How do i get over my perfences to this race. It ripping me apart

EducationFinder

I seriously can take it anymore -_-

I LOVE ASIAN GUYS.
i don't know why i just do and the painful thing is no matter how much i want to i can't have one.
Mainly because am black (And most races don't like black women)
and two am not very attractive.
I hate it and i just wanna stop it. It makes me hate my self and my race anytime i look in the mirror i really really hate myself it killing me

All your advices are awesome but am only 16 XD unfortunately i don't wish for this perference to follow me into my audlthood, i just wanna to relax and focus on my studies, and not get hurt or be alone for the rest of my life because i only feel for one race.

Eve_Dublin

Most men don´t like black women?? That hasn´t been my experience OP. That just doesn´t make any sense at all. I think everyone has a preference for a certain type...I´m attracted to Dark skinned men (Latin look), I like black men but I also like the pasty, blue eyed, black haired Irish man. I generally like what´s around me, what I have access to and what I actually have a chance with. As I said, I´ve always been attracted to black men but I´ve never had to a chance to socialise with them when I lived in Ireland (live in Madrid, which is still pretty segregated)and I always thought that was a pity and I´m hoping it´ll change in time.

Why are beating yourself up over having a preference? Do you live in Ireland OP? I understand that Irish society is still pretty segregated and to be honest, I never saw many Asian (from any Asian country) out in bars in Dublin. They kept to themselves.

I can´t give you any tips on how to meet a nice Asian man I´m afraid....maybe internet dating?

But first things first, you have to stop believing that you´re not attractive to certain men because of your skin colour. That´s just not true...I could find you at least 20 Irish men who go for women of all colours it´s just they never get a chance to meet them (i.e: they don´t socialise in the same places)

Most people who don´t believe they are attractive are usually wrong. Were our own worst judges and we´re usually wrong.

LegacyUser

Have you ever considered travelling in Asia for a while? I'm sure you'd have the opportunity to meet a larger amount of Asian lads that way - even if it was only for a holiday romance that you could look back on fondly...

Also, have you ever heard the phrase - "What's rare is beautiful"?

irishh_bob

EducationFinder wrote: »

I seriously can take it anymore -_-

I LOVE ASIAN GUYS.
i don't know why i just do and the painful thing is no matter how much i want to i can't have one.
Mainly because am black (And most races don't like black women)
and two am not very attractive.
I hate it and i just wanna stop it. It makes me hate my self and my race anytime i look in the mirror i really really hate myself it killing me

are you crazy , black women are super hot , big personality with curves in all the right places

Karmafaerie

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

I´m attracted to Dark skinned men (Latin look), I like black men but I also like the pasty, blue eyed, black haired Irish man. I generally like what´s around me, what I have access to and what I actually have a chance with.

Awesome!:D

That's the attitude you should have right there OP.

Everyone has a particular type, but it's rarely so black and white (pardon the pun) as being solely down to race.
If I find a woman attractive, I wouldn't care if she's white, black, Asian, or anything else.

Unless someone's closed minded, race means nothing.

If you like Asian men then embrace it.
Quiet often in Ireland the different cultures are very closed off, but that shouldn't stop you.

Don't think that becasue you're black that that'll stop you, just like I didn't think that the fact that I'm white should be an issue when I used to date a girl who was from China.
I liked her, she liked me, that's all that mattered.

Attraction > Race.

kjl

I can assure you there are plenty of asian men out there who have nobody, just go up and ask any of them out, Ill bet you do well

LegacyUser

I am an asian female , the op is actually correct , in many asian societies black skin is considered the most undesirable and i personally know of a woman whos family disowned her because she married a black afro american man , very sad , she has not spoken to her family in a few years , and was told never to come home again , so you see ....the o p is indeed in a predicament most irish people do not understand , as we have learned to look past the skin colour issue . I am originally from hong kong and i know if brought a black man home my family would likely disown me too , my father once said to me , you can marry who ever you want as long as he is neither black or muslim , I am not saying that this attitude is right , but this is the view of millions of asian people , a long held view , where by you would bring shame on your family to date a black person , white would be ok , but not black . I am fairly sure the o p already knows this .

