Threesomes and Swinging in general..

*Trillian*

So been thinking about this A LOT and really wanna get some other people into our bed with us.

Anyone any idea how to broach the subject with people or go about it?

All the swinging sites are pay sites so I don't really wanna do that. Ideally would like to get an interested bisexual girl involved first or another couple.

I was with a girl for a few years before being with my current partner so would love a bit of girl on girl action.

<snip>

Would also love to hear others experiences! This would be our first time doing it but we are both pretty open people and not jealous at all..

blahblah06

By the sounds of it your a girl. Can't see him not wanting to do it lol.

Lux23

Why don't you want to pay for the sites? Surely that's the only way you will find someone.

Miss Fluff

There have been quite a lot of threads on here and Adult Friendfinder seems to be the site that works for people. Why you are unwilling to pay to join a site is beyond me, randomly meeting a bisexual girl who wants a 3sum will not be as easy as it sounds.

krudler

yeah just join adultfriendfinder, that way you cut out all the bs of finding people in bars who wont want to go through with it, its like 60 quid for a few months or something, be worth it if you find what you're looking for?

Peggypeg

hey OP,

I've seen stuff advertised on gumtree? Be careful who you're meeting up with though!!! Just coz someone says they're female on the internet doesn't mean they are. Be careful!

iguana

*Trillian* wrote: »

So been thinking about this A LOT and really wanna get some other people into our bed with us.

Have you been thinking about it a lot or have you and your partner been thinking (and talking) about it a lot, because there is a huge difference. Also be very careful to make sure that this is something you both want fairly equally. If you are pushing him into it, it could be a disaster for your relationship. Contrary to popular belief not all men are gagging to see their partner get it on with another woman.

LegacyUser

Are you bisexual yourself OP? Does your partner know? How long are you together.Do it in light talk joking to see how he reacts(Then the door is open) Or tell him you are interested in threesome.
I do agree with Iguana if not thought through some people are not mature or strong enough for what comes after.
Never would be into it myself,i am sure my OH would but he can sing for that ever happening lol

Shazam69

Hey there, I have see plenty of sites which are free and I'm on them myself. Try smooch and plentyoffish is another. Had lots of joy on both of those sites :D Don't go near Gumtree, its crap and its all fake as once you email anyone all you get is junk mail back :mad:

*Trillian*

Thanks for all the replies. I would pay for a site if I knew a bit more about it and whether it would be worth it but I haven't really broached this subject with anyone before so haven't exactly had any feedback So adultfriendfinder seems to have the majority vote..?

I am on plentyoffish but what should I be? Girl seeking girl? Surely you wont get much luck with that as surely they are looking for other girls and not a one night stand with me and my guy..? Smooch? Will look into it!

I have had a threesome before and really enjoyed it but it was just something that happened, not preplanned . Oh and yes I am bisexual. I was in a relationship with a woman before him. He has watched his ex girlfriend be with another woman and was into it but didn't join in though he would like to.

It's something we've spoken about a lot and are both comfortable with the idea and both very honest and open with each other and have laid out our own thoughts, concerns, fantasies and boundaries with each other and I am 100% neither of us is just going along with it for the other person..

LegacyUser

Our advice would be stay away from adult friend finder as we found it useless, full of fakes and very expensive. sdc on the other hand is where you will find many more real couples and the fakes dont last long there.

gariceimo

Prostitute?

That_Guy

A mate of mine had a threesome and even though it might sound cool, he said it was one of the worst things to have happened.

His relationship ended due to jealousy. They did the deed. Two girls and himself.

It was the aftermath that caused them to split. He'd send her a text asking how she was and his girlfriend would go ballistic because she thought he was paying more attention to her.

Just really petty jealousy like that. I'm not saying that'll happen here OP but just thought you should be aware.

Good luck anyway.

killerking

Hi OP,

I would not recommend a couple having a threesome because jealousy will more than likely tear the relationship apart. I had a threesome with two American girls last St. Patrick's Day.
It was wasn't planned or anything - the two women were best friends since they were playing with dolls, they had experimented with kissing before when they were younger, they had often ended up having the same bf and one guy had cheated on them both with each other at the same time without their knowing so in truth it wasn't much of a stretch to have a threesome although they hadn't done it before. They were also in a foreign country thousands of miles from their friends, were looking for fun and were caught up in the celebrations so they open minded.
If you don't want a threesome to be a disaster it can't be rushed and all 3 people should be equal partners rather than watching two people have sex and then take their turn while the third person watches.
Threesome's are cool but only if it is casual sex and nothing more.
If you want to have threesome you have to just abandon neediness and jealousy and not many people can do that so it's not for everybody.
It's nice to have a fantasy but you have to know what you are getting into.

cpeire

Hey OP we have been using all the sites for while. SDC is good but dosen't really get new members often and has an older age profile. AFF is popular but expensive to keep going. Swing4Ireland is very good, we have a free profile because we joined at the start and not sure what it costs. With all the sites you will have to work hard to meet younger couples, but we have met some great couples off the sites.

To broach it with your other have you can introduce it as a fantasy when ye are in bed together and see if he goes for it. As others have said most guys will be more than up for it.

As other posters have said finding people with using the sites is tricky enough, finding without you would have to be very lucky.

As for runing a relationship it very much depends on the couple and their motiviation for swinging. We are together 10 years have a very strong relationship and been swinging for 7 years.

We don't do it very often and its not the end all and be all its just something we do every now again for some extra fun, we have a great sex life together still.

If ye get into it it will be worth going to one of the clubs in the UK. We go to the F Club in London, its a younger crowed and cuts out endless hours online as you get to meet like minded people face to face in a social setting.

Zen65

cpeire wrote: »

As others have said most guys will be more than up for it.

I don't agree..... I'd be horrified at the thought of it. I think Op should tread carefully here because many guys would just be totally turned off by this.


Be at peace,

Z

S23

I think the 'most guys would love it' is a total myth.

You could say most/a lot of single guys would love the idea of it because that seems more plausible. Any unattached guy with a healthy sexual appetite would probably like the idea of having sex with one attractive woman so stretching it to two attractive women might seem plausible.

However, I think to say 'most guys in a long term committed relationship would love it' is really stretching it. I just don't think its true at all. It's a complete fallacy IMO

Zaph

There was no real need to drag up this thread so I'm closing it.