Confused and thinking about ending it

LegacyUser

My girlfriend and I have been on and off for around 3 years, first time around I broke up with her(due to us simply not seeing enough of each other) second time around she broke up with me.Now we are back together again but havent seen each other in 2 weeks.

I really like this girl and thought about her all the time when we were not together, but I havent seen her lately because she is so busy. Part of me is saying ok shes busy with work and college(doing a part time masters)...fair enough but another part of me is saying that if she wanted to see me she would make time. Also I am asking myself do I want to be with a girl who can't seem to make time for me but I suffer a bit from low self esteem and never seem to be able to stick up for myself when it comes to women because I am afraid it will lead to me being alone again.

Even this little rant has not really cleared my mind and I would really appreciate it if anyone could weigh in with an opinion. Thanks.

P.S. I have been with other women while we had broken up but I never felt the same about any of them as I do about her.

LegacyUser

O/P here, anyone care to weigh in with an opinion? Would really appreciate it.

unattendedbag

Whats the communication like between you's?
Have you's even spoke in 2 weeks or just not seen each other?
Do you ever talk to her on the phone? (quick phone call before she's going to bed). It should be easy to determine whether she is ignoring you or if you have been making sufficient effort to see her too.

If i hadnt spoke to mt girlfriend in 2 weeks id be very worried. Ring her, txt her, call over unexpectedly, and give her support if she's busy. make her dinner or something when she's studying.

LegacyUser

I have been talking to her most days but she seems to be spending all her spare time with friends and seems to be making little effort to see me. I have offered to do things for her but the last few weeks she has said shes been very busy. Maybe genuienely she has been busy but I am getting a bit fed up to be honest and maybe its time to give an ultimatum, either put more effort into us or it's over for good this time.

yermandan

Hi OP,

The bottom line is that, regardless of whether or not she is that into the relationship, it is simply not meeting your needs.

So you have 2 options;

1) Sit her down, explain to her exactly how you feel and see what her response is and take it from there, or

2) Break-up, because deep down, from past experience, you know that this is not the relationship for you.

Best of luck

EDIT : Having re-read over your posts OP, my guess is that she is just not that into the relationship and has other priorities at the moment. Its a bitter pill to swallow because of how strongly you feel for her but my advice would be to cut your losses, you have both spent 3 years on this relationship and it still is not meeting your needs (or hers, thats why she is spending all of her free time with others/doing other things).

CBFi

Hi OP,

I would agree with previous posters- I understand she's really busy with college on top of work- it's that time of year for projects etc, but if she can make the time to see friends, then she can make the time to see you.

I'm doing projects and so is my BF and we've just been studying together cos we wouldnt go without seeing each other.

While I would disagree with just showing up and offering to make her dinner (I'd hate that!) maybe text her and ask her if you can come over and make her dinner while she studies and after you've eaten you'll leave her to it?

I think she sounds like she's not that into it either but you wont know till you're honest about how you are feeling with her.

Good luck!