is that she thought you were a nice genuine person and that you were friends, and then suddenly put a stop to it.

She didn't play in in a relationship sense but say for a moment this thread wasn't in "relationship issues". Imagine one of your friends just ignored you. Out of the blue. Would you like it?

have you even asked her? Have you even had the courtesy to ask her what suddenly happened? Maybe her bf thought that your friendship was inappropriate and she's protecting her relationship? It could be anything, but you have assumed that she's a horrible person who played you. That says more about you than her. :mad:

Why should he ask her exactly? She gave him the answer and that was to just ignore him without any explaination. Kind of puts into perspective how much she values his friendship.

OP, you were right to ignore her. I'm not approaching this problem in a relationship sense because there wasn't one. I'm looking at it simply from friendship. Say you had no romantic interest in her and she just a regular mate. And then she stopped talking and ignored you. Not a nice person. I dont think you were "played". I think you were used.

As to why? Christ, I have no idea. It's like trying to unravel the mystery of the universe sometimes. It could be a few reasons. Most likely one of them being is that she isn't getting any good emitional treatment from her current boyfriend. Maybe he's a little bit of a dick but she still likes him. She liked you enough to be "close" friends and have those lovely long talks which made her feel better. then when she's done, she can just put you aside until she needs you again. This is just a theory but it's the most common one in my experience. And if you're completely honest with yourself and she flirted and gave you a little bit more attention than others, well that was maybe her way of keeping you in check.

Look on the bright side, this didn't go on long. I have seen this go on for months on end with some people. I agree with your mates when they said you had a lucky escape. Girls carry on like that. Women don't.

Faith

Micahelxcx wrote: »

She was walking over towards me and when she thought I saw her, she smiled at me.
Afraid I didn't return the compliment and continued walking having giving her a sufficient glance to let her know I saw her.
I don't approve of men or women messing people around.

Oh, the irony. Even if she was messing you around, which it really doesn't sound like, you're now behaving just as badly. You don't understand why she went cold; so you go cold without telling her why? If you're always that immature, I'm not terribly surprised she didn't want to be friends with you.

You've blown this whole thing completely out of proportion, tbh.

LegacyUser

i'm kinda surprised at some of the responses to the OP. Some of them were really vicious and unjustified. I mean is his story that unbelievable???...not at all from my experience. i'm willing to give him the benefit of the doubt and believe that he is accurate in how he's decribing how events happened.

of course, i agree he wasn't 'played' per se but it does sound like she was using him as an ego booster and then got cold when she had her kicks. i've met plenty of women like that was i was younger and naive and fell hook, line and sinker for their games. now i can spot the mile off and don't entertain their crap. put this one down to experience....it happens to us all!

Handsome Bob

It's impossible to say OP. All I'd say is that if a pattern develops or her seeking you out and then alienating you after awhile then it probably is just a case of her using you for an ego boost.

If it's wrecking your head that much maybe you should just be direct and ask why she has been distant.

LegacyUser

What did she say in the texts she sent you? Did your friends ask you to see the texts, or did you offer to show the texts to your friends? If you offered to show the texts to your friends, then the way you talked about this girl would have given your friends the signal that you want them to think she was using you. Good friends will always support your opinion and actions over the opinion and actions of someone they don't know.

+1 on your immaturity. Ignoring this girl because you felt she lead you on even though there has been no evidence as yet to suggest that she wanted to see you romantically is childish in the extreme.

m@cc@

Micahelxcx wrote: »

If she thought I fanced her and was going to make a move then she was being very presumptuous because I wouldn't do that while she is going with someone else.

BS. Then what is this thread about? I'm sorry but you show the classic signs of someone who has little experience in speaking to women and being able to separate someone being friendly with someone being genuinely interested. Did she really not mention her BF, or was it what you weren't listening? You knew she had a BF so what's the problem?