Supercell

My Fiancée is Asian and unfortunately OP I think you are are unlikely to find success.
Any Asian man that marries a black women is not likely to be welcomed back home and even abroad his fellow Asian friends and family would find it very hard to accept.
It seems unfair and I suppose it is, but that is the truth of it.

Miss Fluff

The OP is correct. I lived and worked in China and the racist comments and thinking on black people in general would make your head spin Going out with a black man/woman would most likely result in the person being disowned by their family from my experience.

Have you tried online dating OP? That way you can wheedle out any prejudices before talking to someone or agreeing to a date.

teaandtoast

well you should be proud of ur race ur culture and ur uniqueness. well asia is a big continent, is it all asian men or what race in particular ur attracted to? in asia u have japan, korea, china, india, philopines, indonesia, malaysia etc.... U should try cultural exchanges, maybe going to evening class on culture or languages

Zaph

teaandtoast, we don't allow text speak in this forum so it would be appreciated if you you made full use of your keyboard in future. Thanks.

WindSock

At well over a billion Asians, you are sure to find a few that will deviate from that afformented view

LegacyUser

i'm half white, half asian and i've no problem being with a black bird. i've heard the other comments but you can't generalise a whole race! the world is constantly changing regarding attitudes.....i guarantee the op could score asian men if she makes the right moves......we're men after all....we think with our pants!!!

teaandtoast

Zaph wrote: »

teaandtoast, we don't allow text speak in this forum so it would be appreciated if you you made full use of your keyboard in future. Thanks.

Well is it in the terms and conditions and rules and regulations of boards.ie ? that text language or speaking is not allowed because you have a long way to go yahoo hotmail and google all allow text language. Can you show me where it is in the terms and conditions of boards.ie that text language is not allowed to be expressed ?

Silverfish

teaandtoast wrote: »

Well is it in the terms and conditions and rules and regulations of boards.ie ? that text language or speaking is not allowed because you have a long way to go yahoo hotmail and google all allow text language. Can you show me where it is in the terms and conditions of boards.ie that text language is not allowed to be expressed ?

From the PI charter:

Txtspk is not permitted on this forum, posts which are too hard to read will be deleted.

Calibos

I am sure in a lot of cases its not down to race per se but just that people fancy what they fancy. I myself am not attracted to most black women. Its not down to race or skin colour. Its more that I am not a 'big arse' man and unfortunately from mypoint of view(preferences) black women are more likely to have big arses. While I like Latino women I don't fancy big booty latinas either. Like I said its not down to race or colour. I love black skinned Asian indians or North west african black women (Ethiopian, Somalian etc) It so happens that these black women generally aren't big booty women.

Of course on the other hand there are blokes who love big arses. They probably love Sub Saharan african black women.

Tiger Woods is mixed race Asian and African btw. Due to racist attitudes in China or other far east countries, do you stand much chance of scoring an Asian man? Probably not. But with Asian men who have assimilated somewhat over here, you probably stand a much better chance of scoring as the melting pot of races and cultures changes a lot of peoples attitude to races. Of course we are a decade or two behind the curve in Ireland because we have only had mass immigration in the last ten years whereas the process is much further advanced in the US and UK. But give it time and you'll probably find it as easy here to score an asian as a white or black guy.

Eve_Dublin

An article I read yesterday....this is the situation in the USA but times they are a changin´ folks thanks be to jaysus.

http://edition.cnn.com/2010/LIVING/06/04/pew.interracial.marriage/index.html

EducationFinder

All your advices are awesome but am only 16 XD unfortunately i don't wish for this perference to follow me into my audlthood, i just wanna to relax and focus on my studies, and not get hurt or be alone for the rest of my life because i only feel for one race.

Bottle_of_Smoke

There's gonna be lots of Asian guys your age born here who won't have the cultural dislike of Africans common in the far east. In fact if they suffer from racism they'll probably be likely to reject it completely.

One thing you'll have to watch out for is that many white guys assume black girls aren't interested in them, wouldn't be surprised if its the same with Asians, so you might have to ask a guy out :eek:

Don't worry about it. You're young and I'd be very surprised if this still bothers you in 2years time.