Advice re: early puberty

LadyMayBelle

Hi,
Not a mum myself but have a young sister and try to support the folks when I can!

She's almost ten, but seems to be hitting puberty much earlier than I did, and is still very much a child at heart (thank god!).

We encourage her to look after herself in simple ways; importance of washing your face every morn and night, clean clothes, keeping your nails clean. But there are little things like BO; can anyone recommend a type of deodorant for girls of this age? Concerned that neglecting the whole area would lead to bullying by other girls.

Any snippets of advice would be great too, as she is started to get a bit bothered about hair on her legs (which is very thick because she eats very little, but we never mentioned it, so maybe someone in school did).

She's so so young and it's so hard to keep that balance between letting her be a kid and trying to encourage her not to worry about these changes.

Nevyn

A light roll on deodorant for under her arms shouldn't do her any harm but there would be no way in hell I would be encouraging her to shave or anything like that, she is far far to young. What do your parents have to say on this?

LadyMayBelle

Oh, I agree Thaedydal, thanks for that. I wouldn't dream of the shaving/removal route for a child god no! We just explained that everyone gets that hair and it's perfectly normal so she seems okay again.

They want her to be happy and comfortable in her own skin but haven't been faced with this before (I reached puberty much later, at 13 and they were considerably younger parents which they feel made a difference, I don't think it makes a massive difference to be honest!)

Just to clarify, I am in no way advocating encouraging early pubescent kids to adapt to practices that maybe their peers may not be until they are older, just seeking advice

LegacyUser

My sister was similar,
She started shaving her arm pits aged 11 but only if an outfit "required it".

She is olive skinned and was a target for b1tchy frenemies from aged 6 who made a comment on her "hairy legs".
As a result she refused to wear shorts or skirts during the summer ans my parents were deeply saddened because no amount of telling her she was pretty would convince her.

Now she's 13 she uses creams and stuff and it's all just a part of growing up but because she is in control of it herself she's a lot happier and confident.

cbyrd

My eldest daughter is right in the middle of it too she's just turned 11, last year we had the whole washing everyday thing and we got the 'sure for girls' deoderant for her. it's an anti-perspirant but a bit more funky looking.. just getting her to remember it everyday was the hard part!!

she is talking about wanting to shave her legs, but i convinced her not to just yet cos they're blond and they'll grow back black!!

we're into the whole spots and blackheads now!! it's amazing how quickly it came around.. i was 13 too but most of the girls in her class have gotten their periods already :eek: the conversations are hilarious:D

cynder

My lady is concerned about her hairy legs but i have put her off shaving for the minute. When she starts getting hairy arm pits i will give her veet to use.

She will be 11 in sept. She is always nicking my deodorant (she doesn't need it) then again neither did i up until about 2 years ago.

LadyMayBelle

Thanks everyone. It was a scary time for many of us at 13/14 I'm sure, but at 9,10,and 11 it must be tough; just want to make it as easy a transition for her as possible. Have picked up some of the kids range of gentle moisturizer in Tesco and will get some deo for her in the mornings. Don't want to make it a big deal, just help assist her in whatever way I can and let it be natural.

LegacyUser

The good thing is though, if she knows her big sister is using these things it's a lot easier to understand that it's all a part of growing up, even if her classmates aren't there yet

Jumbo156

LadyMayBelle wrote: »

Thanks everyone. It was a scary time for many of us at 13/14 I'm sure, but at 9,10,and 11 it must be tough; just want to make it as easy a transition for her as possible. Have picked up some of the kids range of gentle moisturizer in Tesco and will get some deo for her in the mornings. Don't want to make it a big deal, just help assist her in whatever way I can and let it be natural.

All I can say, she is very lucky to have a big sister like you. Fair play to you

Bonzodog

My 7 year old has recently started developing breast buds. Her mother was an early bloomer, and is also a big girl in that department. Is it too early to be looking at a Training Bra? For the moment, we have left it, as she shows no other signs of puberty, but we are starting to wonder when would be the right time for this.

Beruthiel

LadyMayBelle, I'd start with a natural deodorant if I were you and see if that works first.
This one can be found in Superquinn.
The reason I suggest that is because as you know, deodorants block the pores and the longer you can put that off the better.

She's so so young and it's so hard to keep that balance between letting her be a kid and trying to encourage her not to worry about these changes.

I'm a firm beliver in educating your child on just about anything. It doesn't stop them being a kid, it just helps with their knowledge base and confidence as nothing in the future comes as too much of a shock. Leaving a child in ignorance is much more scarey for them, so don't be afraid to tell her anything she needs to know.

MarcoPolo23

I was the very same when i was 10!
What my mam did was she go me to wear a roll on deodrant for about a year and then when i was 11 i started to buy spray on deodrant, in my opinion i found it easier.
I then just wore leggings and 3quarter lenght trousers for a while in summer but ass u know summer in Ireland is never that sunny anyway, at 12 i waxed my legs for the first time and i personally think that it helped me alot that way.
Also just tell her or get somone around near her age to tell her about puberty but only like BO and other parts that you mentioned and tell her not to worry about it that its just natural thats all.
Hope that helps!

Das Kitty

Crystal Deodorants are brilliant. I would stay away from anti-perspirants for such a young girl. I take it she knows about periods (if she hasn't started)? Maybe when you're both alone and you have yours you could talk about it telling her stuff like "oh I'm so moody because I have my period" or "I'm just getting a hot water bottle for my belly because it helps with the cramps" etc. Also let her know that when she needs the sanitary products that you have them.