I'd be interested to hear what event led her to 'suddenly' go cold.

spinandscribble

safasfs wrote: »

i'm kinda surprised at some of the responses to the OP. Some of them were really vicious and unjustified. I mean is his story that unbelievable???...not at all from my experience. i'm willing to give him the benefit of the doubt and believe that he is accurate in how he's decribing how events happened.

of course, i agree he wasn't 'played' per se but it does sound like she was using him as an ego booster and then got cold when she had her kicks. i've met plenty of women like that was i was younger and naive and fell hook, line and sinker for their games. now i can spot the mile off and don't entertain their crap. put this one down to experience....it happens to us all!

its sad but true. I've had many a hush hush conversation with girls over the years who admitted to doing this maybe on purpose, maybe not "exactly" the old "i wasn't feeling "good" about myself and he was so nice...". I'm sure these actions are not the norm of either gender but it sounds like this is what the girls was up to. Chalk it up to experience if you feel this was the case.

edit: just noticed your less then mature ignoring her stance. maybe she was happy to have your attention or maybe she liked you as a friend and panicked that you might have liked her and cooled off to gauge you along with a million other things. whatever it was you don't know for sure and your action wasn't cool.

Wagon

spinandscribble wrote: »

edit: just noticed your less then mature ignoring her stance. maybe she was happy to have your attention or maybe she liked you as a friend and panicked that you might have liked her and cooled off to gauge you along with a million other things. whatever it was you don't know for sure and your action wasn't cool.

I don't know. I'm suprised by the really ironic responses here. I've read loads of time advice on PI to ignore someone and how it's a more mature responce but now this guy is being immature? Is there some sort of newly introduced double standard here where by women can ignore you but men aren't allowed? Sure looks like it.

I think he's doing grand personally. I had an experience like this before.

A few years ago, i cut contact with a mate of mine after she pretty much did the same thing to me. Only difference is we were friends for a few years and i was absolutely well into her. But she started to just ignore me. She was also the girlfriend of my best friend. They had been together for ages at this stage and she knew me a while as well. But she found other friends, still called sometimes to complain i never ring her (i did, but it was ignored) and then I'd see her sometimes. and that's it. I told her how i felt about her eventually and she laughed at me. I didn't know what to do so my mother in all her great wisdom, told me to just ignore her. I didn't know at the time if it was a good idea but she said to me it was for the best.

Well, i took the advice and i ignored phone calls and messages. Not that there was many. I recieved about two in 6 months. Her and my mate broke up too (completely unrelated problems) In that time I had gotten much better about the whole damn thing and my head felt quite clear for the first time in about a year. It was savage! Then one day, me and some mates were out watching a match and getting pissed. Was a good time and then she shows up. I kept ignoring her. Not a word passed between us for about 2 hours even though i think she tried. But i was pissed and having fun.

Then later guilt got to me. I had a chat with her and asked her how she was. Open the floodgates, miserable, dont know what im doing in life, kicked out of house yesterday etc... Again, I was a ****ing sounding board. Got a phone call the next day from her (this would be maybe the first time in 5 months, cant remember exactly) asking if she can stay in my house for the night. So there you go! I was useful to her, it's not like she wanted to see me. I told her no and i didnt have room in the house, which was actually the truth. Didn't hear from her for months after that again and frankly, i wasn't suprised.

So sometimes, ignoring someone is a very very good idea. You're protecting yourself. The OP has made that decision and i think it's a very mature one personally. Now, an immature decision would be where he would start pestering her, insulting her on the street, screaming at her in verbal warfare and threatening her. That's immature. Deciding to stop wasting your time and energy being friends with someone that uses you when they need you? Very mature I think.

LegacyUser

Wagon wrote: »

So sometimes, ignoring someone is a very very good idea. You're protecting yourself.

your mother's advice was sound but she probably meant for you to ignore the way that girl was carrying on, not ignore her out right. If I don't get on with someone, I ignore their actions and comments, but I still pass myself with them. I don't blank them in the street if they say hello to me. The person who's acting the jackass probable doesn't realise they're acting the jackass (the human mind is very powerful and should never be under estimated when it comes to ignoring one's own faults!), so if you ignore them they start wondering what your problem is and will eventually come to the conclusion that you're the one being the jackass!

Kimia

Ya see Wagon, where did you get the idea that she 'used' him when she needed him - all I took from the OP was that they were friends, and friends talk to each other, confide in each other etc. I don't know why you and the OP have this sense of entitlement that if you're mates with a girl she owes you something. It's f*cked up tbh and you'd want to get over it.

And to answer your earlier points:

All she had to do was just say it to him. Just ask him outright if he was interested and then say it's best they spend time apart until it subsides. considering how the OP had no intentions of making a move when he heard she had a boyfriend, i don't think he would have minded a bit of courtesy.

Why should she ask him anything? She assumed that they were friends and that's it.

