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Try not to laugh too loudly - Apparatus for Facilitating the Birth of a Child

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  • 05-03-2010 10:39am
    #1
    Victor
    Registered Users Posts: 78,290 ✭✭✭✭


    http://www.forbes.com/2010/02/22/kookiest-inventions-patent-entrepreneurs-technology-patent_slide_7.html
    Apparatus for Facilitating the Birth of a Child by Centrifugal Force (No. 3,216,423)

    With this ostensibly pain-easing contraption, one more fit for a NASA training center than a hospital, the laboring mother is strapped in and spun around at 82 revolutions per minute, fast enough to force the infant out of the birth canal and into the world. Not to worry: There's an internal governor that keeps the machine from going too fast and a cotton-backed net that's mounted below the woman to catch a flying newborn. Four decades later, hospitals still haven't signed on.
    :eek:


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    #2
    smcgiff
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,943 ✭✭✭smcgiff


    Now - if men had babies! :D


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    #3
    Star Lord
    Registered Users Posts: 30,123 ✭✭✭✭Star Lord


    smcgiff wrote: »
    Now - if men had babies! :D

    As they said in Men Behaving Badly, a quick nap, a pint and lunch then back to work in the afternoon ;)

    That device sounds awesome, why haven't they signed up? :pac:


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    #4
    looksee
    Registered Users Posts: 28,138 ✭✭✭✭looksee


    Well now, one of the obvious problems is the fact that the pivot is in the centre of the woman's back, so the amount of centrifugal force is not nearly as great as if it were in line with her head. However, this would mean that the contraption (contraction, see the similarity, its obvious it was meant) would need a minimum of a 12ft square space to spin in. And then a further clearance to allow for the spray of amniotic fluid, placenta and vomit. It really would not be practical. I wonder would it work for constipation?


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