I wish I had a big sister like you back in the day!

smelltheglove

God I'm getting all freaked out reading this, my eldest is just gone 8. 10 is too young for shaving or anything imho, I remember the washing stage from my younger brother, who I played a big part in looking after, it is very hard to convince them to wash daily without them getting the feeling that they are smelly. I guess it should be more do as I do etc, lead by example, without letting her get into the more feminine things such as shaving or makeup I suppose share experience with her. If she is still quite young you could say right lets see how long it takes you to have a shower in the morning or maybe if you get up at similar times saying to her, ok tomorrow after I have my shower why dont you have one and I'll do your hair for you, that sort of thing. Go to the shops and get her to help you choose yoour deodarant, smelling different ones, if she is decisive on one in particular say, well why dont I get one for you too, I'll show you what to do with it when we get home. 10 is an innocent enough age so if you make out more like youre treating her she may get into the habit easier.

In the last few months my daughter has mentioned to me about hair on her legs, I just pass it off, I mean shes very blonde, so its not like they stand out but it must be something girls notice more now from a younger age. I am looking forward to her growing up and hitting puberty though I have to say, I developed quite young but my mam moved out before the main parts so it was a very difficult transition for me with a lot of confusion, I'm looking forward to being there for my daughter, helping her through all the moments etc.

Chuchoter

10 is a bit early, not that early.

As a 16 year old who went through puberty at 7 and 8, periods at 9 can I please put it out there that very early puberty is really bad, both psychologically and physically. It reduces your final height by 4 or 5 inches at least and makes you 50% more likely to get breast cancer. As well as that you are always at a disconnect to your peers because you are so much more mature than him. I did not understand my puberty and I am suffering for it now.

Please go to your GPs and investigate preventative measures,especially at the woman with the 7 year old, it is not fun being barely 5 feet tall at 16, when every other woman in my family is 5"3 to 5"5.

m5ex9oqjawdg2i

crayolastereo wrote: »

10 is a bit early, not that early.

As a 16 year old who went through puberty at 7 and 8, periods at 9 can I please put it out there that very early puberty is really bad, both psychologically and physically. It reduces your final height by 4 or 5 inches at least and makes you 50% more likely to get breast cancer. As well as that you are always at a disconnect to your peers because you are so much more mature than him. I did not understand my puberty and I am suffering for it now.

Please go to your GPs and investigate preventative measures,especially at the woman with the 7 year old, it is not fun being barely 5 feet tall at 16, when every other woman in my family is 5"3 to 5"5.

Wow, hold on... do you have any links for the stats you just posted? That will scare the hell out of people here. Please excuse my ignorance, but I never heard any of that. Especially preventing puberty, it's a natural occurance, regardless of age.

No offense, but how is it making you suffer now? Are you 100% sure it's puberty that has you this way? I don't mean to be rude.

LadyMayBelle

Thanks for the replies, this isn't a thread I frequent but remembered I had posted. Das kitty; no she doesn't know about periods yet, and unfortunately I am out of the country now so only see her over skype or email, but would hope to be a resources for her to type/talk if she needs to. Mum should be able to tend to that but my information was a little Tampax book I was given. She herself is a bit uncomfortable about giving this information which isn't her fault, I think a lot of mammies her age are like that. But she has found a website that explains moods and 'new' feelings and is working through that with her. It's just so important for a kid to have their childhood last at long as possible.

Nevyn

Winston Famous Cloth wrote: »

Wow, hold on... do you have any links for the stats you just posted? That will scare the hell out of people here. Please excuse my ignorance, but I never heard any of that. Especially preventing puberty, it's a natural occurance, regardless of age.

Artificial growth hormones in meat and certain plastics are known to have an impact and play a part in early onset puberty. By cutting down on such things it is possible to try and delay puberty until a more normal age.

racso1975

Article in paper sunday saying how in 60's average age was 15 and in 2010 average age of puberty was 9yrs and 6 months.

cynder

yeh i agree with that,

you find that people of asian/african and south american orogin hit puberty younger than the americans and europeans.

If you google the worlds youngest mother you find out that it is a 5 year old peruvian girl. ( now thats just not right )

cbyrd

grindelwald wrote: »

yeh i agree with that,

you find that people of asian/african and south american orogin hit puberty younger than the americans and europeans.

If you google the worlds youngest mother you find out that it is a 5 year old peruvian girl. ( now thats just not right )

Jesus..:eek::eek: you'd wonder is that actually true!!!! and who was the father???

Chuchoter

Winston Famous Cloth wrote: »

Wow, hold on... do you have any links for the stats you just posted? That will scare the hell out of people here. Please excuse my ignorance, but I never heard any of that. Especially preventing puberty, it's a natural occurance, regardless of age.

No offense, but how is it making you suffer now? Are you 100% sure it's puberty that has you this way? I don't mean to be rude.

Height is a well known side effect of precocious puberty
:http://www.drgreene.com/azguide/early-puberty
Look down the bottom. There are more complicated studies that say the same thing like this one but its hard to read
http://jcem.endojournals.org/cgi/content/abstract/86/10/4711
"Final height averaged 159.8 ± 7.6 cm in the 80 girls, which was significantly greater than pretreatment predicted height (149.3 ± 9.6 cm)"
That was for people who took the hormone blockers to stop puberty

BreastCancer, this one is somewhat less well documented but there is still a substantial amount of research :http://www.redorbit.com/news/health/1067387/earlyonset_puberty_puts_girls_at_risk_of_medical_problems/index.html

Its not really for people within the 10 and up normal range, its the 6,7,8 like I was. I know height isn't important but it would still be nice to be like 5'3 or 5'4. People don't take you seriously

@cbyrd: It was the girls father sadly