What am I doing wrong?

LegacyUser

right try to keep this short and sweet. if a guy soesnt text back in three days does that mean he aint interested??
and if he does text what will i say?

Wompa1

If I was you I would tell him where to go if he texts back. He's playing games with ya. The whole rules of dating bull. In the long run your better off without a douche like that. Boys play games, not men.

andreac

Hes obv not that bothered if he cant reply to you for 3 days.

Trust me, if a guy is interested he will be in touch. Ive learned the hard way too.

krudler

I'd completely lose interest in anyone who plays by these ludicrous "rules" that sh1t is for 13 year olds not grown adults. People have been watching too many crappy American reality shows and now we cant express things like normal people anymore, it has to be on a set timeframe or else it means you're either crazy or not interested. move on.

LegacyUser

its gas cause he wanted us to be exculsive and i havent been with anybody else. think he playing me for a fool. any tips on how to stop checking my fone every 2 mins!!!!

Lucyx

satc83 wrote: »

its gas cause he wanted us to be exculsive and i havent been with anybody else. think he playing me for a fool. any tips on how to stop checking my fone every 2 mins!!!!

i know you can drive yourself crazy checking the phone non stop
this will pass in a couple of days, don't worry.

whatsamsn

The whole "waiting rule" is BS.
Its basic human psychology - if someone is interested in you they would text/call or make time for you. Aka, they let you know.

If we throw Logic into the mix what does that also give us? - It only takes seconds to write a text.

So screw him Op Next time you are in contact with him - blank him.

Ickle Magoo

Three days isn't very long not be in contact with someone you are just starting a relationship with. Did you text him with a direct question?

LegacyUser

Ickle Magoo wrote: »

Three days isn't very long not be in contact with someone you are just starting a relationship with. Did you text him with a direct question?

I think this too. If you texted him with a direct question and he hasn't gotten back, move on and find someone who'll treat you better.
If you haven't texted him with a direct question however, well then I suggest you should text and ask him how his week is going. If he doesn't reply, move on and find someone who'll treat you with basic respect

G-Money

satc83 wrote: »

its gas cause he wanted us to be exculsive and i havent been with anybody else. think he playing me for a fool. any tips on how to stop checking my fone every 2 mins!!!!

Turn the phone off. Seriously. I do that when I find myself checking it too much if I'm hoping a girl will text or something. The world won't end, contrary to popular belief!

I agree, this whole 3 day rule is a just a myth which has become an unwritten rule, curteousy of tv and films. If you like someone, let them know, if you don't, move on. If you're being messed around, move on. There's no need to make things more complicated than they need to be, although I'm convinced that some people love the drama of it all.

People need to stop pretending they're living in a film or in Sex and the City.

LegacyUser

grandmaster wrote: »

People need to stop pretending they're living in a film or in Sex and the City.

I really don't get what you mean by this reference to Sex and the City. I can only assume you've never actually watched it because the women in this program/film are pioneers of forgetting about men and moving on. It's also an extremely well written comedy, and totally turned on it's head the notion that women are supposed to be invisible/heading for spinsterhood if they're not married by the age of thirty.

Viva Sex and the City! : )

LegacyUser

unregistered wrote: »

I really don't get what you mean by this reference to Sex and the City. I can only assume you've never actually watched it because the women in this program/film are pioneers of forgetting about men and moving on. It's also an extremely well written comedy, and totally turned on it's head the notion that women are supposed to be invisible/heading for spinsterhood if they're not married by the age of thirty.

Viva Sex and the City! : )

You have just proved his point. SATC is a tv programme. It is not real life. God help some woman if they feel they need a made up tv programme to change peoples perceptions and give they a guide how to behave. Woman should forge their own path not imitate a silly tv series, that from a man's opinion makes woman look like their who lives are obcessed about men and they can't survive without them.

gavney1

OP, I'd give him one more chance

Ordinarily, I never play the "3 day rule". But I'd been burned by girls in the past when they hadn't texted me back when I'd texted the next day

So, a few months ago, I stupidly tried the "3 day rule" with a girl I really really liked. I regretted it, it was stupid, and it probably turned her off me slightly


You never know, he may have been burned by a few girls recently and may be reacting to it.
So, give the guy another chance IF he texts back. But I'd be on your guard

LegacyUser

dfgdfgdfgd wrote: »

You have just proved his point. SATC is a tv programme. It is not real life. God help some woman if they feel they need a made up tv programme to change peoples perceptions and give they a guide how to behave. Woman should forge their own path not imitate a silly tv series, that from a man's opinion makes woman look like their who lives are obcessed about men and they can't survive without them.

Relax the kacks, a woman can watch a tv programme without getting swallowed up whole by it.

If you think it's had a negative impact that's your own business, but don't assume that just because a woman doesn't act the way you think she should that it's all down to Sex and the City putting ideas in her head. Women have a lot more going on in their lives, believe it or not

CBFi

I read this somewhere recently:

"If a guy isnt into you, you'll be 'confused', if he does, you'll know."

So, dont play his games and move on.

LegacyUser

update!
he texted al 11 last nite giving me some cock and bull story saying he was busy and his cousin is home from america i actually burst out laughing when i read it this morning.

so i havent text back and im pretty much turned off him now

LegacyUser

satc83 wrote: »

update!
he texted al 11 last nite giving me some cock and bull story saying he was busy and his cousin is home from america

Did you text him asking him a question and it took him three days to get back? If so, then you're right and it is just a cock and bull story and he's giving you the run around!

