Ex Girlfriend

Featherl

Ok, I recently found in locker in boyfriends bedroom, notes and cards from an ex girlfriend. Cards were birthday, anniversary, etc..

Would this be ok with anyone else or would ye be wondering why he had kept them so long?

We are going out 5 years so they are probably 6 years or more old

Would it bother you?

LegacyUser

doesnt matter. it's just for memory.

Munster_Gal

Id say he's just kept them as a memory. doesn't mean that he still has feelings for her!

whatsamsn

Hmmmm, Op if you were dating him for something like under a year and he had them then yeah that would be worrying. But knowing you're dating him for 5 years? ... Maybe its just memories.


But to ease your doubts or any thoughts you have about this I would just keep this issue in mind. If he ever has contact with this women in the future, or other things arise with this women. Then this can be used together with future events to build a bigger picture.

By putting it on the backburner, but not forgetting. You'll ease your mind. Then you'll know in a few months its probably just memories ... or if anything else happens. Now you have your eyes open. You'll know

Best advice. Dont worry too much.

Mackman

I wouldnt worry about it OP.

I kept stuff from my last relationship for years. Cards, photos etc. not much, just a small box of stuff.
My OH found it one day and asked me about it. I explained that it was just for memories. It was a very important part of my life and partly shaped who i am today. She understood this, but said it made her uncomfortable, which is understandable really. So we agreed that either i throw it out or hide it from her a bit better.

Anyway, my point is. Talk to HIM about it. If he's any way reasonable he will understand where you're coming from.

stackerman

We all have a past, and it makes us who we are.
Give him a break and forget about it. Would you prefer if you were the one and only GF he ever had ?

LegacyUser

I have letters and cards and pics of an ex (and very good friend now) of 12 years now.

You just happen to find them? Had he just left them around or were you having a nosey? I've learned not to look for things I might not want to find.

sbsquarepants

blibblinb wrote: »

I have letters and cards and pics of an ex (and very good friend now) of 12 years now.

You just happen to find them? Had he just left them around or were you having a nosey? I've learned not to look for things I might not want to find.

A very important lesson to learn if you ask me! Some people never do though.

It's just a few cards or whatever, when you split up with someone there is no need to completely erase all trace of their existence. I wouldn't give it a second thought if i was you, it's not as if he sits pining over them or has some sort of shrine built!

stackerman

sbsquarepants wrote: »

it's not as if he sits pining over them or has some sort of shrine built!

LOL :pac:

I liked that

Beetlebum

Wow...I can't believe you'd have a problem with this OP.
He has every right to keep cards, photos, memories of his ex. It's not as if he kept her underwear!

You must be ridiculously insecure in the relationship if this bothers you.
You've been together 5 years!! I think it's nuts that you'd bat an eyelid at this!

ManOfMystery

It may also be the fact that he forgot he even has these things. I did a clearout of a room the other day and found stuff lying in drawers (cards etc) which I had long forgotten about.

dublingal80

i agree with everyone else

you have been with him 5 years. you guys are solid. its no biggie

and stop snooping!

Barracudaincork

OP i didnt jump onto the assumption you were snopping like other posters, infact i assumed you were doing some spring cleaning and stumbled accross them, anyhow id say he will be as surprised to find that they are still there as much as you were to find them. I wouldnt worry about it

Featherl

Barracudaincork wrote: »

OP i didnt jump onto the assumption you were snopping like other posters, infact i assumed you were doing some spring cleaning and stumbled accross them, anyhow id say he will be as surprised to find that they are still there as much as you were to find them. I wouldnt worry about it

Thanks Barracudaincork, I wasnt snopping at all, just came accross them! But yes to all, after 5 years together we are solid and its no biggie as you all said. He may have forgotten they were there or he may have kept them for memorie of his past.

banquo

In my own experience - and nothing more - girls read far too much into these things and hate the idea of not being the only girl in his head.

They're just for memories. Someday he'll be old and want pictures etc to look at. Just memories, no feelings. Normal stuff.