own ring?

feest

My OH and I have been together for 1.5 years now and have been talking about getting engaged with increasing frequency. He brings it up regularly in fact and I’m delighted at the thought of being his wife. We’re comfortable financially (both working full time, live together in own home, etc.), but neither of us would be extravagant spenders. We would rather spend money on a fantastic holiday than flash clothing or possessions any day. Ten years ago my grandmother passed away and she willed me my great grandmother’s engagement ring. It’s absolutely stunning and I love the history attached. I would love to have it as my engagement ring when my guy proposes, but I have no clue how to broach this with him without (a) seeming exceeding presumptuous if I raise this before he actually proposes, or (b) risking insult to him that I come with my own ring. I just hate the idea of him shelling out money when I already have a ring that I cherish.

Am I being too practical here? Blind to the real symbol of an engagement ring? Risking threat to his ego (yeah, yeah--gender roles)? He has already told me that when he proposes he will bring me shopping for a ring, so while I would be foregoing the ring selection process, there is no big “ring moment” that I would miss. Thoughts on this or how I can approach it with him?

spinandscribble

tbh i think many men would be completely happy not shelling out for a ring especially if its what the wife to be would prefer.

just say to him if one day you were to get get married what would he think of you using your families ring? thats the only way you'll know.

eventually tell him he's free to bring you on holiday or get something else as an engagement gift. :P

Beruthiel

You know what, I don't think any fella would take it badly if you told them the history behind the ring and why you want it as your engagement ring.
Sounds like he will be propose first and then suggest the shopping part. It is at the point that you should tell him about the ring.
He can splash out on a snazzy wedding band instead if he wishes.

Nevyn

Say it to him, and then ask him to get it re sized if it needs it and polished up that way he has it and get get it boxed and then if he wants surprise you with the offical proposal.

SarahSassy

I dont imagine he would mind especially when the ring means so much to you. He could bring it off to get it cleaned and then present it to you when he proposes. Its nice...

Faith

My sister-in-law had her own ring. When my brother decided to propose, he asked her parents for it. It only had a semi-precious stone, so he got real diamonds put into it and proposed with that.

I'd probably just bring it up in casual conversation, unrelated to talk of engagements or marriage. Just slip it in there somewhere so he at least knows about it.

katie99

My gf got engage last year after 8 months of a whirlwind romance. She told her finacé that her grandmother willed her engagement ring to her. He had no problem with that, and brought it to a jewellers to have it reduced to size and cleaned and polished.
He spent about €5k on a wedding band and bracelet for her and she was thrilled.
They are now happily married and are madly in love.

sbsquarepants

Personally, i'd be delighted!
I honestly don't see any bloke having a problem with that!

dublingal80

ah deffo say it to him. you guys have talked about gettig engaged loads before so thre is no problem in saying to him that your grandmothers ring was left to you and you would like to use that as the engagement ring. he would be delighted with that! honestly he will be.
and he still can get you a small token for an engagement pressie if he feels he didnt get you anything when proposing.

wouldnt worry about it. best of luck:)

krudler

I wouldnt have a problem with that, it'd be nice to have something that means more than money as an engagement ring. Why not mention it, and whatever he had planned on spending on the ring can go towards an engagement hoilday for both of you?