If he just hadn't been in contact for three days, then his story is very plausible

LegacyUser

Right, i dont know whether it's too harsh.

but replying a txt does not take you too many time. A minute or two is more than enough.

even OP was not asking a question and was just chit chatting, I did not think if the guy sincerely interested and wanted her would save that two minutes a day to reply and show his interest.

LegacyUser

i should be shot!!! did the typical girl thing and texted him last nite i was tipsy. as soon as i sent it i regretted it as of course he never textd me back so at least i know for 100% now that he a complete and utter knob who wouldnt know a good thing if it hit him in the gonads

you live and learn

mrsdewinter

satc83 wrote: »

at least i know for 100% now that he a complete and utter knob who wouldnt know a good thing if it hit him in the gonads

you live and learn

Cool... lesson learned! Onwards & upwards now

LegacyUser

Plausible wrote: »

but replying a txt does not take you too many time. A minute or two is more than enough.

I'm not so sure about that! Got a text from a girl yesterday that I quite like - took a bloody age before I was happy with what response I sent back.

Jaxxy

satc83 wrote: »

i should be shot!!! did the typical girl thing and texted him last nite i was tipsy. as soon as i sent it i regretted it as of course he never textd me back so at least i know for 100% now that he a complete and utter knob who wouldnt know a good thing if it hit him in the gonads

you live and learn

Good woman yourself! As others have said, chalk this one up to experience and move on. I'm always absolutely confounded by that "three day rule" malark. If you truly like someone you'll let them know at the first available opportunity. Anyone who "plays games" or tries to play it too cool is a huge turn off for me.

Recently a guy I met in a bar tried the "three day rule" on me. Met him on a Saturday, he called on the following Tuesday. As soon as I realised who it was I laughed and deleted his number.

Jaxxy

Entitled wrote: »

I'm not so sure about that! Got a text from a girl yesterday that I quite like - took a bloody age before I was happy with what response I sent back.

There's a difference between taking some time to write a well-thought text (thirty minutes at the most, say) and waiting two-three days before you even think about responding.

Good luck with your girl!

G-Money

I was recently in a situation where I was texting a girl and I'd send her a text and for a day or two she wouldn't reply. This happened a few times and she'd always say she was franticly busy etc. But my own rule is, if you have enough time to stop and read a text, you have enough time to reply. If you don't reply, it's because you don't want to make the time. Simple as that.

gavney1

JaxxYChicK wrote: »

Good woman yourself! As others have said, chalk this one up to experience and move on. I'm always absolutely confounded by that "three day rule" malark. If you truly like someone you'll let them know at the first available opportunity. Anyone who "plays games" or tries to play it too cool is a huge turn off for me.

Recently a guy I met in a bar tried the "three day rule" on me. Met him on a Saturday, he called on the following Tuesday. As soon as I realised who it was I laughed and deleted his number.

Well, I have to offer the counterpoint to this. I agree, that 90% of the time if a guy uses the "3 day rule" he's either a knob or isn't interested.

But as I said above - I used the "three day rule" recently with a girl I really liked and regretted it. The REASON i did it was because I'd gotten numbers off girls a couple of times before that, had texted them the next day, and not gotten any reply. So, I was wary of texting the next day, thinking that maybe it seemed too needy

I know it's stupid (and personally I'll never ever do it again) - but you have to remember that most guys have at some stage met a girl they like - gotten her number, texted her the next day, only to be blanked completely. So, the 3 day rule is a natural reaction to this (albeit a stupid one)

Having said that, it IS more likely that the guy is a knob-end or isn't that interested, but just want to point out that sometimes there's more to it

LegacyUser

if it takes you a day to think how to reply a txt... (it's not a letter!), i would say, um, you are not interested in the girl enough to reply her eagerly... or, um, you are too nervous to the girl? r u inexperience in communication so you need a day to reply a simple txt?!?!?!?

no offence, just could not understand why it takes a day (not even three days!) to reply a txt.

for me, if i can't get the reply the same day, i would pretty say that person does not like me much. no harm to be friends, but i know where i stand then.

if you truly like a girl, you would eagerly want to contact with her... you would not be able to hold the other day.

maybe i am harsh, but, it puts me off if i can't get my txt reply the same day. if he is busy, simply txt to tell he's busy would be fine. not even a txt reply and ignoring for a day or more is a sign of not very interested in my eyes.

ok, yes, maybe he's interested, but not very interested. not very interested to a point to forget about the stupid three days rule. not very interested to a point to forget about protecting himself but grasp the chance to communicate with me.

Lucyx

satc83 wrote: »

did the typical girl thing and texted him last nite i was tipsy.

have to say that i resent this. its kinda suggesting that we're all idiot airheads who have no control over our actions....and we do !!!

also i'm sure guys have drunk dialled/texted too.

LegacyUser

Lucyx wrote: »

have to say that i resent this. its kinda suggesting that we're all idiot airheads who have no control over our actions....and we do !!!

also i'm sure guys have drunk dialled/texted too.

thats fair enough i shouldnt speak on behalf of all womankind but idiot airheads was a tad harsh