unofficial wedding in hotel

scary

Hi all,

I'm getting married next year and plan just imediate family ( approx 13 ) and the idea is take them all away to a hotel for the weekend, get married and eat in the restaurant of the hotel and stay a couple of nights, now as we will be just guests, does anyone know how this would effect a hotels 1 wedding a day policy if there was another wedding on? it will be obvious we have been married and would like to have a small wedding cake, should we say something to the hotel or say nothing, has anyone any experience of this?

rgds
Cormac

tinkerbell

I'm assuming you plan on getting married in the actual hotel yah? Are you just planning on booking a small conference room in the hotel or something and having the ceremony there?

Not sure if you'd need to say anything.

namurt

We are also having a very small wedding. We enquired in one hotel about getting a table in the restaurant and all seemed fine until the woman we were speaking to went off to confirm it and was told that since there was a wedding on that day she couldn't book us in, I was shocked. All we were looking for was a large table in the restaurant area.

So basically, be prepared to be turned away if you do mention that it's a wedding.

houseman

The main question is, are you going to be wearing a wedding dress and full bridal party rig out? If so, then its the dilema of having two brides on one day.

If you're keeping it all low key and simple, and B&G are not wearing formal wedding outfits, then it probably wont be a problem. You'll just look like any other family party.

You have to look at it from the other bridal parties point of view and the hotels as well - if they've promised the other couple a one-wedding a day policy, then the other bride wont be best pleased to find out there's another wedding party in on the day.

BC

Agree with houseman. If you are dressed up in wedding outfits then I think you should inform the hotel, more out of courtesy for other couples than to protect the hotel.

LBD

Hi there,

My only experience of it was when we were looking into getting married in Carton House she said they couldn't guarantee "exclusivity" to us as a year or two ago a bride and groom booked into the restaurant and turned up in full bridal rig out etc etc. This obviously caused distress to the other bride (who had booked her wedding in the hotel) and Carton House had to compensate her accordingly. As far as I'm aware nothing happened to the "restaurant" bride but it was all very akward and not a nice atmosphere for a wedding day I would assume. As a result Carton House had to change their "one wedding a day policy" to cover themselves in case it ever happened again. I probably haven't helped you at all sorry but thats what I know about it

seamus

Obviously if you're going to arrive in full wedding gear, then yes as others have said, you are better off mentioning it.

Not least for your own protection. In the case that another bride has booked the wedding for the day, you have no idea who she is and what kind of people are at the wedding. It could end in violence. No, really.

On the other hand, if you're only a small party in formalish gear, I can't see a problem with just turning up. For your own comfort though, you might be better off with a private dining room than being out in the main restaurant.

artyeva

apologies for digging up an old thread but can someone answer me something i just cannot get my head around...?

there's some people in this thread dismissing it as a complete no-no as if the reason why is a given. i don't get it. why on earth would a bride be upset at having another bride in the hotel on the same day, even though one of them presumably would be in a function room and the other would be having a quiet dinner in the restaurant????

smelltheglove

artyeva wrote: »

apologies for digging up an old thread but can someone answer me something i just cannot get my head around...?

there's some people in this thread dismissing it as a complete no-no as if the reason why is a given. i don't get it. why on earth would a bride be upset at having another bride in the hotel on the same day, even though one of them presumably would be in a function room and the other would be having a quiet dinner in the restaurant????

Im not sur emyself, I thin every bride wants to feel like the most beuatiful and important person in the world on their wedding day, some would be a little put off knowing that they are not, that there is someone else just as important. Then there are other things such as guests comparing the dresses, the fact they would not have exclusive access to the venue for photography etc.

Southsider1

artyeva wrote: »

apologies for digging up an old thread but can someone answer me something i just cannot get my head around...?

there's some people in this thread dismissing it as a complete no-no as if the reason why is a given. i don't get it. why on earth would a bride be upset at having another bride in the hotel on the same day, even though one of them presumably would be in a function room and the other would be having a quiet dinner in the restaurant????

It probably wouldn't bother the lads but the brides would feel inadequate...

artyeva

smelltheglove wrote: »

Im not sur emyself, I thin every bride wants to feel like the most beuatiful and important person in the world on their wedding day, some would be a little put off knowing that they are not, that there is someone else just as important. Then there are other things such as guests comparing the dresses, the fact they would not have exclusive access to the venue for photography etc.

hey rachel!! thanks for replying
i see what yer saying, maybe i'm just missing that diva bridezilla gene... but i mean seriously who on earth would care about people comparing dresses, or thinking that they're not the most important person in the world!! are you supposed to be that conceited when you get married? and surely every couple who would ever have got married at that hotel/venue would have similar photographs, as they were standing in roughly the same places

Southsider1 wrote: »

It probably wouldn't bother the lads but the brides would feel inadequate...

i see what yer saying, maybe i'm just missing that gene... i'm only engaged a few weeks and seriously - there is a whole other world of irish wedding bulls**t that is completely alien to me - and my OH....it's a minefield

suzieled

artyeva wrote: »

but i mean seriously who on earth would care about people comparing dresses, .....and surely every couple who would ever have got married at that hotel/venue would have similar photographs, as they were standing in roughly the same places

I never ever thught this was a problem for me. When I went looking at venues, we finally found one we liked and they told us based on the dates we picked there was a very strong liklihood that there would be a second wedding on in the hotel that day, as they had another room that could hold 150 people. I didnt have a problem with this but after thinking about it for the next 2 weeks, it started to play on my mind. I cant really put my finger on it,as to what it was, but it was more a combination of a number of smaller things. So booked a place where there was only 1 wedding a day. Its one day where a lot of money will be spent, so its nice to at least have the place for your wedding gang.

BC

I've insisted that its in my contract that there is only 1 wedding in the hotel (its hotel policy anyway).
Two reasons really, firstly I don't want guests ending up at the wrong wedding! I've been at a wedding before where that happened and where people were wandering from one function room into another depending on what the queue for the bar was like. I'd like my wedding to only have my guests at it!

The second reason is that a wedding puts a lot of pressure on the hotel at the best of times. I'd be wary about the ability of any hotel to pull off two weddings with ease from the perspective of managing the kitchen, the service etc.