How to stay friends after college?

sashafierce

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Agent J

College is great. 3/4 years and so many people coming and going. So many interests and stuff going on all based around a central place where you constantly run into people you know. Then one day. Everyone leaves.

It can be a tough adjustment but its one of those pesky life things you can't avoid( Unless you try to do a postgrad )

Its not a question of not speaking to people it just you dont run into people or have reason to be anywhere near then unless you want to. You find that the people who were aquaintences rather friends just drift away because the common draw(ie college) isnt there. The real friends are the people who do get in touch and try to make plans.

Thats what you can do. Make the effort with people who you consider actual friends and those who do likewise are the people worth keeping.

sashafierce

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Exclamation Marc

sashafierce wrote: »

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Yeah I know the feeling. I had some very close friends in college, dotted from all over the country. I know if we bumped into each other it'd be great fun, but the reality is we don't and I haven't talked to my closest in quite a while.

I think the trick is not to fool yourself, you won't stay in touch with everyone. As simplistic and maybe harsh as it sounds, pick who your best friends are from college and make the effort with them. From experience, reunions never happen, always too tough to put together and get everyone there. You'll probably have a handful of "great" college friends so make the effort with them. Try and arrange maybe you and one or two others visiting another from the same group.

But I agree it sucks how college relationships fall apart when you remove the one common aspect, just decide who means the most to you and run with that

sashafierce

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LegacyUser

sashafierce wrote: »

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Well that mightn't have been the case either. I went to college in dublin but one of my closest friends is one I met through college who lives in Kildare.

I felt just like you did when I left college but one of my friends started ringing me at the weekends for a catch up, we'd meet for drinks at christmas and birthdays, maybe get together for Paddy's day, things like that. But it takes staying in touch with regular catch up phone calls.

There's some guys from college who are still good friends that I don't really be in contact with. They've taken holidays together, climbed mountains, they have a common interest so they're still friends, though I don't know if they actually see each other that often. I don't know how they stayed in touch but I'd recommend just giving your friends a call to see how they're summer is going, if they're catching any festivals (maybe you could go with them?) just stay in touch with them. They'll probably never be as close as you were in college but in 10 years time the friends you keep now will still be around in times when you need them