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A poem up for critique :D

  • 31-03-2010 7:46pm
    #1
    DarkBlue_18
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 26 ✭


    Please feel free to offer compliments, criticism (constructive or destructive(It is all constructive to me :D)) and any other comments you wish to make. Thanking y'all in advance Darkblue_18!!


    My Anonymous

    Oh I have had such daring dreams
    Offered images and opened seams -
    To natures beauty I have thee compared
    A warm summer palette
    My vision impaired.
    But I am forced to gaze at you from afar
    A distance between us
    A moment ajar
    So valiant I wish to be
    So audacious I dare to dream
    And I begin to walk away; I turn my back
    But yet you stay.
    But still a fear in me resides
    And still I stand here, alone outside.
    For I have gone and gone and left again
    And reverted to tell this story through a pen
    A story of secrecy is this I hold
    Because when I dream, regrets unfold.


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