She didn't play in in a relationship sense but say for a moment this thread wasn't in "relationship issues". Imagine one of your friends just ignored you. Out of the blue. Would you like it?

I'm female and if one of my female friends stopped speaking to me, I'd ask her why. I wouldn't just ignore her - it's weird and I would like to know the reason why in case I offended or upset her in some way.

Why should he ask her exactly? She gave him the answer and that was to just ignore him without any explaination. Kind of puts into perspective how much she values his friendship.

This doesn't make any sense at all. He should ask her because she was his mate and she stopped being friendly with him. She gave him no 'answer' - there was no question.

You both need to stop assuming that she is a b*tch. I would say that that actually makes him a crappy friend, he can't even give her the benefit of the doubt? All I can see here is bitterness because he feels some weird sense of entitlement, that she 'owes' him something because he was good friend to her. Well clearly he wasn't a good friend at all because all along he just wanted to score her, he didn't care about her at all. If he did he'd man up and not assume that she's a horrible person, he'd actually have the guts to ask her what's up.

katie99

He actually did ask her what was wrong according to him here. She didn't give him a straight answer.
He said he wasn't into her because she was with someone else. I admire him for that.
She has treated him badly. Seems to me she liked him and got cold feet 'cost she developed some feelings for him but pulled back 'cos she has a bf. But in doing so, she choose to ignore him completely which I believe is rude and bad mannered.
I think the OP meant the was ignoring her in that he wasn't going to waste any more time on her.
She is the immature person in that she should have come clean and explained her actions to him.
He is absolutely correct in his decision to ignore her. If he sees her I am sure he will say hello to her out of courtesy but that's all.
I know two of my gf's have behaved similarly to guys and the guys ended up very confused.
I say to everyone DON'T PLAY MIND GAMES WITH PEOPLE.

fungun

Sounds like a mountain made out of a molehill to me tbh.

1. She was friends with you liked you, maybe flirted a bit.
2. She then either realised she liked you too much, or someone said sth to her, or her bf might have said he didnt like her being so close to another guy
3. She pulls back a bit to protect herself, and because she doesnt quite know what to say to you ignores you even though she doesnt want to be that hurtful.

Id say thats a fairly common occurrence to be honest

Wagon

Kimia wrote: »

Ya see Wagon, where did you get the idea that she 'used' him when she needed him - all I took from the OP was that they were friends, and friends talk to each other, confide in each other etc. I don't know why you and the OP have this sense of entitlement that if you're mates with a girl she owes you something. It's f*cked up tbh and you'd want to get over it.

Get over yourself! It's not my thread and im not asking for your advice.

You both need to stop assuming that she is a b*tch. I would say that that actually makes him a crappy friend, he can't even give her the benefit of the doubt? All I can see here is bitterness because he feels some weird sense of entitlement, that she 'owes' him something because he was good friend to her.

What sense of entitlement?! He just wants to know what's happening and he was afraid he offended her or something. It's okay for her to just suddenly stop ignoring him and he has to accept that because he is her friend? That isn't a frienship. That's a joke!

Well clearly he wasn't a good friend at all because all along he just wanted to score her, he didn't care about her at all. If he did he'd man up and not assume that she's a horrible person, he'd actually have the guts to ask her what's up.

He did ask her. She never gave a straight answer.

Secondly, I did try asking her what was wrong and she wouldn't say. Just said she had been very busy

He didn't want to score her because she has a boyfriend and he made it pretty clear that he had no intention of breaking that up.

Firstly, I never displayed any feelings for her 'cos she is with someone.

If she thought I fanced her and was going to make a move then she was being very presumptuous because I wouldn't do that while she is going with someone else.

The chap may have liked her but he never let on and never had any intention of doing anything about it. I think he's posting here because he wants to know what the hell happened as to why she just suddenly stopped talking to him for no reason. And the only answer i can think of was using him for emotional support. Happened to me, happened to friends. It just happens and it looked like it happened here.

You can choose your friends. He clearly is and there's nothing wrong with that.


He didn't want to score her because she has a boyfriend and he made it pretty clear that he had no intention of breaking that up.

Firstly, I never displayed any feelings for her 'cos she is with someone.

If she thought I fanced her and was going to make a move then she was being very presumptuous because I wouldn't do that while she is going with someone else.

