Any experience welcome

LegacyUser

I am not sure if this is the right forum.
My partner and I really want a family-he would have as many as possible but I want to start with one and see how it goes! We are hoping to begin "trying" in the next year or so, after we are married.

I have just been told my smear test has come back abnormal and I need to go in for further tests. I am totally shattered. My partner is only the second person I've been with, and I have never had any unprotected sex. I feel like I am being punished for being intimate with someone else. I know this sounds insane but I did not have sex until I was in my late 20s because I wanted to be careful, I've only been with two men and now I have problems.
It just seems so unfair; friends of mine have gotten pregnant without any problems, no STDs or anything. Why am I the one who has to go through this when I looked after my body and made sure not to be with anyone and everyone? I was so careful every time and I still have to go through this.

I am very sorry if this is OT but I am really worried that I will have problems trying to conceive and its my fault for sleeping with someone before I met my partner who I want to marry.

Thanks for reading.

Das Kitty

Cervical cancer is not always caused by the sexually transmitted HPV. Nothing like it! And an abnormal smear is far far from having cervical cancer, smears can be returned abnormal for lots of reasons, for example being too close to your period.

You are not being punished, you have done nothing wrong. Hopefully all will be ok with your follow up tests, but even if you do need treatment it doesn't mean you won't be able to concieve either.

Please stop beating yourself up. Xxx

barbiegirl

I have found that when it comes to a smear test, don't have sex for 3 or 4 days before as sometimes this brings back the abnormal result. I've had exactly what you had have and it's all good, last three smears normal.
It's a shock but hopefully, especially given your age you'll be fine.

xzanti

What reading did you get? I got a CIN1 about a year ago, went back after 3 months for a retest and it came back normal so try not to get to wound up, I know it is a shock and it sends alarm bells ringing but it's quite common.. I know a few girls who've had to go for the Cholposcopy (sp?) and they're still in fine working order after it and can still have kids etc.. This is the reason for the smears, to catch things early on before they become a problem.. Best of luck anyway

LegacyUser

Hi, thanks for replies.
My doctor did not seem too worried, he said its a viral abnormality which may clear up on its own.
My concern is that I have a very poor immune system (due to genetics) and that I may have put my fertility at risk because of having premarital relations, I could kick myself for being with one other guy before my partner, but he is very supportive and says I am worrying way too much.
I am just upset because a friend of mine who has been with lots of guys (her choice, fair play if she is happy) had a STD scare and came back totally clean and is now having baby number two.
I feel like I should be rewarded for waiting so long and not being with lots of guys, not punished with this worry.

crazy cat lady

My friend had an abnormal smear last year, was waiting for a date for colpscopy and got pregnant! She'll be having her little one next week!

An abnormal smear does not necessarily directly relate to how many sexual partners you've had, in many cases it can be genetic. Maybe speak to some of the women in your family to see if they have ever had abnormal smear tests. It might help put your mind at rest.

Don't be beating yourself up about having a partner before your husband! Fair play to you for being so sensible and careful

SMCG

Hi there
When I was about 23 I had an abnormal smear test. Another one 6 months later was fine. I have been very careful about going every 2 years since the clear one to make sure, but it's never caused me any ongoing problems.