Advice please?

LegacyUser

Just looking for a bit of advice here and it’s a long story so bear with me  I’m 24 now and my folks trial separated when I was 15, then they got back together a few months later (I think more for my sake really). So when I went to college they separated for good, and frankly I was happy, it put an end to all the tension and fights in the house.

While my Dad was living at home and as I was under 18 I couldn’t have an SSIA account in my name so I put money into his one (there’s records from my credit union account to his account), and he and my sister put money into hers. The accounts matured back whenever it was a couple of years back now I reckon, and I didn’t even think to ask for my money off him as I assumed he’d just give it to me. However this hasn’t been the case.

My relationship has been strained with him since the separation (he’s a difficult man to get along with and my sister and I have been alienated by his side of the family) and it’s very hard to get in contact with him and the last time I spoke to him was after my birthday last year. I asked him for my money then and he said he didn’t have it, but he’d give it to me in October when he gets paid from a job he was doing. So I haven’t heard an iota from him since then, nothing for Christmas (but then again I didn’t contact him either).

I hate the fact that I have to keep asking for this money, and I know when I owe money I have to pay it back ASAP but clearly other people don’t feel like this. So in short, does anyone have any advice for me?

The_Conductor

sunflower27 wrote: »

Hey OP

How much money are we talking about here?

Depending on the type of SSIA account- it could be between 8 and 20k......

LegacyUser

It's 10k sunflower. I've tried asking him for it, to no avail. So I've decided to send him a letter (registered post so I'll know if he's gotten it or not) and hopefully it'll be sorted soon.

tenchi-fan

hi brokestudent..

Your dad sounds like an as$hole.

My dad did the ssia for me. Never gave me a cent in college, but everyone knew he was generous because he made a public display of the ssia which "was for a deposit on a house."

When it matured it's all he talked to me about.. house prices were exploding. 3 years of him blaming me for being a waster and not having a good enough job, and that I "should have a house by now". Then he became an expert on the stock market and hassled me to invest in Irish shares. I ignored him for a few years but in the end I said "yea, whatever" - it was win win. If it went up, I'd scoop the gain and hand him the rest back and he'd be happy. If it lost I'd be delighted because I'd be rid of it and it was his fault. I should have handed it back, I realise that now. As it happened it lost half (20k down to 10k)

He waited til the day before I was starting a new job. he fabricated an argument (i missed his call and he started accusing me of ignoring it.) he called me every name under the sun, threw every insult at me, ridiculed me about everything that didn't go my way since i left college, told me I was a disappointment.. and then finally, threw the ssia into it. 8 years of annoyance for a lousy €10k hardly seems worth it.

Have some pride in yourself and tell the miserable fool to keep it. He's already treating you bad so why let him have something over you? Get a student loan instead.

And when you have kids, just remember this ... €100 a month saved over 18 years can yield about €35000 in a deposit account. Put it in trust for your kids!

unreggd

tenchi-fan wrote: »

Have some pride in yourself and tell the miserable fool to keep it. He's already treating you bad so why let him have something over you? Get a student loan instead

It's the OP's money, its not an SSIA his Dad set up that was meant to be fore him, but he changed his mind

OP, if you have the records, and he keeps refusing, or puttin it off, maybe get some free legal aid abt the situation

IMO, theft from your kids is sick. My Mam did the same to me and I've never understood how she could do it

tenchi-fan

His dad set up the ssia in his own name.
it seems he lodged money to his son's account, which was removed monthly to pay the ssia.
nah - some things aren't about the money. the op chose "brokestudent" as his name, i just said if he's broke maybe he should get a loan and keep his dad out of it.

LegacyUser

Thanks for the replies you guys.
Just to clear up on a couple of things, I'm a girl, and it's my money that went into his account. Essentially the money was in an SSIA in his name, but I was the one feeding cash into it.
About the legal aid, would I not be laughed at for not being able to sort out a family matter by myself?

LegacyUser

You would have a problem going the legal route here as your intent was technically illegal in the first instance. There were strict rules about SSIA acoounts and the beneficial ownership of the money in same.

Victor

brokestudent wrote: »

About the legal aid, would I not be laughed at for not being able to sort out a family matter by myself?

No, you will not be laughed at. This is not the Marx Brothers. Victims aren't laughed at.

www.flac.ie or you local solicitor. Your student's union may have one to recommend.

ddddddddddddddd wrote: »

You would have a problem going the legal route here as your intent was technically illegal in the first instance.

I doubt this will be held against someone who was under 18, although the tax benefit may be forfeited.

LegacyUser

Victor wrote: »

No, you will not be laughed at. This is not the Marx Brothers. Victims aren't laughed at.

www.flac.ie or you local solicitor. Your student's union may have one to recommend.I doubt this will be held against someone who was under 18, although the tax benefit may be forfeited.

What tax benefit? You mean the government top-up contribution?

Victor

dddddddddd wrote: »

What tax benefit? You mean the government top-up contribution?

It was legally phrased a an income tax rebate (even if you weren't earning enough to pay income tax).