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Fighting

  • 28-04-2010 7:00am
    #1
    pump it
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 33 ✭


    hey everyone. i am just writing to see if anyone can help me.

    me and my boyfriend have fights now and then. i do stuff and say things without even thinking. the stuff i say or do arent that bad. but when i do he goes mad and shouts at me. i ask him not to shout but he says thats the only way to get through to me. is that true? we broke up a few months ago cause of it. now we are bak together he is doing it al over again. if anyone has any advice it would be great. thanks a mil.


Comments

  • #2
    How Strange
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,339 ✭✭✭How Strange


    You're acting like a pair of bratty children.

    Act like adults, respect each other, don't shout, don't antagonise and there'll be no need to fight.


  • #3
    Peggypeg
    Closed Accounts Posts: 578 ✭✭✭Peggypeg


    Hey OP,

    Do you enjoy the drama of the fights? I'm not sure why you would get back with someone like that.

    However, here's what to do:
    The next time he shouts at you, say "I'm not prepared to allow you to shout at me, I'm going for a walk, if you are calm when I get back we can discuss this like adults but if you shout again I'm leaving". Don't shout when you say this, say it quietly, when someone talks quietly the other person automatically quiets down so they can hear. When you've said that go out for a 20 minute walk, if he's still shouting when you get back go for another walk and so on. To be honest with you, you sound like you enjoy being the victim, if I'm right well the best of luck with it, if you don't enjoy being a victim leave him for good this time.


  • #4
    Maguined
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,247 ✭✭✭Maguined


    Can you give more detail on what kinds of things you are saying or doing?

    If he his shouting over the tiniest little thing then you should walk, if you are doing things to hurt him then while the shouting is still not ideal it can be a pretty normal emotional response depending on the stimulus causing it.


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