Fed up being bulimic

LegacyUser

All i want to do is to be slim and yet the more i try the worse and more overweight i get.
iv been bulimic for years, and any help thats out there is for teenagers.
There is none for older women.
Its not that i havent looked for help its just that i cant find it.
I sometimes wish i was anorexic at least then i would be thin, or that
there was a pill to stop you eating. Iv tried appetite supressents but as
i dont have a problem with appetite they are no good.
Im fat, deppressed and realy very miserable with various other illnesses.

MysticalSoul

Sorry to hear you are having a tough time, however, as I am sure you are aware, the food, or what size you want to be are not the problem. Eating disorders are usually a mask of something else, even though it very often may not feel like that. As someone who has fully recovered, and sought treatment as an adult, I can say there is help out there. Not sure where you are based, but the Eating Disorders Ireland have therapists listed on their website throughout the country.

http://www.eatingdisorders.ie/therapists.htm

Also, the Lois Bridges centre do an outpatient programme as well as inpatient, they may be help you or offer you advice. http://www.eatingdisordersdublin.ie/index.html

Have you contacted bodywhys www.bodywhys.ie.

Best of luck with finding help.

xzanti

Have you tried the Marino Therapy Centre, a friend of mine went there and she said it really helped her, they concentrate more on understanding the emotional issues as opposed to just the food and it's quite effective apparently.. www.marinotherapycentre.com

Good luck

MysticalSoul

xzanti wrote: »

Have you tried the Marino Therapy Centre, a friend of mine went there and she said it really helped her, they concentrate more on understanding the emotional issues as opposed to just the food and it's quite effective apparently.. www.marinotherapycentre.com

Good luck

None of the therapists working there these days are registered with the IACP nor have they appropriate training with any counselling institute - those that were have long left, so I personally would not touch them. It was through Marino that I recovered, however the therapist I went to was qualified, but is no longer working there.

xzanti

MysticalSoul wrote: »

None of the therapists working there these days are registered with the IACP nor have they appropriate training with any counselling institute - those that were have long left, so I personally would not touch them. It was through Marino that I recovered, however the therapist I went to was qualified, but is no longer working there.

Didn't know that now, sounds like they've gone to pot, not unlike most things in this country, that's a real shame..

Emme

bigmomashouse wrote: »

All i want to do is to be slim and yet the more i try the worse and more overweight i get.
iv been bulimic for years, and any help thats out there is for teenagers.
There is none for older women.
Its not that i havent looked for help its just that i cant find it.
I sometimes wish i was anorexic at least then i would be thin, or that
there was a pill to stop you eating. Iv tried appetite supressents but as
i dont have a problem with appetite they are no good.
Im fat, deppressed and realy very miserable with various other illnesses.

How old are you? Bodywhys.ie will help anyone, not just teenagers. Your other illnesses could well be a result of your bulimia. If possible try not to have trigger foods in the house and set yourself a goal to get fit - do something to get yourself out of the house away from temptation. Depending on how fit you are you could aim to walk a mile or run a 10K. As long as you're bulimic your body won't be your friend and the other illnesses are unlikely to go away. Have you spoken to your GP about it?

LegacyUser

Thanks for the replys. Unfortunatly bodywhys only realy cater for young adults and teenagers, im in my 30s. Thanks for the advice re marino, i have had a look at the other site. I actualy went to my gp today as i just cant take it anymore.
Im already attending a coucelor but she does not specialise in ed. She helping my sort through all the other crap going on in my life.
My gp is refering me to a specialist ed clinic.
But seriously im obsessed about trying to be thin and the more i try the fatter i get
i sometimes ish i was anorexic at least the i wouldnt be a fat blob with no self asteme.
This all started as a teenager wanting to be thin like all my friends.
I was always the ugly fat unpopular invisable one. I always remember when a group of us used to play kiss chasing and i was always the one left out that nobody chased.
AH ok, now im just feeling sorry for myself, ( pull urself together girl)!!

