excuses

lil'bug

got a good excuse? post it here

dear sir/madam lil'bug can't go to work/school tomorrow because mexican midgets stole their shoes

Fago!

Dear Clouds!

Fuck OFF stealing my water!!!

Regards,

Fago!

iUseVi

I was going to win the lottery but the ash cloud won it instead.

redeight

Fago.
Sorted.

star.chaser

a mouse/the dog ate it. (my homework)

iUseVi

I couldn't make it into work because I woke up and could only see in monochrome. I got out of bed and was going to phone the doctor about it when a ferret attacked me! As I struggled with it I fell into the stove and accidentally turned it on. Just at that moment a bird flew into the room carrying a pineapple. A tortoise burst out of the inside of the pineapple and attacked the ferret. The bird then spontaneously exploded and made a mess over the kitchen. The tortoise threw the ferret onto the now hot stove and the smoke from this set off the fire alarm. Then my phone rang, and it was Fago! on the other end. I was so overjoyed that I forgot to turn off the stove and the house burned down. This is a true story. I DID NOT JUST SLEEP IN I SWEAR, WOULD I LIE? Also I am the king of Norway.

lil'bug

lil'bug can't go to work today because she has exploding diarrhea and can not leave the bathroom for fear of bum trauma

landsleaving

I can't make it to work today because I'm too busy thinking of excuses not to go to work tomorrow.

TinyMontgomery

I could not give birth today.

Because it is tuesday, Lord.

And tuesdays is mine day of rest (R&R)

So fondly, I say to you,

You must wait until the next day, for the child will be more formed then.


Scrumptious Apple(?) No!

Jummmmle

Cheap Thrills!

I can't come to work today as I am not drunk enough.

Matt Holck

if an ant wonders off
another will take its place

James T Kirk

iUseVi wrote: »

I couldn't make it into work because I woke up and could only see in monochrome. I got out of bed and was going to phone the doctor about it when a ferret attacked me! As I struggled with it I fell into the stove and accidentally turned it on. Just at that moment a bird flew into the room carrying a pineapple. A tortoise burst out of the inside of the pineapple and attacked the ferret. The bird then spontaneously exploded and made a mess over the kitchen. The tortoise threw the ferret onto the now hot stove and the smoke from this set off the fire alarm. Then my phone rang, and it was Fago! on the other end. I was so overjoyed that I forgot to turn off the stove and the house burned down. This is a true story. I DID NOT JUST SLEEP IN I SWEAR, WOULD I LIE? Also I am the king of Norway.

Troy thanks

Dear boss,

I cannot come to work today, as I appear to have mislaid my pants.

Matt Holck

Dear Boss

I don't believe that you are honest with me or others

I believe you do things to manipulate my responses

and don't believe you are properly serving your function

Deki

I am sorry but I can not attend the planned meeting, as Ace has eaten my shoes. Yes, all of them.
DeKi

James T Kirk

Dear boss,

I am sorry I can't turn in today, as it appears I am dead.

Sorry for this inconvenience, I shall try to rectify it as soon as possible.

Yours sincerely,

Dead Employee

joes girls

Hello Boss,

It's me, you know your best worker, the thing is, i know i told you i would work today, but i went for a swim in the sea cause it was so hot, and it looked so good, and everyone was going in, so i just really wanted to join them,just wanted to see what the water was like really, so i did, but something happened to me, not sure what it was,not sure where it came from, don't think it happened to anyone else, not sure really, but i got bitten by something, on my right cheek, my bum cheek not face one, but the thing is i cant sit down, yeah i know i stand in work all the time, but i cant get my pants on, yeah i know i could just wear a skirt, but my bum is big, well the right cheek is!

Hello.....Boss .....Hello .....where ya go??;)