How to speak proper

Unwilling

OK - here's the thing. I am a professional woman, not in any position of authority. I am good at my job, capable and qualified. I am intelligent. I have opinions - in the past I've been accussed of being aggressive with a bulldozing approach something i've worked very hard on combatting and with a level of success I have to add.

The problem is if there is something bothering me, a work related matter, something that irks or upsets me. If I in a review and I'm trying to big myself up and tell them all the wonderful things about me.
I BECOME A QUIVERING WRECK - it's not that I am not able to say what I want. It's just the minute I being my lip curls I get a shake in my voice and it's ALL I CAN DO NOT TO CRY.
And these would not be cry-worthy moments.

I thought about assertivenss training but I'm not sure that is the key.

Am i just incapable of effectively communicating to a person in authority!?
Althoug I'd like to add sometimes it can be just a collegue!?

ANY SUGGESTIONS WELCOME as I want to NIP THIS IN THE BUTT

Thank you

Wazdakka

Unwilling wrote: »

I am a professional woman, not in any position of authority.

Wooo...

The system works.

\0/

CreepingDeath

Motivational Picture

gamgsam

Taking singing lessons for a year made me able to read fluently out loud. Used to get stick in school for stuttering from teachers, but it was sorted before I even realised!

Maybe it'd help you

Hagar

Start as you mean to go on, "How to speak properly".

The term is "nip it in the bud" not "butt".

This is going to be a long thread.


I just read it all. I can't do this on my own. Light the Spell Czechs beacon.

Kiera

Hagar wrote: »

Start as you mean to go on, "How to speak properly".

The term is "nip it in the bud" not "butt".

This is going to be a long thread.

I'm so glad you're back

EL_Loco

you're an aggressive bulldozer/sensitive type?

you really want help? and post in AH.

I don't believe you.

mfceiling

Unwilling wrote: »

OK - here's the thing. I am a professional woman, not in any position of authority. I am good at my job, capable and qualified. I am intelligent. I have opinions - in the past I've been accussed of being aggressive with a bulldozing approach something i've worked very hard on combatting and with a level of success I have to add.

The problem is if there is something bothering me, a work related matter, something that irks or upsets me. If I in a review and I'm trying to big myself up and tell them all the wonderful things about me.
I BECOME A QUIVERING WRECK - it's not that I am not able to say what I want. It's just the minute I being my lip curls I get a shake in my voice and it's ALL I CAN DO NOT TO CRY.
And these would not be cry-worthy moments.

I thought about assertivenss training but I'm not sure that is the key.

Am i just incapable of effectively communicating to a person in authority!?
Althoug I'd like to add sometimes it can be just a collegue!?

ANY SUGGESTIONS WELCOME as I want to NIP THIS IN THE BUTT

Thank you

After i nip you in the butt i want you to make me a cup of tea....there's a good girl!!

Earthhorse

Unwilling wrote: »

ANY SUGGESTIONS WELCOME as I want to NIP THIS IN THE BUTT

I thought about assertivenss training but I'm not sure that is the key.

You need to be more assertive.

orourkeda

Wheres my dinner?

NothingMan

I thought this was going to be an ironic thread about how people can't speak properly and after the barrage of spelling and grammatical errors in the OP i'm still not sure if it's ironic or not.

Have you tried sleeping your way to the top? I find I don't mind women crying as much once i've slept with them. Tends to happen a lot actually.

AnonoBoy

Alcohol will probably help you.

RoadKillTs

I am good at my job, capable and qualified. I am intelligent.

Ah c'mon now!

keepkeyyellow

I say cry. It's my mother's go-to method when her boss is really down on her

NothingMan

keepkeyyellow wrote: »

I say cry. It's my mother's go-to method when her boss is going down on her

fyp.



...sorry. I'm sure your Mother's a saint.

corkcomp

Unwilling wrote: »

in the past I've been accussed of being aggressive with a bulldozing approach something i've worked very hard on combatting and with a level of success I have to add.

I BECOME A QUIVERING WRECK - it's not that I am not able to say what I want. It's just the minute I being my lip curls I get a shake in my voice and it's ALL I CAN DO NOT TO CRY.
And these would not be cry-worthy moments.

Thank you

Im not getting this TBH ... maybe you need to take a small step back to how you used to be, and find am middle ground?

Flying Abruptly

Try giving this place a go

C.D.

Hi OP, let's work on written communication first and then move onto verbal communication.

