If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)

Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie

Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest

Man nearly dies in motorboating accident!

OutlawPete · 2010-04-07 02:45:54

NO this is NOT about Boobs, you dirty minded feckers :mad: Well, to be fair - it is actually .. :pac: Source

07-04-2010 2:45am

#1

OutlawPete

Closed Accounts Posts: 17,689 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: December 2005

Posts: 17240

NO this is NOT about Boobs, you dirty minded feckers :mad:

Well, to be fair - it is actually .. :pac:

BUSTY Claire Smedley's boyfriend Steven nearly DIED when she suffocated him with her enormous boobs during sex.

The mum-of-three, who has 40LL breasts, panicked when she lifted them up to find her lover Steven had stopped breathing.

Claire, 27, boasts the second biggest bust in Britain* with her boobs weighing over a stone EACH.

Steven usually loved being smothered by them.

"This time, he started flailing around a bit, but I assumed it was because he was so excited, so I kept going," she said.

"A few minutes later I noticed he'd stopped moving." By then, sales assistant Steven, also 27, was still and appeared to not be breathing.

Claire said: "I was panicking and just about to call 999 when thankfully he started to come round. He was really woozy, like he was in a trance. Then he sort of coughed and sat up. I was so relieved."

Startled Steven - who did not want to be photographed - added: "I did think my time had come.

"I tried to slap her on her arm to get her to stop and get off me but I think she misread the signals.

"The next thing I knew she was sitting over me asking if I was all right. I must have blacked out. It was pretty hair-raising."

Lucky Steven survived his ordeal, but the pair's relationship did not and they split three months ago.

Claire, from Blackpool, said: "After that he went off sex."
She is now single and is planning a career in modeling to turn her giant boobs into genuine assets.

She added: "People think they're public property. Even in a supermarket people come up asking if they can touch them.

"But if they can earn me a few pounds maybe some good will come out of them."

40M Donna Jones, 26, of Milton Keynes, has Britain's biggest bust.

Source

12

Comments

#2 07-04-2010 2:50am

DazMarz

Closed Accounts Posts: 8,493 ✭✭✭

Join Date: October 2008

Posts: 8385

What a tit....

0
#3 07-04-2010 2:50am

M5

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,161 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: January 2007

Posts: 9959

Nearly died happy!

0
#4 07-04-2010 2:51am

friendface

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 812 ✭✭✭

Join Date: December 2008

Posts: 741

Video here

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_11KofyyRYo

0
#5 07-04-2010 2:53am

M5

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,161 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: January 2007

Posts: 9959

Attached is a pic of the young lady in question, bloody hell they are big

0
#6 07-04-2010 2:53am

smellslikeshoes

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,354 ✭✭✭

Join Date: November 2005

Posts: 3301

Wouldn't be the worst way to die.

0
Advertisement
#7 07-04-2010 2:54am

M5

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,161 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: January 2007

Posts: 9959

Hmmm, getting the feeling that his just may be a publicity stunt......

EDIT:

She is now single and is planning a career in modeling to turn her giant boobs into genuine assets

0
#8 07-04-2010 2:57am

ToniTuddle

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,964 ✭✭✭

Join Date: October 2009

Posts: 8864

40LL :eek::eek::eek:

How the HELL can she even walk???
Her back must be in agony.

I mean seriously...get a reduction for health reasons!

Wait a minute...why do I have the feeling I've posted something like this before to a thread started by Pete....or somehow related to Pete....

:pac:

0
#9 07-04-2010 3:57am

Overheal

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 86,729 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: September 2006

Posts: 79837

friendface wrote: »

Video here

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_11KofyyRYo

What the hell: I would.

.

0
#10 07-04-2010 4:01am

OutlawPete

Closed Accounts Posts: 17,689 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: December 2005

Posts: 17240

Overheal wrote: »

What the hell: I would.

All sorts of fun to be had with them

0
#11 07-04-2010 4:03am

minidazzler

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,739 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: March 2007

Posts: 14596

Overheal wrote: »

What the hell: I would.

.

Same here, but just the one night TBH.

Anymore than that would be quite sh1t because she has a really annoying voice!

0
Advertisement
#12 07-04-2010 4:03am

m@cc@

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,526 ✭✭✭

Join Date: July 2008

Posts: 4407

40LL?! Thats more like the TIT-anic rather that a motorboat.

0
#13 07-04-2010 4:08am

m@cc@

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,526 ✭✭✭

Join Date: July 2008

Posts: 4407

Overheal wrote: »

What the hell: I would.

.

More than a handful is a waste, imo. Give some of that boobage to good-looking washboard-chested ladies.