LegacyUser

bigmomashouse wrote: »

Thanks for the replys. Unfortunatly bodywhys only realy cater for young adults and teenagers, im in my 30s. Thanks for the advice re marino, i have had a look at the other site. I actualy went to my gp today as i just cant take it anymore.
Im already attending a coucelor but she does not specialise in ed. She helping my sort through all the other crap going on in my life.
My gp is refering me to a specialist ed clinic.
But seriously im obsessed about trying to be thin and the more i try the fatter i get
i sometimes ish i was anorexic at least the i wouldnt be a fat blob with no self asteme.
This all started as a teenager wanting to be thin like all my friends.
I was always the ugly fat unpopular invisable one. I always remember when a group of us used to play kiss chasing and i was always the one left out that nobody chased.
AH ok, now im just feeling sorry for myself, ( pull urself together girl)!!

I'm going unreg for this but I was exactly like you in my teens. The fat one nobody wanted. I "discovered" bulimia at 14, lost two stone but it made no difference. I was still a nerd. Later I had to have loads of dental treatment thanks to being bulimic in my teens. It came back on and off and I could never say I'm fully recovered even though I'm in my late 30s. If I'm lucky I'll have an episode every 6 months. It came back during an abusive relationship and after a sexual assault on a date. How did I get over it? The dental bills brought me to my senses. I also got into sport and found that being bulimic seriously impaired my performance. Sport has the benefit of keeping me in shape and keeping me aware of how I treat my body. If I treat my body badly it won't do what I want it to do.

Forget the past, you can only change the present and to a limited extent, the future. I can't believe that bodywhys only caters for younger women. Bulimia is common in older women as well, women in their 30s and 40s trying to stay thin because of media pressure. Eating disorders affect all age groups.

Good luck. If you want to be healthy you'll find a way.

xzanti

bigmomashouse wrote: »

AH ok, now im just feeling sorry for myself, ( pull urself together girl)!!

It's allowed *hugs*

LegacyUser

Thanks guys, iv tried my best today. I spent the whole hour of my couceling this morning
crying, im just dealing with so so so much in my life past and present. I hate my life i hate who i am, what i look like just everything realy. And i have to say and i have told my coucelor this that if it wasnt for the 4 kids i would have killed myself by now. Its only the thought that nobody could love or take care of them the way i can. But i realy feel this is the time to sort out my eating as its realy taking over my life and in the past i always thought i was in control and could stop any time but now i know i cant as its contoling me.
So iv tried today but the only way i know how is to not eat at all.
Its like when your tring to give up drink or cigeretts you stay away as you know if you have one that it.
Thanks again.

MysticalSoul

It's good that you are seeing a counsellor - as even though you are still struggling, it shows that you do want to change. I agree with what you say, that it is like an addiction, but full recovery is possible. I used to go to the Bodywhys meetings and found that when I was attending there were other adults there too (I sought help for my eating disorder in my 20's).

LegacyUser

Hiya thanks for the reply.
I realy should have faced up to this a long long time ago cause there is way more support.
And the fact that money is tight and i cant go private doesnt help.
I realy tried today then for some stupid reason i went into mcdonalds
( with the kids was out of my hands) and i promised myself id just get a drink, this was at 7pm and i was starving hadnt eaten all day. And i wont go into detail but you can get what happened.
I would love to go to a group, mybe like bodywhts group but for older people i would realy feel out of place otherwise.

Anyway thanks for all the replys i realy appreciate it, it realy done me good to finaly get it off my chest apart for my coucilor.

LegacyUser

Hi thanks for the positive feedback regarding marino.
i have some questions if you dont mind.
Is it weekly group sessions?
Do they do one to one?
How much does it cost?
thanks.

melissavm

OP I understand where you are coming from. I know its hard and when you are eating disordered it comes before pretty much anything else but speaking from experience (a brief bout) I have to make the point that bulimia is completely pointless and plummets your health.
You cannot lose weight through binging and purging, in fact all it does is destroy your gag reflex and your teeth. Not to mention your hair thins and your skin is more prone to acne. I know what i'm saying is probably not helping but maybe seeing a doctor can. There are ways to lose weight without destroying your body.
Eating disorders affect not only you but the people around you who love you. I'm aware you've probably heard this ten million times before but recovering might be the best thing you'll ever do.