Unwilling wrote: »

OK - here's the thing- I am a professional woman, not in any position of authority. I am good at my job, capable and qualified. I am intelligent, I have opinions - in the past I've been accused of being aggressive, with my colleagues referring to me as "El Bulldozer" behind my back. It is something I have worked very hard on combating, with a level of success I must add.

The problem is when there is something bothering me, such as a work related matter or something that irks or upsets me. If I am in a review and I'm trying to big myself up and tell them all the wonderful things about me, I become a quivering wreck - it's not that I am not able to say what I want. It's just the minute I begin my lip curls and I get a shake in my voice and it's all I can do not to cry. These would not be cry-worthy moments.

I thought about assertiveness training but I'm not sure that is the key.

Am I just incapable of effectively communicating to a person in authority!?
Although I'd like to add sometimes it can be just a colleague!?

Any suggestions welcome as I want to nip this in the bud.

Thank you.

My personal recommendation would be to refrain from any and all forms of communication for a while. Sure self-imposed silence is almost fashionable these days.

Sykk

*Gets popcorn* :pac::pac:

bonerm

Unwilling wrote: »

I am a professional woman

Great. PM me your vitals, hourly rates and any special services you might provide.

C.D.

OP, in hindsight, perhaps I was a little harsh.

Unwilling wrote: »

I am intelligent...

I would like to take this chance to refer you to this thread. I am certain you'll be able to nip that thread "in the butt" before it gets out of hand so to speak.

Dunjohn

This thread already has ME crying, I can't imagine what the OP is like right now.

Dravokivich

Look in the mirror and tell yerself..

You talking to me...?

You talking to me punk?

Don't see anybody else around here... so you must be talking to me...

Mohawk and assorted weaponary optional...

Jazzy

pretend your someone else, namely this man:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JjAyazqtQj8

seriously, role playing like that works wonders

sexdwarf

C.D. wrote: »

It is something I have worked very hard on combating, with a level of success I must add.

To be fair, 'combatting' is a more common spelling in 'British-English' while 'combating' is common US spelling. Both correct though...

Zillah

Click.

Bonus points because it ends in lol.

hal9000

OP If you can survive this thread you can survive any interview!
I mean look at all the potential interview questions and advice AH provides:

orourkeda wrote: »

Wheres my dinner?

Earthhorse wrote: »

You need to be more assertive.

AnonoBoy wrote: »

Alcohol will probably help you.

Dravokivich wrote: »

Mohawk and assorted weaponary optional...

Alas, Ive been caught out many a time where the interviewer demanded to know, Where their dinner was?

Big Nasty

Popcorn, Ice Cream and Large Coke!

(sits back in chair)

admiralofthefleet

tbh

Dudess

"I like your attitude - feisty... yet spineless".

neil_hosey

lol at this thread :D:D

ocokev

Unwilling wrote: »

If I in a review and I'm trying to big myself up and tell them all the wonderful things about me.
I BECOME A QUIVERING WRECK -

Try not to big yourself up, stay the same size and be honest with yourself about the wonderful you.

Nevyn

Unwilling if you do wish for real suggestions which you may find helpful I suggest you try posting in the Personal Issues forum.

There at least you won't have to suffer unfunny sexist claptrap.

SugarHigh

http://yeschan.org/extensions/InlineImages/image.php?AttachmentID=45

Ticktactoe

Thaedydal wrote: »

Unwilling if you do wish for real suggestions which you may find helpful I suggest you try posting in the Personal Issues forum.

There at least you won't have to suffer unfunny sexist claptrap.

Im glad you pointed this out as I feel the OP has posted in the wrong forum.... Oh the trauma...
Hilarious commentary tho. If I wasn't at work I would be kicking back on the couch, having popcorn and refreshing the page!

corkcomp

Ticktactoe wrote: »

Im glad you pointed this out as I feel the OP has posted in the wrong forum.... Oh the trauma...
Hilarious commentary tho. If I wasn't at work I would be kicking back on the couch, having popcorn and refreshing the page!

+1

just as well the OP doesnt know any of us, she would probably bulldoze us to the ground, before running off in a flood of tears:pac:

ScumLord

Have you considered cocaine at all? It's great for confidence and just great all round. Once you start using it you'll wonder how you got by without it.

Other than that don't try to big yourself up, employees are resources just tell them what you can do if they don't like it throw your hot coffee at them and walk out.

AssaultedPeanut

How to speak properly



I'm helping

biko

Unwilling, as you can tell this isn't the right place to ask.
Post in Personal Issues instead.