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etiquette when sick & cant (perhaps)attend wedding

  • 25-03-2010 5:12pm
    #1
    squiggly
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2 ✭


    what do you do?
    text? fax? i'm feeling poorly, come on in the last 2 hours, its my cousin, but my mother had it earlier in week, well if its the same thing, she was ''up and down'' (if you know what i mean) for 3 days!
    hopefully my immune system will hold up better and all will be good tomorrow, but what if its not? what do i do... thanks


Comments

  • #2
    whatdoicare
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,398 ✭✭✭whatdoicare


    Ring them straight away and let them decide themselves what to do. From my experience though anyone sick in my wedding party (one heavily preggers cousin having a terrible time of it and one uncle recovering from a hip operation) has rang me, opted out of the meal and said if they were up to it, they would attend the ceremony and afters instead.
    Sounds fair enough to me. Ring them and explain yr situation, it's miles better than not turning up as they get charged for yr meal even if u don't eat it.


  • #3
    squiggly
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2 ✭squiggly


    Good plan, thanks for the advice.


  • #4
    iguana
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,917 ✭✭✭✭iguana


    whatdoicare wrote: »
    Ring them and explain yr situation, it's miles better than not turning up as they get charged for yr meal even if u don't eat it.

    I'd imagine that as the wedding is tomorrow they won't be able to cancel the meal and not be charged for it at this point.

    OP, just let them know you are unwell and will do your best to make it. But you might not get to speak to your cousin as they could be up to their eyes right now or having a family meal.


  • #5
    whatdoicare
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,398 ✭✭✭whatdoicare


    iguana wrote: »
    I'd imagine that as the wedding is tomorrow they won't be able to cancel the meal and not be charged for it at this point.

    OP, just let them know you are unwell and will do your best to make it. But you might not get to speak to your cousin as they could be up to their eyes right now or having a family meal.

    I'm sure they can arrange someone to take the ops place on short notice- I know I would.


  • #6
    iguana
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,917 ✭✭✭✭iguana


    whatdoicare wrote: »
    I'm sure they can arrange someone to take the ops place on short notice- I know I would.

    Good point, I didn't think of that.


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  • #7
    How Strange
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,339 ✭✭✭How Strange


    OP it happens and you have to allow for a certain % of no show at the last minute. I think about 5 people didn't make it to ours.

    I wouldn't worry too much. I doubt the bride and groom will be annoyed at you for being sick and costing them money on a dinner that wasn't eaten.

    To be honest, I'd just wait and see how you feel on the morning. You may feel fine so you don't want to cancel your place too soon


  • #8
    Clareman
    Moderators, Sports Moderators, Regional Midwest Moderators Posts: 24,039 Mod ✭✭✭✭Clareman


    It happens, nothing can be done about it, a friend of mine did his back in the church so couldn't attend the evening part. I don't think I'd worry about offering to find someone else to replace you, I don't think too many people would be impressed being ask to attend as a sub. I think I had 8 people not turn up to the meal.

    I would regard the etiquette that you need to give the same present as you would have given if you had attended, but that's just my opinion


  • #9
    seamus
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 68,190 ✭✭✭✭seamus


    whatdoicare wrote: »
    I'm sure they can arrange someone to take the ops place on short notice- I know I would.
    Rather than leave that to the bride and groom, if you can think of anyone who was invited, but turned it down and would now like to go, you could tell them to take your place.

    In our case, one cousin turned down the invite because she was flat broke, but on the day her Dad was sick, so she went in his place.

    Obviously don't invite anyone who wasn't invited! :D If you have no-one to take your place, then yep, let them know because they're not going to get their money back for your meal 2 days beforehand.


  • #10
    spartan1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 102 ✭✭spartan1


    In the nicest possible way I dont think they should be to bothered,
    Shape up, ring up, speak up, and get well soon.
    Seriously, hi cuz just wanted to ring u quickly to say im not feeling the best so Im not sure how ill be there tomorrow, In case I dont make it I hope you have the best day, but if I do ill see you there, love you

    why could you just not do that, surely you can get their mobile somewhere, thats what id do anyway, no in fact, id just not go and ring them the day after but thats just me, my family would do the rest.

    and forget about your place, they'll reprint the table place in 2 seconds flat


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