Severe shyness...killing me

The Kid Frankie

Whats up everyone

I'm sick of going red at the drop of a hat for no reason, I think too much about what other people are thinking and I don't know how to deal with all this...theres no one I can talk to about it

I have a lovely girlfriend and loadsa of friends but I go red even when I talk to my best friend and the more I think about it the more I go red...

I saw another thread about the same sort of thing on here...just wondering can anyone give me some advice that will help me get over it because its holding me back from a lot of stuff

I'm slowly coming of the crack cocaine so thats a plus

Any help would be great:o

miss5

I know someone who used to be very like this, My advice would be
to try not to think about it and relax, Once you feel confident within
yourself it should improve.

missus cat

its social phobia disorder, its horrible, know what you mean.

AssaultedPeanut

This thread is very helpful....

http://boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2055649856

profitius

The best way for me to describe it is you have a sort of negative filter. Its a subconscious thing so you might not be consciously aware of it. When in the company of people, deep down you believe you're not good enough and automatically think that they don't like you or find you boring etc.

The subconscious reacts automatically because its obeying your belief system. So that needs to be changed.

You need to redefine who you are. You see yourself as a shy person so naturally thats how you're acting.

Heres a few things you can try doing. Next time you're in the company of people imagine you're somebody else. A confident or even cocky person who everyone loves. Be positive and more confident.

You basically need to focus your attention on what you want and that includes WHO YOU want to be.

So what sort of person would you like to be?

deadpoet

Very good advice there from profitius. I myself am going to recommend this book to you, which you can view and download at the following address: http://www.scribd.com/doc/7481027/The-Power-of-Concentration-

Please read this; as some one who has found themselves in quite a similar situation to yourself I have gained fantastic wisdom and tools to cope from reading this book. You might want to check out the chapters dealing with Self-Mastery in particular, as I think this is exactly what you need insight on.

Were you like this before the crack and were using as a means of escapism? Or is it possible this is a symptom of withdrawl?

I applaud you for deciding to kick the coke anyway; much respect and good luck to you.

moviesrme

I suffered from anxiety a number of years ago. I tried all the logical approaches ie. When we encounter problems in life usually we try to fix them like a broken down car. The above seem to me to be based in this kind of approach.
What worked for me was seeing a councillor for a year and just expressing my feelings. The way I look at it now is I had no access to my feelings and I saturated such that every little thing would seem like life and death. Once I "cleared out the buffer" so to speak the robustness of repsonse ie taking things in my stirde returned. I suspect this is what is going on with you OP.
However I may be wrong. It is just my opinion.