0
#14 07-04-2010 4:23am

minidazzler

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,739 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: March 2007

Posts: 14596

m@cc@ wrote: »

More than a handful is a waste, imo. Give some of that boobage to good-looking washboard-chested ladies.

Blasphemy, that will be €25,000 please.

More than a handful isn't a waste, especially for a one time thing, because then you can say something cool like I rode this girl with tits this *pulls arms really far apart* size.

0
#15 07-04-2010 4:28am

Overheal

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 86,729 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: September 2006

Posts: 79837

m@cc@ wrote: »

More than a handful is a waste, imo. Give some of that boobage to good-looking washboard-chested ladies.

You're just not thinking about it right.

0
#16 07-04-2010 4:29am

x PyRo

Moderators Posts: 8,755 ✭✭✭

Join Date: March 2009

Posts: 8635

Those massive things could be where Bin Laden is hiding.

Search Minions, Search!

0
#17 07-04-2010 4:55am

OutlawPete

Closed Accounts Posts: 17,689 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: December 2005

Posts: 17240

Some of the comments under the article are gas:

Bless her! She looks really sweet in that video. Hope she buys something nice for her kids though with the money the paper will have given her, they'll be bloody mortified when they grow up.

0
#18 07-04-2010 5:02am

old_aussie

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,410 ✭✭✭

Join Date: November 2009

Posts: 3308

Claire, 27, boasts the second biggest bust in Britain with her boobs weighing over a stone EACH.

Gee, and I thought being stoned to death was a barbaric way to die:rolleyes:

0
#19 07-04-2010 5:05am

m@cc@

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,526 ✭✭✭

Join Date: July 2008

Posts: 4407

Buford T. Justice wrote:

Gimme the good old days when a pair of boobs were a couple of dumb guys

0
#20 07-04-2010 6:57am

Nulty

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,838 ✭✭✭

Join Date: May 2006

Posts: 7404

M5 wrote: »

Hmmm, getting the feeling that his just may be a publicity stunt......

EDIT:

That was my impression after 10 seconds. Weird that it oozed publicity after 5 lines of the article and the lame description of what happened

0
#21 07-04-2010 7:09am

Snowie

Closed Accounts Posts: 22,048 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: November 2008

Posts: 21684

death bye moter boating.....:pac:

0
Advertisement
#22 07-04-2010 7:44am

bronte

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,331 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: October 2006

Posts: 11279

x PyRo wrote: »

Those massive things could be where Bin Laden is hiding.

Search Minions, Search!

Probably has Shergar in there as well.
Her back will be destroyed if it isn't already.

0
#23 07-04-2010 7:53am

bonerm

Closed Accounts Posts: 8,595 ✭✭✭

Join Date: December 2009

Posts: 8534

boner

0
#24 07-04-2010 8:37am

seamus

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 68,317 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: July 2001

Posts: 67070

I'm quite confused here.

When did it become acceptable to interchange the words, "fat bitch" with "big boobs"?

She has enormous breasts because she's a whale. Almost any woman could claim the same thing if they ate their entire family for breakfast.

0
#25 07-04-2010 8:44am

dr.bollocko

Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 35,945 Mod ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: July 2006

Posts: 33534

seamus wrote: »

I'm quite confused here.

When did it become acceptable to interchange the words, "fat bitch" with "big boobs"?

She has enormous breasts because she's a whale. Almost any woman could claim the same thing if they ate their entire family for breakfast.

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showpost.php?p=60817078&postcount=1

'Listen, you don't have big breasts! You've fat breasts!'

0
#26 07-04-2010 9:40am

orourkeda

Closed Accounts Posts: 17,918 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: December 2004

Posts: 17783

excellent baps

0
#27 07-04-2010 9:49am

kingtut

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,488 ✭✭✭

Join Date: October 2008

Posts: 6243

Old old news by now!

0
#28 07-04-2010 10:07am

bonerm

Closed Accounts Posts: 8,595 ✭✭✭

Join Date: December 2009

Posts: 8534

seamus wrote: »

When did it become acceptable to interchange the words, "fat bitch" with "big boobs"?

When they were massive.

Beside from the photo (haven't seen the video) it appears she has a decent enough flab-to-tits ratio so it's all good.

0
#29 07-04-2010 10:13am

Max Power1

Closed Accounts Posts: 10,272 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: January 2009

Posts: 10041

beeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwbbsss

0
#30 07-04-2010 10:17am

OutlawPete

Closed Accounts Posts: 17,689 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: December 2005

Posts: 17240

seamus wrote: »

I'm quite confused here.

When did it become acceptable to interchange the words, "fat bitch" with "big boobs"?

She has enormous breasts because she's a whale. Almost any woman could claim the same thing if they ate their entire family for breakfast.

I call foul.

