New (fake) jobs

landsleaving

In this, the era of unemployment, I think we should all invent some jobs for ourselves. (Before our new benevolent dictator Fago! has us reclaiming marshaes or building autobahns for the motherland)

I shall be (for now) Vice President, no no, Junior executive vice president of penguin and lemur affairs at the international bureau of cuteness.

Deki

I'll just carry round the "sunshine baskets" and hand out the courtesy advertising calendars and discount coupons to all the new neighbors, moving into all the empty houses that have been put up for sale after the foreclosures. "Kay???:)

Matt Holck

the information revolution has put a whole class of receptionist out of work

I think they should build fan sites for their favorite band

the distribution of wealth has become more centralized with automation

sNarah

I want one with a fancy title and loads of abbreviations behind it.

Mmmh. How about "Senior Executive Directing Manager, Dr. Esq. LIIPP, Bach."

Yeah I like it.

As for Fago!'s domination, I will put in a written application to be minister of trade and enterprise and foreign affairs.

sNarah

"Senior Executive Directing Manager, Dr. Esq. LIIPP, Bach."

Job Description

- Be able to look very important and busy at all times.
- Organise/Attend plenty of meetings, preferably set in cultural and excited surrounds, e.g. Roganstown Golf Club and Country House, Café en Seine, Powerscourt Gardens, etc etc.
- Be entitled to extravagant wages without ever having to explain what exactly your job entails.
- Be able to interfere with peoples thoughts and therefore subconciously convinsing them that your way is better, no matter what.
- Never answer telephones, rather ask your assistant to say you are to busy.
- Have an attractive but slighty dumb assistant.

cyberwolf77

I am already Captain of The Latverian Royal Guard.

Deki

I'm something Latverian, I sent Spot out to protect the borders. No reason I
can't be the sunshine lady. Let's have some pina coladas they're sunny. OOh! I must have a coupon for that ... Somewhere. (Hey! Sunshine lady beats crazy cat lady!:p)

sNarah

Did I hear Coupons???

Solitaire

I'm Director of Defense. I think "Director" sounds more sinister and manly than "Secretary"

sNarah helps out of course, being the head of R&D. I'm expecting great things from the Portable DIY Crab Foodstuff Robot...

Deki

Well, in addition to "Sunshine Lady" (yes coupons - for movies, for dinner out, for groceries, shoes, discounts discounts. address books from the local undertaker, advertising pens from the bank, oh and note pads from the state representative) I have recently accepted the job as Fago's personal bodyguard. Impressive. Huh?

Solitaire

No... you're just the Sunshine Lady silly!

SSSHHHH!!!!!!!! The reason you're Fago's last line of defense is because no-one expects the Sunshine Lady to actually have seven PhDs in the school of ass-kicking and be a powerful summoner to boot! But if you keep flappin' that trap you'll ruin the element of surprise!!!

Deki

It's no fun to be a Sgt. if I can't tell anyone.:( If any one gives me any trouble I'm tossing them in the jello pit.:)

Matt Holck

Manager has a nice ring to it

Matt Holck

Selected Job Category: Arts, Design, Entertainment, Media >Writers and Editors > Poets and Lyricists
Enter a Job Title:

precision and clarity expert

kerash

I has a job

Matt Holck

http://icanhascheezburger.com/2009/01/30/funny-pictures-smell-just-stopped-working-altogether/

Solitaire

Deki wrote: »

If any one gives me any trouble I'm tossing them in the jello pit.:)

No no no! :rolleyes: Troublemakers go in the Cthulhu pit!! Hot women go in the jello pit! :D

cyberwolf77

Deki wrote: »

I'm something Latverian, I sent Spot out to protect the borders. No reason I
can't be the sunshine lady. Let's have some pina coladas they're sunny. OOh! I must have a coupon for that ... Somewhere. (Hey! Sunshine lady beats crazy cat lady!:p)

Warrant Officer of Royal Latverian Air Corps ring a bell?

Deki

nope. doesn't. don't remember a title of any kind. said go patrol borders. So Spot and I flew around and around and around... then we got hungry. We still check... but so far (since that squirrel girl incident) nothing...:mad:

cyberwolf77

People need to check the duty thread better.....

Deki

I guess that you mean me ?

Glenster

cyberwolf77 wrote: »

People need to check the duty thread better.....

Heh heh heh.........'Duty'

cyberwolf77

Deki wrote: »

I guess that you mean me ?

Yes, I do

Deki

cyberwolf77 wrote: »

Yes, I do

all right- so you were right and i was wrong. (sorry)

cyberwolf77

No, I just forgot to insert your rank

Deki

:eek: so you edited just before I looked!
well it's nice to know I'm not losing it:pac:

cyberwolf77

Yeah, I is sneaky

Deki

YES WOLF, YOU IS!

sNarah

Solitaire wrote: »

I'm Director of Defense. I think "Director" sounds more sinister and manly than "Secretary"

sNarah helps out of course, being the head of R&D. I'm expecting great things from the Portable DIY Crab Foodstuff Robot...

On it.

have the prototype nearly finished. I think I shall name them FaRoGo-crabs!"

Deki wrote: »

Well, in addition to "Sunshine Lady" (yes coupons - for movies, for dinner out, for groceries, shoes, discounts discounts. address books from the local undertaker, advertising pens from the bank, oh and note pads from the state representative) I have recently accepted the job as Fago's personal bodyguard. Impressive. Huh?

I'll have one of each pretty please.

Deki

Hands sNarah basket of coupons and samples, Tied with big boiw. Oh and just fill this out and tell them how pleasant and helpful I was, spreading the sunshine and all. (or it's into the jello pit with you.)

sNarah

*in soft monotonous voice*

Deki is the best Sunshine lady in the world.
She spreads sunshine like no one else.
She made me so happy, happy like never before.
The big bow was really nice also.

I am so happy...



*cries a little*