Off The Menu. But why?

LegacyUser

We kissed last Saturday night, but - on Wednesday - she gave me the 'let's be friends' speech.

She and her ex (from 2 years ago) still have sex from time to time (whenever he gets drunk and shows up at her door at 4am) and - despite her protestations - I believe she wants him back. He's soon going to be a father and says he'll come back to her once the baby is born. She says she doesn't want him back. And, in the meantime, I've come along and we've gone out a few times and had great fun.

Now I try to move things to the next stage and it's all over. With the 'let's be friends' speech, no less!

My buddies think I'm well rid of this mess, but I think she's great (despite the crap and - hey - who of us doesn't bring some crap to the table). Gotta wonder if I should accept the 'let's be friends' speech for what it is, or is she trying to stay single for him. I know she was with someone last year for a couple of months (and they had sex once - lucky bastard ! but she ended that, too. Don't really know the details, I just assumed it didn't work out. Don't know much about her ex, either. Except her mate let slip that he showed up at her place (first time since Christmas, apparently) and they had sex about three weeks ago. She confirmed it.

Is that why I'm suddenly off the menu? Or am I really in the 'let's be friends' category?

minidazzler

Just accept it, it's not your problem and too much of a mess.

Whether or not it's for him she is staying away from you, she doesn't want you.

The only thing that will come of this is you with a wrecked head/broken heart.

Your friends are right.

Appleguy

Run away

legend365

Don't be a chump serisouly.

Have some respect for yourself.

She clearly doesn't.

unclecessna

Don't even bother taking up the ''let's be friends'' offer - it never gets you where you want to be from my experience and you will end up just feeling like sh1t.

It won't be a piece of cake but do your very best to move on ASAP and put this unfortunate mis-fire behind you.

G-Money

She sounds a bit like that head wrecker from 500 Day of Summer. Just forget about her and move on. Also don't accept the lets just be friends thing unless that is what you really want.

seenitall

Yup, headwrecker.

OP, move on for your own sanity. Nothing good will come off hanging around this woman. It is obvious you are too into her to be able to be friends with her, and as a further complication, she has some serious issues and has to sort out her own head in her own time. You are not part of the equation here in any shape or form anyway.

Motley Crue

ask yourself, do you just want to have sex with her, or do you want a relationship with her?

Thibor

Sounds to me like she's afraid to commit after it ending with her ex, and hoping to get him back. Sounds like he's just stringing her along.

You're best off out of it completely. If you're really into her and all she wants is to be mates, then sooner or later, you're going to get hurt, either by her getting back with the ex, or her starting to see somebody else.