No way is she a "whale".

Look at the pic again.

Her stomach is almost flat.

Okay, maybe she's wearing whatever chicks wear to tighten that area, but if she was a whale, no way could she do that.

Mary Harney could be described as a 'whale' (sorry Mary) and her boobs do not appear "big", she's almost flat chested.

No, this woman has a great set of knockers and is far far from a fat bird, let alone a "whale".

0
Advertisement
#31 07-04-2010 10:24am

seamus

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 68,317 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: July 2001

Posts: 67070

Her stomach looks flat in relation to her tits.

She has two chins, just like a blue whale.

0
#32 07-04-2010 10:25am

bonerm

Closed Accounts Posts: 8,595 ✭✭✭

Join Date: December 2009

Posts: 8534

OutlawPete wrote: »

Mary Harney could be described as a 'whale' (sorry Mary) and her boobs do not appear "big", she's almost flat chested.

Plank looks like a cardboard cutout in that pix. Almost fitting I suppose.

0
#33 07-04-2010 10:29am

OutlawPete

Closed Accounts Posts: 17,689 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: December 2005

Posts: 17240

seamus wrote: »

Her stomach looks flat in relation to her tits.

She has two chins, just like a blue whale.

Harsh, very harsh.

Her arms are thin also.

I call your judgment of the ladies into question sir :mad:

This Motorboating Godess should be appreciated and go down in the fapping hall of fame.

0
#34 07-04-2010 10:32am

Kiera

Closed Accounts Posts: 13,130 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: July 2005

Posts: 12749

seamus wrote: »

Her stomach looks flat in relation to her tits.

She has two chins, just like a blue whale.

So if "one" was able to motorboat themselves they be a fat bitch?

0
#35 07-04-2010 10:33am

dr.bollocko

Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 35,945 Mod ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: July 2006

Posts: 33534

Kiera wrote: »

So if "one" was able to motorboat themselves they be a fat bitch?

Maybe if they're motorboating themselves with their own chins...

0
#36 07-04-2010 10:37am

Kiera

Closed Accounts Posts: 13,130 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: July 2005

Posts: 12749

dr.bollocko wrote: »

Maybe if they're motorboating themselves with their own chins...

We're talking about diddys here, bollocko!

0
Advertisement
#37 07-04-2010 10:43am

bonerm

Closed Accounts Posts: 8,595 ✭✭✭

Join Date: December 2009

Posts: 8534

Kiera wrote: »

So if "one" was able to motorboat themselves they be a fat bitch?

So when will "one" be self-motorboating? Any time soon? And will the be pixorgtfo?

0
#38 07-04-2010 10:46am

OutlawPete

Closed Accounts Posts: 17,689 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: December 2005

Posts: 17240

bonerm wrote: »

So when will "one" be self-motorboating? Any time soon? And will the be pixorgtfo?

What are the rules of "self motorboating" anyway?

Is it just bewbage that needs to make contact with the lips or does nippleage contact also need to take place?

0
#39 07-04-2010 10:47am

Kiera

Closed Accounts Posts: 13,130 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: July 2005

Posts: 12749

bonerm wrote: »

So when will "one" be self-motorboating? Any time soon? And will the be pixorgtfo?

"one" likes to keep those kinds of things in here/ the couch/spare room/table.....

0
#40 07-04-2010 5:32pm

bonerm

Closed Accounts Posts: 8,595 ✭✭✭

Join Date: December 2009

Posts: 8534

friendface wrote: »

Video here

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_11KofyyRYo

I would definetly like to stick my face between that pair.

0
#41 07-04-2010 6:04pm

Stinicker

Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 7,102 ✭✭✭

Join Date: March 2010

Posts: 6510

She's no Lolo Ferrari thats for sure!

0
Advertisement
#42 07-04-2010 6:22pm

PK2008

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,219 ✭✭✭

Join Date: November 2008

Posts: 2168

M5 wrote: »

Attached is a pic of the young lady in question, bloody hell they are big

Wow!! Massive ears aswell

0
#43 07-04-2010 7:21pm

Hank_Jones

Closed Accounts Posts: 5,783 ✭✭✭

Join Date: February 2009

Posts: 5548

This comes to mind:

0
#44 07-04-2010 7:23pm

bonerm

Closed Accounts Posts: 8,595 ✭✭✭

Join Date: December 2009

Posts: 8534

Don't ruin this "massive jugs" thread with mention of Vince Vaughan and/or the other fella.

0
#45 07-04-2010 7:36pm

Hank_Jones

Closed Accounts Posts: 5,783 ✭✭✭

Join Date: February 2009

Posts: 5548

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=itBo0lXqAbc

I'll do what I like.

To a certain extent anyway.

0