The Greatest Risk

Lands Edge

Okay, this post could be really long, but I'm going try to be brief which will definitely dilute contextual elements.

I've been working with this girl for about 4 months. Over these four months the vibe has been up and down. Right off the bat there was hard eye contact, joking, and flirting. Unfortunately, when I asked her out the first time, there was another man in the frame that had just snatched her up. Soon though, he was out of the frame after a pretty messy break up. I acted fast and asked her out again. I got the old "I don't date people I work with" line. I tried again because I felt so passionate about this, but was met with a reiteration.

After this, we fell out after I made a collection of socially retarded remarks that she took as an insults. A week later, though, suddenly everything dramatically changed. We became incredibly close after we became the targets of work place sniping, backstabbing, and back talking. We both stood up for each other and formed a VERY powerful bond. Since then (2 weeks ago), we've been spending hours together having deep conversations, texting nonstop, and talking on the phone. She keeps talking about how she wants to go to all the places I find special and wants me to go to places she likes. I've never experienced a person as loving, exciting, and exhilarating. I love her as a person to the utmost. So, much so, that I dropped all my barriers and allowed her to see the sensitive guy that I really am.

We had a conversation about the period in which the three rejections took place. She never denied that she is or was attracted to me. She did state that the socially retarded comments I made rubbed her the wrong way and she thought I was a jerk for a while which may explain the last two rejections.

Here's the problem. I absolutely LOVE her. I want her in my life forever whether it's as a friend or a girlfriend. I haven’t had luck finding too many people who are good friends. This girl has literally rocked my word with her extraordinary actions toward me. Yet, my love also translates into a need to have her as my girl. Friday night, she and I are having dinner at her place (I'm cooking). This is D-day. Should I make a move for the kiss, possibly risking her trust and friendship? Or do I view those previous rejections are indicative of her sexual attraction and just enjoy the amazing friendship I have now? Mind you, there is always the possibility that another dude will swoop in and that'll cut off the friendship.

Is there a way to go for it while at the same time inoculating myself against a backlash? I’ve already told her in very strong poetic ways how she makes me feel and how she betters me as a person. It hasn’t scared her off in the least. In fact, I even said to her that all my friends think I should go for it and she didn't say they were wrong.

krudler

If it were me, I'd make the move, at least you'll know for definite. Say you stay close friends, if she winds up meeting someone else it'll kill you to be around them when he's getting the affection from her you so clearly want. Could you honestly be in the same room with her and watch her kissing and hugging another guy, and cursing the fact you didnt take a chance?