Do i wanna come out

LegacyUser

Hi All.

Im a 22 yr very straight acting male. Always been attracted to guys sexually but also get turned on by straight sex. As of this moment I just deny it to anyone. No one ever has been told. Ive never been with a guy before but like mates flirt jokingly in college etc and act all gay. the typical stuff. I am pretty happy the way I am so is there a need to come out. Well obviously if i wanted to be in a relationship with a guy it would be alot easier if people knew. But the problem here is that I dont think I want a relationship with a guy or girl. Ive had one long term girlfriend but she fell ill and i was like her carer for so long. She told me that she cant handle a relationship at the moment which i understand. I watch both gay and straight porn but tbh always enjoy the gay porn. . So I prob am gay but big deal. If i could end up with that girl as previously mentioned, id feel like a million euros .

For anyone who wants to contribute to this is welcome as long as I dont told to sort my life out.

Annasopra

do you want advice or what do you want?

Reflector

I think that sexuality is a journey and that you are still only starting out. To me you probably are more gay than straight but again sexuality is quite fluid with not many people being exclusively gay or straight. Perhaps it is not the best time for you to be in a serious relationship either. You are young so perhaps just make friends have some fun and allow yourself to grow through the experience.

Ps. Dont rely on porn too much for kicks.

Dwn Wth Vwls

It sounds like you're not over your girlfriend at all. Obviously you need a certain amount of time to move on, but at some point it becomes a crutch. Try and decide on a reasonable amount of time and then force yourself to get back out there and meet new people. You'll probably be better able to sort out your sexuality with some experience.

mccarn22

i just think that you are just bi-curious and open to sex and sexuality.. theres no point in putting a label on it.. the only one that should put a label on it is yourself.. and if you feel that others are judging you as such, just say that you are comfortable with your sexuality.. its neither bi, nor gay! you'l always get stigma like... lads will be lads, but look in relation to england-a stones throw away but yet there years ahead of us in relation to sexual identity... iv met groups of british straight lads abroad and one of them was gay/bi.... the best explanation that one told me is that he is attracted to the person not the gender!! good luck with what ever happens.. maybe you should feed your curiosity and experiment with a guy who is more open that yourself..

marknfurter

Got to agree with Mccarn. Life and sexuality is a very long, sometimes difficult but always eye opening experience. I now consider myself a completely Gay man. I have been in an exclusivley gay relationship with my partner for over 5 years. This is the life that I now know that I want. It was not always that easy. Up until 7 years ago, I was a married man with children! Gay life was something that always made me curious, and, after splitting from my then wife, I was landed an opportunity to try some male male fun lets say. It was life changing for me, and I have been content and happy since.
My point is, as all are saying, do not put pressure on yourself, but do get out there and try things out. It is from these experiences taht you will be able to find your way on the road to sexual and life happiness!! Keep an open mind xo

ding-dong

Well, I'm your age and can relate to what you're saying. Take your time and don't bother thinking about "coming out", just get to know yourself a bit better. I found meeting up with people and talking to them was very helpful. When you keep things bottled up you can lose a lot of perpective on things. I thought I was happy, but wasn't. Thought I liked someone, but didn't. I'm not saying that's the case with you, but that was just my experience - yet surely there's a reason you posted here. There are tonnes of people around who are happy to meet up with someone like yourself for a chat. And talking with people really helped me learn to stop caring what people think and to stop living inside my head. There are loads of people out there just like you - hell, some of your friends may be in the same boat and you wouldn't have a clue. Even though you may hear some homophobic banter here and there, there's a substantial gap between what closted people believe straight people think about homosexuality and what they actually think. The truth is, most straight people don't think about homosexuality much at all. They don't really give a toss. You only live once, so whether you're bi-curious or whatever, don't ignore your instincts and don't corner yourself into a situation you may later regret.