Worried..

LegacyUser

Firstly, not looking for medical advice at all!! More about how to deal with this situation. I think I might have an std. I've had random bleeding (which at first I attributed to the contraception I'm on - depo) but more recently I've had some pain during sex which has made it very uncomfortable, and forced me and my bf to stop. It happened last night, and I'm going to go to the doctor asap next week to finally sort out whats going on, so not looking for any attempted diagnosis or anything.

Problem is, I'm worried about my boyfriends reaction. He said to me I should get it checked out, which I agreed with. Then joked that it could be an std. I said "I hope not" and he looked at me a bit strangely and said "Well, yea I hope not! You wouldn't have gotten it from me anyway!" (his last gf was nearly a year ago, and he's not into one night stands - we were good friends before we went out so I know this). Now, this wasn't said in an aggressive way at all, more jokey, but I'm worried that if it does end up being the case, that he'll think I cheated or something. I've only been with him 4 months, and broke up with my long term bf (and only other sexual partner) two months before getting with him. Is it possible that I could have had something and it didn't show up symptoms til now? Maybe I'm jumping the gun a little bit, considering I havn't been diagnosed or anything, but I know something isn't right "down there".

If I do have an std, how do I go about telling him? He's a great guy, we've been friends for years and I can (and have) talk to him about anything, but I'm just scared about this, that he'll think I cheated or something like that. Just looking for some advice on how to handle this. We're both 20 by the way. I'm really worried atm....

up for anything

possstd wrote: »

Problem is, I'm worried about my boyfriends reaction. He said to me I should get it checked out, which I agreed with. Then joked that it could be an std. I said "I hope not" and he looked at me a bit strangely and said "Well, yea I hope not! You wouldn't have gotten it from me anyway!" (his last gf was nearly a year ago, and he's not into one night stands - we were good friends before we went out so I know this). Now, this wasn't said in an aggressive way at all, more jokey

Hmmm, sounds to me like he might be hiding something. He might be a good friend turned boyfriend but he may have had a one night stand which he was ashamed to admit to.

For the rest, you need to go to your doctor and get checked out. In the meantime stop worrying until you know you have something to be concerned about.

The random bleeding and the pain on having sex may be completely separate issues. Do you mind me asking what age you are? Have you been for a smear test recently? Have you ever had thrush? (20 questions ) Is the bleeding at random times throughout your cycle or during or after sex?

Denimgirl

possstd wrote: »

Firstly, not looking for medical advice at all!! More about how to deal with this situation. I think I might have an std. I've had random bleeding (which at first I attributed to the contraception I'm on - depo) but more recently I've had some pain during sex which has made it very uncomfortable, and forced me and my bf to stop. It happened last night, and I'm going to go to the doctor asap next week to finally sort out whats going on, so not looking for any attempted diagnosis or anything.

Problem is, I'm worried about my boyfriends reaction. He said to me I should get it checked out, which I agreed with. Then joked that it could be an std. I said "I hope not" and he looked at me a bit strangely and said "Well, yea I hope not! You wouldn't have gotten it from me anyway!" (his last gf was nearly a year ago, and he's not into one night stands - we were good friends before we went out so I know this). Now, this wasn't said in an aggressive way at all, more jokey, but I'm worried that if it does end up being the case, that he'll think I cheated or something. I've only been with him 4 months, and broke up with my long term bf (and only other sexual partner) two months before getting with him. Is it possible that I could have had something and it didn't show up symptoms til now? Maybe I'm jumping the gun a little bit, considering I havn't been diagnosed or anything, but I know something isn't right "down there".

If I do have an std, how do I go about telling him? He's a great guy, we've been friends for years and I can (and have) talk to him about anything, but I'm just scared about this, that he'll think I cheated or something like that. Just looking for some advice on how to handle this. We're both 20 by the way. I'm really worried atm....

Ah don't be worrying,you don't know for sure if it's an std so don;t worry about it til it is confirmed it is one,saying that, if you only slept with 3 guys one of them must have given it to you! no matter the out come if you do have one you'll both get a course of anti biotics and it wil be gone.same thing happened with my friend a few years ago she got back with her ex and it was her ex that gave it to her she was scared but scared more of the word STD that freaked her out as it does everyone!

Kiera

Have you tried new positions lately? I had a BF that was very big and some positions just didn't work, they were too painful and others would make me bleed.

LegacyUser

up for anything wrote: »

Hmmm, sounds to me like he might be hiding something. He might be a good friend turned boyfriend but he may have had a one night stand which he was ashamed to admit to.

For the rest, you need to go to your doctor and get checked out. In the meantime stop worrying until you know you have something to be concerned about.

