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Engagement Ring Help/Advise

  • 03-05-2010 5:29pm
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 802 ✭✭✭


    I am looking for some help in the following matter.

    I am going out with my girlfriend for almost 3 and a half years and I have been thinking about it for a while, and I have finally decided I want to ask her to marry me.

    Now, what I am stuck on is do I buy a ring myself in the jewellers, and what if she does not like it, or does not fit properly, or do I get a small cheap ring ???

    what have other people done in my situation. I cant ask her friends as one of them will let the cat of the bag knowing them, want it to be a total surprise and shock to her.

    Any help be appreciated.


Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 277 ✭✭namurt


    It's a tough one alright. My fiance got my ring without me knowing and it's perfect. However he was pretty sneaky and brought me into a jewellers on the pretence that he needed to get his watch fixed and stood beside the engagement rings to see which ones I'd look at. It was too big so had to be brought back and resized, but apart from me being impatient that didn't take from it at all.

    I would also have been happy with getting a really cheap ring as a symbol (and when I say cheap I mean it, like a Claire's Accessories type thing) and then going to choose a ring together the following day.

    I think though if you're really not sure about what style she would like and you've no way of finding out then the second option would be better. This will probably sound really shallow but the last thing you want is her being unhappy with something she's going to wear for the rest of her life.


  • Administrators, Business & Finance Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 16,978 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Toots


    If you're planning on buying the ring in advance, check with the jewelers what their return/exchange policy is, in case she doesn't like the ring you choose. Explain what you're planning, I'm sure they've had the question before. To get her ring size, you could wait til she's asleep and use a piece of string, wrap it around her ring finger, and bring that to the jeweler. You should also check with the jeweler whether the ring you like can be resized incase the sizing is not quite right.

    You could also get a token ring or a costume ring and then bring her shopping to choose the real one. My fiancé proposed with a lovely bunch of roses, then we went out together to choose the ring. Best of luck with whatever you decide.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,653 ✭✭✭✭amdublin


    Has she ever dropped hints? Or have any of friends of hers got engaged and she mentioned that she liked the way they did it or she'd prefer do it different etc???

    I think you have two options:
    1. You get the ring but make sure that the jeweller will exchange if it is not right
    2. Propose with a "fun" token ring from Claires / or a costume ring from Marks & Spencers (€20) and then go pick the actual ring together

    Well done and Good luck!!!!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 277 ✭✭namurt


    Just thought I'd add to what Toots said. You should be aware that not all rings can be resized easily, although I'm sure the jewellers would tell you that anyway.


  • Administrators, Business & Finance Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 16,978 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Toots


    Yes, if you're worried about getting the wrong size, from what I've heard a solitaire is the easiest to resize if you're not sure, although definitely double check with the jeweler before you buy. My ring has three diamonds, and then little diamonds on the 'shoulders' of the band. When we were buying it the jeweler said to us to make 100% sure it was going to be the right size, because due to the diamonds on the shoulders it could only be taken down about 1/2 a size or less, otherwise it would ruin the ring. It couldn't be sized up at all.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 724 ✭✭✭shapez


    The easiest thing to do is get a mock ring on ebay or something for about 20-30 euros. Then after you've popped the question you can decide where to go and get your real engagement ring. I would recommend Amsterdam or Antwerp. If you plan it you can pop the question while on a weekend break over there and buy the ring for so much less than what you pay here.

    Good Luck!!
    Rebel1977 wrote: »
    I am looking for some help in the following matter.

    I am going out with my girlfriend for almost 3 and a half years and I have been thinking about it for a while, and I have finally decided I want to ask her to marry me.

    Now, what I am stuck on is do I buy a ring myself in the jewellers, and what if she does not like it, or does not fit properly, or do I get a small cheap ring ???

    what have other people done in my situation. I cant ask her friends as one of them will let the cat of the bag knowing them, want it to be a total surprise and shock to her.

    Any help be appreciated.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,068 ✭✭✭tfak85


    i had always planned on getting my ring made as i had stones from my mother that i wanted used so when my boyfriend was ready to ask me he went and got a claires accessory ring, unfortunatly it was huge (it fit him) and so we went to accessorise to get a new temp ring until mine was ready...
    i would say definitely go with the cheapy fun ring first with the intention of having her choose the real one...i have a friend who is unhappy with her engagement ring and it's not a good feeling....

    best of luck!!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,326 ✭✭✭BC


    There are lots of threads with differing opinions on this.
    I would have HATED if my fiance bought a ring for me, I wanted to pick it myself. However it is up to individual choice/opinion.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,653 ✭✭✭✭amdublin


    shapez wrote: »
    The easiest thing to do is get a mock ring on ebay or something for about 20-30 euros.

    You don't even need to go to ebay. There are mock/costume rings (that look like diamond engagement rings) in:

    Marks & Spencers
    Oasis
    Accessorise
    River Island


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 364 ✭✭superleedsdub


    BC wrote: »
    There are lots of threads with differing opinions on this.
    I would have HATED if my fiance bought a ring for me, I wanted to pick it myself. However it is up to individual choice/opinion.

    I would deffo go with the plan of getting a cheap dress ring first then go in with your girlfriend. I knew what ring my OH wanted but we decided to go in together to pick a ring out (she knew i was proposing this year but had no clue what exact date) and we tried on the type of ring she wanted but it didn`t look great on her finger - we ended up getting a ring we both loved that we would never have thought of buying......


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