The chap may have liked her but he never let on and never had any intention of doing anything about it. I think he's posting here because he wants to know what the hell happened as to why she just suddenly stopped talking to him for no reason. And the only answer i can think of was using him for emotional support. Happened to me, happened to friends. It just happens and it looked like it happened here.

You can choose your friends. He clearly is and there's nothing wrong with that.

your mother's advice was sound but she probably meant for you to ignore the way that girl was carrying on, not ignore her out right.

No no, she meant ignore her properly.

If I don't get on with someone, I ignore their actions and comments, but I still pass myself with them. I don't blank them in the street if they say hello to me.

I never bother with that. I think it's really dishonest and kind of depressing to feel like you have to always be polite, even to people who treated you badly.

The person who's acting the jackass probable doesn't realise they're acting the jackass (the human mind is very powerful and should never be under estimated when it comes to ignoring one's own faults!), so if you ignore them they start wondering what your problem is and will eventually come to the conclusion that you're the one being the jackass!

Someone who is incapable of looking at themselves honestly for 5 minutes, not try and cast their mind to a time when there was maybe a reason for this and just assume that you're an jackass for ignoring them?

Serious question, why would you even want to try to be friendly/polite to someone like that? They're assholes! Let them think what they want.

Chinafoot

Wagon wrote: »

He did ask her. She never gave a straight answer.

Why the assumption that her telling him she's been really busy lately is a lie? Because the OP, who thinks he got "played" says so? She gave him an answer, he decided not to accept it. Maybe she has been really busy. She could have a whole myriad of things happening in her life at the moment that the OP is unaware of.

Acting the sack by ignoring her while taking such massive offence to this perceived slight on him is, quite frankly, childish in the extreme. She could have been on her way over to explain everything to him or to apologise for not being around. He made up his mind based on fúck all so the best thing he can do now is forget about it and move on.

Chucky the tree

lol at all this.

If OP is she an honorable gent then why did he remain friends with her for so long when he had feelings for her? I mean he must have realised it was going no where and considering as soon as she eased up on contact for a short while, which was bound to happen at some stage with someone who has a bf, he throw his toys out of the pram in epic fashion I find it very hard to believe he only ever wanted to remain friends. Anyone who has a platonic friend who dates someone will know that you go through phases of little contact for a few weeks because there busy with there other half etc etc.

All of OPs posted are littered with deluded OT bull****.

ddenly, she went all cold on me and now doesn't want anything to do with me. She doesn't even want to be friends anymore.

She was walking over towards me and when she thought I saw her, she smiled at me.

hmmm, hardly the actions of someone who wants nothing to do with OP. I certainly wouldn't blame her now after the OP blanked her like a 10 years whos mom didn't buy him sweets in the shop. I'm surprised OP didn't just throw himself to the ground kicking and screaming.

I never asked her out nor did I make a move nor did I express my feelings for her at all. We would just chat as friends.

This girl flirted with me and lead me on however briefly. It was the manner in which she treated me afterwards that was appalling and very upsetting.
She tried to make out that I was at fault.
How can she sense I fancied her when I never, ever, got personal with her at any level?

So which is it? A lot of the time it's very easy to tell when someone fancies you, they don't have to tell you. It's especially easy for other people to tell, so if you hang around with other people they could have had a word in her ear and let her know and she might have backed off.

I agree she may be insecure or have other issues in her life I am not aware of. However, she shouldn't have used me as a sounding board. It shows a lack of respect towards me.
As one gf said I had a lucky escape. She was self absorbed.

Pot kettle to be honest. Everyone goes through phases were they lose touch for a bit with friends, work, college, bf's, family, money etc etc can all get in the way. When it happens to my friends they just say there busy and that's grand. To me it seems you want a list of things she was busy with before you believe her. It pretty obvious you wanted more then friendship from this and now you realize thats not possible/she's not interested you thrown the toys.

LegacyUser

Wagon wrote: »

Someone who is incapable of looking at themselves honestly for 5 minutes, not try and cast their mind to a time when there was maybe a reason for this and just assume that you're an jackass for ignoring them?

It took me a long time to accept this fact. A long time to learn that most people think that they way they deal with things is right, fair and just. I used to think that other people were rude, impatient, thoughtless and unkind. Until I started to look at my own actions and realised that maybe other people viewed me in the same way.

I've less hassle with people now that I've realised they're only human like me!