strange problem

LegacyUser

sorry about this guys, but need some help. I'm a 30 something guy who has a strange problem. basically I've never really enjoyed sex as much as I'd like. Had a few bad experiences when I was younger and have never really got over it. The result is that I get anxious when intimate and sometimes fail to get an erection. Have had a few short relationships. I have been to doctors and psychologists and have all assured me its in my mind.
anyway the other thing is because of this I was celibate for a large part of my early 20's now I want to get back to normal and have a proper sex life but everytime I think of it I get depressed. Also this has resulted in compulsive masturbation which is about 3 times a day minimum. This is obviously making things worse and is more than I used to do when I was 15!!.

So basically what I would like to ask, how often do lads want sex??, is it normal to just want it a couple of times a week??. Are lads always ready to jump into the sack???. Lastly I know it's a bit personal but how often do lads masturbate as they get older, I assumed that by now I wouldn't be bothered with it??
This is a genuine post btw.