No one seems to understand the meaning of a NERVOUS BREAKDOWN

LegacyUser

Ok, I really need to get this out of my system, and get a public opinion. I am currently having at nervous breakdown as a direct result of my employer treating me like absolute S*it for a few years. My symptoms are as follows -

Disinterest in work or family life
Disinterest in social life or alienation from previously close friends and family
Sleep disruption or much longer periods of sleep
Significant changes in appetite, such as eating too little or too much
Feelings of persistent anxiety or panic attacks
Thoughts of dying or wish to die
Having flashbacks to a prior traumatic event
Increasing dependence on alcohol
Inability/and ABSOLUTE DISINTEREST to pursue a normal life, normal activities or normal relationships

I can't sleep, feel absolutely worthless, and can't leave my room and even face the world. I am also suffering with severe anxiety and depression. No one in my family seems to be able to understand or grasp what I am going through, and seem to think because "They can't see it, I'm ok"...... The same applied to my friend this evening. I told her how I was feeling, and the reason I am having a nervous breakdown is because of my employer and they DELIBERATELY drove me to it. Because my family are old fashioned, (My parents) and are like "Snap out of it", when it is alot more difficult than that. My parents DO NOT understand what I am going through, and I have even had suicidal thoughts (With the medication I have been put on....either that or its a part of a nervous breakdown???)
One of my best friends came over this evening, and I told her how I was currently feeling. She was understanding in a way but made me feel worse because she told me what she has gone through in her life (Her dad dying a few years ago) and although that is incrediably significant, and upsetting, she made me feel like "Deal with it, or get on with it".
I am so upset with my friend at the moment, and feel so much worse. I intend to take my case against my employer to The High Court because of how they have deliberately destroyed my life. I am a young enough girl, I have absolutely NO enjoyment in life, don't feel like leaving the house, and as for a boyfriend.....I don't think anyone could deal with me and my upset at the moment, which is horrible because altthough I am upset I would love to have someone around who could love, understand, and support me SO MUCH. One of my closest friends deserted me a few months ago, because he thought I was "obsessed with taking my employer to court", and "Too ill, to do so". To this day I miss him so much.
I know alot of people are currently unemployed, and have severe mortage pressures etc, but this is absolutely killing me at present. I feel like no one understands the meaning of nervous breakdown, because it can't be seen, and is in a person themselves, and its absolute hell. I don't know if I am asking for advice or just to get this out of my system. I don't know how to get through this "Hell" and try and get my life back....I'm going back to work in a few weeks, and I still intend to take the case to The High Court to get some form of justice....Anyone any advice as to how to get out of this hole in spite of the fact I am going back to work for my employer in a few weeks? I am seeing a psychiatrist, who to date has not been very helpful (May I also state Mental Health Services in this country are absolute S*hit)

PK2008

If your employer is ruining your life then why are you going back to work for them?

I know we're in a recession but if your job is making you have suicidal thoughts then dont you think you should leave it?

You're already seeking help which is good, but from your post I sense a lot for blaming of other people, putting all the fault on them for your problems. Ok people could be a little more sensitive but the fact that you are going back to work for the place that is causing you to have a nervous breakdown doesnt really make sense, or did I read it wrong?

slowmoe

i really don't mean to be offensive but from your post it sounds like you've diagnosed yourself. if this is the case then surely you can understand how people around you might not get it. i honestly think you need to go to your gp, tell him you believe you are suffering a mental breakdown and get referred to someone that can properly handle this. You would then be able to obtain a cert to say you're too ill for work for a while and hopefully you could use this time in counselling to recover and gain a clearer perspective on life and what your actions should be re employer, family, friends, suicide etc.

I know its obvious but there is a reason help is out there, because genuinely sometimes people need it, please use it

TitoPuente

Can you let us know what kind of treatment your employers are subjecting you to exactly?

LegacyUser

Hi op,

You are absolutely right there is something called a nervous breakdown that doesn't look like a person crying in a corner.

I know how you feel but the worst part of all this is you feel alone because none of your friends realise whats happening.

for them to see takes a long time sad but true because we all get used to our friends and family's faults we see these things as a "phase" so please don't hate your family or friends just yet.

OK to help you theres a few things to sort out first do you loe your job? Is it worth fighting for or are you in a position to fight for it?

are you able to fight for it ? I don't mean physically? but mentally you're past breaking point so think long and hard are you able to start a battle that you are determined to win to stop being treated like s**t and get the respect you deserve?

how low are you prepared to go? I had to go very low to win my war dirty wasn't the word but ya know what I won I was right and when me and god see that well be sipping scotch reminiscing on the times and things we done (nothing illegal btw).

If you can answer these I'll post back with my user name and help you out. I've been here and atm I've a mate who's going through hell between her job husband (mistress I don't know what the masculine of mistress is) and kids Jesus I taught I had it bad when I compare my life to hers I won the lotto.

So first thing to do is:

A. Give in and accept this is life and you can sit and cry about it.

B. Fight defend yourself mentally and gain the upper hand all these bullies make huge mistakes you just need to know how to spot them, log them and bring it to the right persons attention.

I hope you'll be OK.

Denimgirl

My Heart goes out to you I was in the exact same position as you until I accepted my redundancy it went on for over a year with a woman in my job.she was constantly trying to ge me sacked because I had a good position and was there longer than her she was very jealous but she did it in a very cunning way she acted as a friend then say bitchy things behind my back to management and it was all said back to me,it made me very depressed indeed.I think you should report the person who is making your life a misery,write valid reasons down how the person has spoke to you and treated you and be strong i did it before i left and i felt great i did'nt realise that everybody in the company did'nt like her either!please don't waste your precious life feeling like this.if it all gets too much take a holiday and relax feel free to pm me anytime as i really know what your going through your not alone but you can bounce back from this believe me.

Good Luck

DG

katie99

I'm sorry to hear of your situation.
I would suggest you talk to your GP and ask to be referred to a counsellor who will understand and listen to your situation. Also, ask your GP to consider the medication you are on and maybe change it.
Try to compartmentalise your anxieties.
I would suggest you contact a solicitor to discuss taking your company to the High Court. Remember, it is very expensive.
I would suggest suing among other things for constructive dismissal.
If you are a member of a trade union speak to the relevant person.
And if not have a look at Siptu's website and the laws surrounding bullying.
Try to take exercise each day be it walking, swimming,cycling or going to the gym. It can be a great stress buster.
Don't expect family or friends to be understanding. You have to work this one out for yourself.
Don't rely or depend on others.
If you would like a boyfriend then put yourself around socially, pubs, clubs friends.
I know it is difficult right now but if you begin to adopt a more positive attitude you will get through this depressing period in your life.
Best of luck,