Help! ex trying to savatage me

hickory99

Hi guys,

complicated situation. I am living on Job Seekers Allowance at the moment, out of work cos my business went bust (my ex fleeced me in seperation). So I'm on JSA and have applied for rent allowance since I have my 3 children stay with me half the time.
Problem is my ex is still dead set on ruining me. Its bad enough being out of work for the first time in 20 years but now i#ve been told that she has reported me to the social saying that my girlfriend is living here.
Thats not the case, she stays a couple of nights a week cos she works up this way but we were told a long time ago that she can stay up to 3 nights per week without it affecting my benefits. However the social welfare inspector that i have applied for rent allowance with has told me she cant stay at all if i'm on rent allowance and that she wants details of her income. I have two problems here :
1.) surely as an adult i can have someone stay over, and if my mother came to stay for the night as she does to see her grandchildren, will they be looking for her income?
2.) my girlfriends income is her business and i know she won't be handing that over to them, she is very private.

She only works part time and her bills are so high that she can't afford to move in with him as she can't afford to contribute to the rent. unfortunately there is one tie between her and my address and that is her job. She applied for her current job using this address as they wanted someone local, but all her bills and details are still in her own family home.

What can I do here, my ex is trying to make everything as hard as possible on me and the truth is if i dont get help with the rent soon I'll be out on the street and unable to take my kids as i'll have no where to bring them.
any help or advice welcome.......

jimoc

There is a huge difference between your mother staying over for one night and your girlfriend staying over for half the working week.

Regardless of what your ex-wife is attempting to do, if the inspector has told you that you wont get rent allowance with your girlfriend staying there, then you need to get that situation sorted out before you do anything else.
if that means that your girlfriend needs to change her address back to her own place, then so be it.

Once you have been assessed for rent allowance, then you can go about enquiring as to whether its okay or not for her to say, but do it in writing, not just on the strength of a phone call.

Harsh reality is, your life is currently in the inspectors hands, so you really don't want to annoy him, or give the impression that you are trying to game the system.

hickory99

She doesnt stay half the week, we were told she can stay up to 3 nights a week, most weeks its only a night or two but yeah maybe changing the address is the way to go hopefully it won't affect her job though

eth0_

OP, as far as I understand it, the inspector can't do anything on hearsay and they have to have proof that your girlfriend is living there - either by putting your address under surveillance (although I think that is very rare in Ireland), or by calling to your house unannounced and finding proof that your gf is living there (lots of her possessions in the house etc).

Of course you can have your girlfriend stay over but there is a limit before it is deemed that she is "living with you". I'm not 100% but I think it's 2 or 3 nights in a week.

Pete4779

hickory99 wrote: »

Hi guys,



1.) surely as an adult i can have someone stay over, and if my mother came to stay for the night as she does to see her grandchildren, will they be looking for her income?
2.) my girlfriends income is her business and i know she won't be handing that over to them, she is very private.

Your girlfriend has a primary residence elsewhere. Unless she is claiming some benefits, they have no entitelment to her financial details.

As far as I can see, you live alone and have your children there for 3 days per week. That is the truth of the matter, and you should deny any accusations that your girlfriend is there 1, 2 or 7 days per week. If your girlfriend has another primary address, that is her address, and your ex- can shove it.

Get it on paper, and signed by the appropriate person, that your girlfriend can spend 3 nights per week at your place. What days she does this specifically is your business, not your ex's.

hickory99

Thanks pete
Thats nice to hear, my ex seems to have made ruining my life her number one prority and i'm at the end of my tedder now.
Yes we can prove that she has a primary residence elsewhere like i said the only tie to my address is her job but its only part time and she needed a local address to get it but now she is in it a while she is going to switch it to her own home and hopefully she doesnt lose her job over all this,
thanks i wish break ups could be less bitter and twisted

Balagan

The issue of being allowed to cohabit 2 or 3 nights is not relevant in respect of rent supplement. What the inspector said is based on the regulations as they stand. And according to them, if your partner is cohabiting with you for all or part of the time, her income must be declared for your rent supplement application. If she were working full time, you wouldn't get the supplement, but since she is part time they will consider the application if she is working less than 30 hours per week.

You will not qualify for Rent Supplement if you are in full-time employment. That is, employment for 30 hours per week or more. (In the case of couples, if one of a couple is in full time employment both are excluded from claiming Rent Supplement).

http://www.citizensinformation.ie/categories/social-welfare/social-welfare-payments/supplementary-welfare-schemes/rent_supplement