love or infatuation

jimmity5

maybe this should be in the relationship forum but here goes anyway. first time poster here too. i think i have fallen in love with someone but people i tell think it might just be infatuation. whats the difference? is infatuation an unhealthy thing? how do you know its love. a huge detail here is that she doesnt feel the same about me so can it truely be love if she isnt romantically interested in me?
i really am not sure how i feel anymore, i thought it was love but maybe not

gonnaplayrugby

i think love can only exist if ur close with the person, like proper close. infatuation is when u love the girl who smiles at u walkin down the hallway or somethin.

Chewbacca.

Or when she smiles when the judge imposes a restraining order on you for stalking her, and you think shes smiling at you jimmy

jimmity5

Chewbacca. wrote: »

Or when she smiles when the judge imposes a restraining order on you for stalking her, and you think shes smiling at you jimmy

thanks chewbacca, very helpful. god forbid im actually upset over this and am looking for an actual answer to make this feel a little easier cause at the moment it feels like someone ahas stuck a knife in my stomach and everytime i think about her, and know i have to try to go back to being friends with her, someone twists it that little bit more.

liah

Infatuation is the "honeymoon" stage or the "crush" stage of a relationship.

It's the beginning where everything is amazing about the person and you tend to overlook any other faults because you can't stop thinking about all the things that are so cool or attractive about them. This is the stage where you don't quite know them as a person yet, you're trying really hard to impress them, and you're still learning.

Generally defined by not being able to stop thinking about them, falling all over yourself when they ask you to do something, constantly talking about them to all your friends, getting butterflies when you hear from them, "text wars," etc.

Love is quite different, at least in my opinion.

Love is seeing your partner as your best friend. It's being there for them when the chips are down, wiping the snot off their faces when they're sick in bed, knowing the other person inside and out, and ultimately, completely trusting them and being able to be 100% yourself around them without having to worry about what they think.

Generally defined by still holding onto your own life and knowing that there's that person for you to come home to. Not everything is about them and they don't expect it to be, they understand that. They understand most things about you and accept all your faults and imperfections and you theirs. You're not trying to be anything you're not to impress them, and you don't have to be, because they love you anyway.

jimmity5

Thanks liah that's a really nice view on things. I suppose the infatuation that you describe how I feel about this person and the love you descibe is how i want to be with this person, do you think infatuation is an unhealthy thing in my case? Iv known her for 3 years now and we are great friends(hopefully still will be after this situation) but it's not a case of it being some random girl I barely know ya know

6th

Chewbacca. banned for 1 week for unhelpful posting.

jimmity5, in future please use the report post function.


<-- small triangular warning sign to the left is for reporting posts.