The random bleeding and the pain on having sex may be completely separate issues. Do you mind me asking what age you are? Have you been for a smear test recently? Have you ever had thrush? (20 questions ) Is the bleeding at random times throughout your cycle or during or after sex?

Thanks for you reply

Yea, while I do know anything is possible of course, he isn't that type of guy (as are his friends). I just hope he doesn't react in a bad way if it turns out to be the case.

True, they could be separate. I know a side effect of the depo is irregular bleeding, but that had calmed down since my body got used to the hormones. It is quite random, although I've noticed it after sex once or twice (however this could be coincidence). I'm only 20, so havn't been for a smear test, and I've never had thrush or anything. Never had any problems which is probably why this is freaking me out a bit! Definitely going to the doctor though, I'm a bit embarrassed, but I know they've seen/heard it all before so just going to do it!

@ Denimgirl: I think you're right, the word std is freaking me out. I'll try not to worry til I know for sure. Do you know how soon they can tell you? Like do they have to send off samples and things?

Thank you for the replies, I just was feeling a bit panicy!

Faith

I was afraid I had an STD for a while, a few months into seeing my ex. I got an STD test which came back clear. I started bleeding during sex, more and more frequently, and eventually went to the doctor. Turns out I had a cervical erosion, a common but not often talked about issue with my cervix. Basically the cells on it were really fragile, and every time they got bumped during sex, they'd start bleeding.

All you can do at the moment is go to the doctor, but in the meantime be aware that dozens of things could be causing your symptoms, not necessarily an STD .

LegacyUser

Kiera wrote: »

Have you tried new positions lately? I had a BF that was very big and some positions just didn't work, they were too painful and others would make me bleed.

My current bf is bigger than my previous one, so it has hurt a bit on occassion. But recently it's gotten much worse, as in past the normal initial "easing into it". And last night, we were doing simple missionary and we had to stop He is very understanding, which helps. But it was just what he said which has made me nervous about telling him something bad, even though I'm probably completely over-reacting!

Contessa Raven

possstd wrote: »

Is it possible that I could have had something and it didn't show up symptoms til now?

I'm really worried atm....

Hey OP,

Some STD's such as Chlamydia can be in your system and not show any symptoms at all while others can take months to display symptoms. I'm not saying this to freak you out. I'm just pointing out that some show no symptoms and others won't show symptoms straight away.

Don't worry until you have answers. It could be something totally different. When you find out what it is, ask questions. If it turns out to be an STD ask how long it can take for it to show symptoms. Just in case your OH does start to question you.

I wouldn't worry just yet although I know that's easier said than done.

Good luck!

CR

Denimgirl

possstd wrote: »

Thanks for you reply

Yea, while I do know anything is possible of course, he isn't that type of guy (as are his friends). I just hope he doesn't react in a bad way if it turns out to be the case.

True, they could be separate. I know a side effect of the depo is irregular bleeding, but that had calmed down since my body got used to the hormones. It is quite random, although I've noticed it after sex once or twice (however this could be coincidence). I'm only 20, so havn't been for a smear test, and I've never had thrush or anything. Never had any problems which is probably why this is freaking me out a bit! Definitely going to the doctor though, I'm a bit embarrassed, but I know they've seen/heard it all before so just going to do it!

@ Denimgirl: I think you're right, the word std is freaking me out. I'll try not to worry til I know for sure. Do you know how soon they can tell you? Like do they have to send off samples and things?

Thank you for the replies, I just was feeling a bit panicy!

They do a swab test like a smear ,you mentioned you never got one before but smears are really Ok so no worries,my friend got her results back I think it was a week or something they called her in the office and told her just caught an STD and ask to bring her bf to be checked then they had to go on anti biotics at the same time so they would'nt re-infect eachother that was it really they are fine now.If you had a throat infection and gave it to him you would both be on medication too!

trowelled

Faith wrote: »

I was afraid I had an STD for a while, a few months into seeing my ex. I got an STD test which came back clear. I started bleeding during sex, more and more frequently, and eventually went to the doctor. Turns out I had a cervical erosion, a common but not often talked about issue with my cervix. Basically the cells on it were really fragile, and every time they got bumped during sex, they'd start bleeding.

All you can do at the moment is go to the doctor, but in the meantime be aware that dozens of things could be causing your symptoms, not necessarily an STD .

+1 on this. The bleeding could be caused by a number of things. It could be cervical erosion, it could be down to a new sex position which may not have suited you, as Kiera pointed out, anything!

I had issues of bleeding during sex and went to the doctor about it. It was what pushed me to have my first smear done. As Faith said all you can do atm is go to the doctor and until you know what is causing it don't be stressing about it being an STI and how you tell your boyfriend. Anything could be causing it.

Best of luck with it all and just try not to stress too much about it.