Getting rid of a body

pickarooney

The paint in the bathroom had been steadily cracking for a while, bubbles forming under the surface. Last night I hit one of them a thump and saw the mold. Five minutes later a metre squared of sodden, decaying plaster was exposed. I'd known it for a while, but now I really am going to have to go at it with a wire brush and remove at least the immediately concerned zone, if not the whole room. It's kind of a relief to know it really has to be done now.

I'm not much into symbolism, but I decided to kill off a character that simply isn't working. Her life, spread over ten pages of self-indulgent backstory, is no longer of importance and her contribution to the novel could realistically be summed up in about three lines. She is, or was, essentially an animated MacGuffin.

How best to expunge a character? Ctrl-F for all references to her name, replace by blank and stitch the sentences together again or select the ten pages, hit Backspace and start again? How important is it to ensure any influence she had on other characters is now either removed or taken over by someone or something else?

And most importabtly, how do you recognise when you're writing a vanity character so you can smother her at birth?

dawvee

Well first, you get a vat of lye and... oh, that's not actually your question! :P

IMHO you'd probably be best off rewriting those pages from scratch, maybe borrowing lines from the old text if you had any that you particularly liked. I find that for major changes it's better to do it that way instead of selectively chopping, since it makes you rethink things to ensure they still make sense, flow properly, etc. after the change.

As for vanity characters, I'm not sure. I think most writers have had the problem of getting so far with a character and then having the forehead-smacking realization: "Doh! That's just [me/friend/family member/whatever] in a wizard hat!" There's not necessarily anything wrong with that, as long as the character as written is still interesting and suited for the role. I think the problem is mostly that, if it's you or someone you know, it can be harder to be objective when deciding. I think it's just a judgement call that you have to make, like you did in this case.

EileenG

If she's not absolutely essential to the plot, kill her. Even if you think she is essential, see if her plot functions could be done by other characters.

pickarooney

There's one other one who could, but he's on Death Row as it stands. I think I can get a pot plant to replace her

EileenG

At least the pot plant will have a short backstory!

Oryx

EileenG wrote: »

At least the pot plant will have a short backstory!

And if its not working you can just forget to water it.

I find this whole concept fascinating... and I really didnt just open the thread to find out how to dispose of a body... I dont even know there were 'vanity' characters, I presume it means your own ego talking through a character?

pickarooney

I don't know if it's a fixed term; I used it to mean a character who's not essential to a plot but is there either to speak on behalf of the author or as a vessel to carry grandiose but irrelevant ideas and descriptions.

In this case the character serves a small role in guiding another, important character, a certain way, both geographically and spiritually but mostly she's there to pimp out a device I dreamt up which is now known as the iPhone

pickarooney

I need a ruthless accomplice. Any takers? Basically I need a fresh opinion on whether or not she does contribute anything to the other character's development. I tried just setting fire to her and pushing her out the window of the plane but she left a vacuum.

Oryx

pickarooney wrote: »

I need a ruthless accomplice. Any takers? Basically I need a fresh opinion on whether or not she does contribute anything to the other character's development. I tried just setting fire to her and pushing her out the window of the plane but she left a vacuum.

Willing to offer my serial killer skillz. You just want me to read it, or to bump someone off? Cos if its the latter, we really need to take this to pm or hireahitman.com

pickarooney

I'll pull the trigger, I just need someone who's handy with duct tape. Will PM you with details.

looksee

Bummer, I thought you were going to wall her up in the bathroom and tile over her.

pauline fayne

looksee wrote: »

Bummer, I thought you were going to wall her up in the bathroom and tile over her.

so did i ! and why not ?:D

pickarooney

Well that's one character we won't be hearing from again! This is fun, I must off a few more while I'm in the mood.

Next challenge is a little trickier - combining two characters into one. The stories of each character end a bit abruptly but each is integral to his own part of the book so I had the harebrained idea of meshing them into one person.

Has anyone ever tried this and did it work or did you end up inventing one new character and rewriting everything?

EileenG

It might help if rather than trying to merge two characters, you invent a new one (with new backstory which you keep to yourself) who does the same stuff.